15 Month Journey

[Charlie1]

I don't understand. Slogging, fighting, being miserable, sad, one foot in front of the other...and then...

I feel a little better today.

Seems like I have crossed some invisible boundry and am not being pelted with the usual doom and gloom (or should I say not letting my thoughts lead me into the "hole".)I think I am beginning to get it (thanks Paul) and doing my GREIF WORK. You are right, you have to lean into it and want to get out of it. Ups and downs all the time, but this feels different, something less fragile...like I am growing as a result of this. I can be patient with myself (thanks Shell.) Even if tomorrow, I slip, I am grateful for this one day and will try to remember how it feels so I can look forward to something again.

For all of us who read, ponder and wonder, I hope this serves as some small inspiration that there are good days too.

Hopefull,

Charlie1

[STARKISS]

Dear Charlie1,

This is truly a inspiration and I thank you for posting it, It is great that there are actual good days and grief is not just gloom and doom. Take care and thank you for this message God Bless You Shelley

[Paul S]

Hey, charlie, no charge! shell's cheap, too

I am glad for that statement you made near the end: Even if tomorrow, I slip, I am grateful for this one day and will try to remember how it feels so I can look forward to something again. That is important. Even if you do slip, and the slogging, the fighting, etc., happens again, you'll know that you can come back out of it. And you will.

It seems as if you've incorporated the loss into your life and have moved on a bit. Not moved away, moved on. You're carrying your loved one with you, but you're further down the path than when the loss ocurred.

Your post was an inspiration.

Paul

[shell]

Charlie,

I'm so happy for you. You are beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. The tunnel may go dark again, once in awhile, but, as Paul said, you know you will see the light again and I think that's one of the first steps to really healing. I also liked what Paul said about incorporating the loss into our lives. I guess that's what we all have to do. It's always going to be with us, but it can have it's own space in our lives. In the beginning it seems like our whole life, but by healing, it starts to be a part instead of a whole, with it's own special place.

Hugs to everyone,

Shell

[STARKISS]

Hi Shell and Paul,

I really like what you both said in your posts, I am in my sixteenth month for my mom and just about the one year mark for my dad and yes even though it has not been a full year I can say I am feeling a little better as time has gone by. Make it is because I had two close deaths in a row but I do not really know Take care and God Bless you both Shelley

[amanda]

hi charlie

how great to read that you had a good day.im still waiting for one but if it can happen for you it can also for the rest of us.

thank you for brightening my day a little.

loads of love

amanda

[STARKISS]

Hi Amanda,

I am going through on my sixteenth month since my mom died and next week will be the one year mark for my dad.. And through out the time I have been on my grief journey believe it or not I have had some happier days... I know you do not feel like you are going too but trust me I never thought I would be happy again either... Take care Amanda and God Bless You Shelley