Jump to content
Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Both Parents Died Within 5 Years

Recommended Posts

I lost my mom August 13, 2006, to Lymphoma and meningitis, she would have been 61 October 30 this year. Im just now starting to really feel the loss, as my parents 40 year anniversary occurs October 1, and my birthday October 4, moms bday October 30. I lost my dad 5 years ago to a brain tumor, he was 55, and then my mom. I feel so empty, and lost without both my parents. I am already on depressants which I started last year, after my mom met another man, which I guess didn't set well with me. The doctor says these pills may have been what helped me mourn, but I miss her, so much, and I am so angry at god for taking my parents away, espcially my mother. I know I shouldn't be mad at GOD but I hope he is helping my mom keep a watchful eye on me. I have had some coincidences happen since she died.

I just wanted to find a place to talk. I don't think I was prepared to lose my mom even though we knew she could go soon, and she went fast. She got sick in march of this year, and then died in august. At least I had no unresolved issues with either parent. I really need some advice. I do get up, get dressed every day, but then I remember something or think of something, and I just break down.

Talk to you all soon, thanks for listening.


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi maydakfamily,

First of all I wanted to say that I am very sorry for your losses. I also lost my parents close together, I lost my mom in April of 2006 She died while on vacation of diabetic coma complications. I lost my dad in August of 2006 to Non Hodgkin's lymphoma which was a big surprise to hear that he was sick. I lived with both parents for forty years and after they died I had to move out of the house as well as change jobs and give up custody of my dog Chelsea who I have had since she was five weeks old... I know live with a sister and her family but are slowing coping with all the changes... I hope this helps and I will keep you in my prayers Take care and God Bless You Shelley

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi maydakfamily,

I am so sad to hear of your losses. My wife died this year in April of a heart attack. I had been on antidepresants about a year ago and had gotten off of them when Karen died that was the first thing I asked for from my doctor. I think they have helped and can't imanige what it would have been like without them. This site is the perrfect place to write your feelings, no one will judge you here, and we will be here for you when you need us most. I wish I could take the pain away, and I remember thinking during those first weeks that I could just hit the fast forward button to a couple of years from now, and when I hit play again, I would still have the memories and experiences but they would have gone by a lot faster. Unfortunately we don't have that option and all we can do is to take this one day at a time. May God bless you and wrap his arms around you and allow you to feel the peace that only he can give.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Deb,

Welcome. I am truly sorry for your loss. I lost my Mom June 14, 2006, to COPD. She was 73, which I consider to be young. I think that your mom was very young to be taken from you.

This site will help you. I guarantee it. I have not been here very long, maybe a few weeks, and I already feel so much better. Just being able to "talk" to people in the same situation as I am, helps in ways you never knew existed! You will never be judged here, and are encouraged to write whenever and whatever you need to. You have just joined a family that cares, and will listen without criticizing.

I too am on anti-depressants...I have been since my husband was in a coma (he's fine now), and my oldest sister died, in 2001. I tried to go off of them once, and realized that I needed them!

I am angry also...I don't know who I am mad at...I think I am just mad that my mom is gone, and I can't call her anymore, or run up to her house.

What coincidences have you had, since she passed away? I would love to hear about them. I have had just a few, like the TV in the bedroom came on, by itself, and no one was in the room at the time. THat has happened 2 times. And, I was sitting at my computer, and the light I have on top of my cabinet just decided to off. I stood up, and told "whoever" that I really needed it on, and turned it back on.

You certainly found the right place to talk. Even though we are told that our Mom's are going to die soon, I still don't think we're prepared when it happens. I never, ever thought my Mom would die. Sounds silly, but I just alway thought she'd be here for me. Now she's not, and I really don't know what to do with myself. I took care of her, with the help of Hospice, and now there is no one that needs me to take care of them...

You are doing pretty good to get up every morning and get dressed. I don't get dressed every day...and most days, find me sleeping late, and just sitting in my recliner with my puppy. I don't feel like going anywhere or doing anything yet. It will come, I know it. Just not now.

So, welcome to the family and I am very sorry for the loss of your parents. Come back often, and say whatever you need to. We'll all be here for you.



Link to comment
Share on other sites


Welcome. I am so sorry for your losses, and both at such young ages. Our classic advice here is: Take one day (or sometimes even one hour) at a time. Don't try to push yourself and realize that it will take time to cope with all of it. I, too, take anti-depressants and they have saved me, I think.

Things will get easier to deal with. Just hang in there.

A big hug to you,


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...