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My Friends Can't Relate


KittyLove

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I am realizing that my friends cant relate to losing a family member. All of them still have their immediate family. I am/was one of those people that were closer to their grandparents because their mom and dad werent there--physically &/or mentally.

So I skipped a generation and clung to them.

I feel like I lost the whole kit and caboodle now that my gpa is gone. I tell my friends and they listen, but they dont know that crappy gaping whole feeling in your heart kind of thing.

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Kittylove,

I'm so sorry for the lack of support from your friends. Unfortunately, this is all too true...if you haven't been there, you just don't get it! There is a bright side. The friends I've made since my dad died are ones that I feel will be forever. I feel closer to them in a very important way. So, the people you meet now will probably be better friends than your old friends ever were. Especially ones you meet through any kind of grief support groups. Do you go to any support meetings? If not, you might think about it, because you could meet new people who "get it". Good luck.

Hugs,

Shell

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Kittylove,

It's too bad that you don't have friends who can relate. When my dad had his stroke and died, I was fortunate to have some friends who have already gone through the death of a parent, so I could talk to them.

As Paul told me in my thread about insensitive people, there are the people who get it and those who don't get it, and there are some people like my boss who gets it, yet at the same time doesn't. It's a strange world we live in.

Jeff

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Shell & JC-

Thanks for the input. I cant fault my friends for not understanding....unfortunately they'll know soon enough. I have always had to rely on older people anyway to help me through the difficulties of my life. I am now definetly realizing that as a young girl I had enormous responsibility. Most people my age have never related to things I was dealing with.

More than one person has told me to write a book. I wish I were a better writer :)

But, I digress, I guess its that feeling it sounds like we all have- the pain that is burning in my throat & my belly of frustration and the feeling of being alone. Even though I know I am not.

KL

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Kittylove,

That was one of the most surprising things that grieving brought to me, that feeling alone even though I'm not. It still just blows me away when I feel it. I sort of understand why we feel that way, and then sometimes I don't understand it at all. I think that's one thing that people who haven't been through it don't understand, that you go through SO MANY different emotions, not just sadness that you've lost someone. Hang in there. At least the people on this board make me feel so less alone, and I'm eternally grateful to them for that.

Hugs,

Shell

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