STARKISS Posted July 19, 2007 Report Share Posted July 19, 2007 Hi All,I am writing to ask if I should have set up the family picnic that has happened for the past five years... In the past my mom did the organizing of the event but since 2005 I have been the one to set it up... But now it just seems like no one is interested in coming we usually have it the third weekend in August... This year I gave up and did not do anything but now my mom's side of the family want to know why there is not going to be a picnic... I feel so very guilty because I should have done it... The month of August is not been good for me.... It started in 2003 with my uncle Don dying on the 21st... Than it was my dad on the 25th of the month two years later and now who knows what will happen... I just feel like I let everyone down and I really do not need all the family mad at me right now... I am stressed enough just from what life is given me so far.... Thanks for listening Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karenb Posted July 19, 2007 Report Share Posted July 19, 2007 Is 3 weeks long enough to get it planned especially since your Mom's side would like to be a part of the picnic. If you decide to plan it, would there be another family member that could help. I might be a good thing for you to carry on for your Mom and she would just be very proud of you. I don't know if that's good advice for you but in your posts you seem to be doing better. Breath in deeply and blow it out slowly repeating a nice and encouraging saying to yourself.....that can help stress sometimes. Let us know how it goes.KarenB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoubleJo Posted July 19, 2007 Report Share Posted July 19, 2007 Your moms' family can do the picnic if they want one that much. They don't seem to be thinking of your feelings. You are not obligated to do anything you feel you are not able to do. After all, you count too. my best- Doublejo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dpodesta Posted July 20, 2007 Report Share Posted July 20, 2007 I agree with Doublejo, if you aren't feeling up to planning the picnic then don"t let those know you would be happy to attend and help out a little but that you don't feel up to all the other things that go with planning. Take care of yourself and your recovery. Unfortunately not everyone knows what we are going through right now. Even those who have been through it might not understand since each of our journeys are completely different. I hope all goes well.Derek Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted July 21, 2007 Author Report Share Posted July 21, 2007 Hi All,The more and more I think about it I am feeling very guilty because of the promise we made to our mom.... But I just can not fight it anymore if the family wants to give up on each other than thats the way it will be... I no longer have a family.... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karenb Posted July 21, 2007 Report Share Posted July 21, 2007 I am very sorry to hear that. People certainly do react in such different ways to difficult situations. It would be hard to feel like you're in the middle. Do you have a large family and have they always been close in the past and these are some new feelings coming out? That would be hard to deal with. I hope you can work this out. You've been dealing with a lot. I pray things work out for you. KarenB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted July 21, 2007 Author Report Share Posted July 21, 2007 Hi Karenb,Before my mom and dad died we were the closes family that I ever knew this is why I think it is tearing me up so much... I want to keep my mom's promise but and I have tried to talk to the family but no one really cares but me... I suppose that I care so much because I lived with them and shared times with them that no one else did... We (my parents and I) did everything together and maybe it is jealous that the family has with me because I was so close to them... I do not know.... I just wish I had someone in the family to help me deal with this.... but it just seems like they have all drifted apart and do not want to be close anymore...I have one sister who I live with, and three brothers who I do not see much anymore.... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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