Jump to content
Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Need Advice,

Guest Gamer205

Recommended Posts

Guest Gamer205

For those that haven't heard my story about my friend's death here is the link that I made my orgional post:


I am haveing trouble still talking to his Mother Joan,I love her shes been a great friend and was a great mother for my friend,She did a lot for me comming and geting me and takeing me to his house,

Shes had it very hard since his death in 2004,She couldn't even go to his funeral because she was still in the hospital,

I don't know what to say sometimes,I want to call her but theres times I can tell she is going threw a hard time,I don't want her to think I have up and droped her because I don't call her but sometimes I don't really know what to say,I miss my friend so bad,And I know she misses him very much,

I'm afaird I might say the wrong thing or not say something completly right,I don't no when the time is right to talk to her about him,I just need some advice but I do love her a lot just don't know what all to say,

Thanks. :(

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If I were a mother of a son who is now gone and his best friend called or came to see me, I would most happily welcome him. I would want him to speak from his heart and I would give him the biggest hug ever! Just let her know you care about her and that you miss your best friend. Your conversation will naturally go from there. I really can't imagine that she wouldn't want to hear from you no matter how hard a time you all have had. Think about it and let us know.

Your friend, Karen :wub:;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Gamer,

You are not alone in your concerns, but I think the worst thing we can do when someone else is coping with grief (for fear of doing the "wrong" thing) is to do or say nothing at all.

I want to point you to some articles that you may find helpful:

Helping Another in Grief

What is Not Helpful to the Person in Mourning: A List of Don'ts

Words of Comfort for the Person in Mourning

Words to Avoid When Comforting the Bereaved

Common Myths, Misconceptions about Grief

When a Child Dies: Do's and Don'ts of Grief Support

Link to comment
Share on other sites


First, I would like to say that I am truly sorry for your loss. As for your friend's mom, why don't you tell her what you just posted here? I have been through 2 horrible losses and I believe that it hurts more for people to ignore our losses than it would if someone didn't say something exactly right. I think that she would probably really enjoy talking with you about your friend, it may help both of you. From what you have been posting I don't think that you could say the wrong thing to her. Reach out to her I really think it would help both of you.

Hugs & prayers, :wub:


Link to comment
Share on other sites

From a mother who recently lost her 18 year old son, please keep in touch with her and visit. My son's friends call me, send e-mails, and visit, just to check on me. They never say the wrong thing and it helps me keep my son's memory alive. Mothers love to talk about their children. Hearing his name and hearing stories about him brings me great joy. Don't be afraid. If she's tired she will tell you.

Hope this helps.

Robert Owen Davis Jr.

11-21-89 to 12-22-07

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Gamer205

Thank you all for your advice,I'd say you all are all right, :)

Renee I want to tell you I am so sorry for your lose as well,take care and hold in there,

You all are so nice and it helps to know that there are careing people still left in the world,and that you all are so helpful with advice.

:) I'm so glad I found this place back in 2005,I was siting at my computer and I was feeling bad back then and I went to google and just typed in griefing and come across this site,The best thing that ever happened to me is finding this site and the people here.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...