Jump to content
Grief Healing Discussion Groups

We Had The Memorial Service Last Friday

Recommended Posts

We had the Memorial Service for my Mom. I cannot stand the word "funeral". Never have liked it. Overall, it went great as it could go. I read a verse from the New Testament and a eulogy I had written about my Mom. I put together a Power Point video showing of pictures of my Mom. I think it was good.

So many people showed up to pay their respects and offer their condolences. It was great of them. A few people who did not show up, I am really disappointed in. I guess it is times like these where we see who our real friends are. As for all of those who did not show up, I feel like never speaking to them again. My Mom knew all of them and the least they could do is show up for 5 minutes to pay their respects. I am actually disgusted with a few of them. I guess this is natural.

But I still can't believe any of this! This whole thing seems like a weird dream that I wish I would wake up from.

Everything seems on hold and real surreal. Does this ever stop?! I just wish things would get back to normal, but I know they never will be again. My life has change forever without my BEST FRIEND.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

hi Aquarius7

I am glad to hear the service for your Mom went "well". I felt the same about my Dad's. While it was beyond painful at the same time it was also lovely and went off well .... I know my Dad was so proud and I bet he was chuffed at the whole thing.

It is tough when people you expect don't show. So many times I've gone to these and I've been slow to go and pay condolences, never knowing what to say but I've realised how much showing up means because I don't remember what anyone said to me but I do remember the people that were there and those that weren't !

You ask if this ever stops, I wish I could give you a positive answer. I have survived 6 months without my Daddy and I still want to wake from this nightmare but I can't. I wake every single morning dreading the day and week ahead, knowing it's not changing and trying to grasp that he's not coming home to me. I dont know "normal" anymore and I don't think I ever will, it's a new life now, one I don't want but am stuck with to just struggle on everyday waiting for the day I can be with him again.

hugs and love to you,


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Aquarius-I'm glad your mom's service was nice.I'm so sorry for it though.When I think back 5 months ago to my dad's,it hurts so bad.I'm proud of you and Niamh(and jealous) that the two of you actually spoke at the service.I didn't speak at my dad's and I regret it everyday.I just sat there and cried like a child,and he deserved more then that from me.My dad's funeral happened on a day we had a snow storm,and some of his long time buddies didn't show.I'm never gonna forgive those 'friends' of his.And about you not wanting to talk to them,and how we see who our real friends are...that's so true.People I thought loved me,I now realize they don't.Friends of mine are no longer friends,and that's ok,because you start resenting those people,and it makes you wanna hold on to the people who do love you.It's for sure a road of great change.I'm changing so much.I dont know where I will end up,but the change is needed,because I dont know how to go on how I was.You are so fresh into this pain.We are here to listen.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

aw thanks sweetie, that's such a lovely thing to say. I wish you didn't have regrets but your Daddy knows what was in your heart and that is so much more than any of us can ever put into words, your Dad was and is proud of you, you honoured him by having a service & actually going to it.

and yep we will all go on this change together

hugs to you both my dearest friends,


Link to comment
Share on other sites

{{HUGS}} I am glad your mom's service went well. I know what you mean about seeing who your, and her real friends are. However, we need to try to remember that we all grieve differently and know that sometimes no matter how hard we try, attending these types of things are very difficult for some people. I was also disappointed in some that did not attend my dad's service...yet some have more than made up for that since, in support of me or for my step-mom, and some have not. Who really knows why people make the choices they make in times like these?

Saturday will be 1 month, and things still move in slow-motion for me too. {{HUGS}}

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...