laidymondegreen Posted September 10, 2010 Report Share Posted September 10, 2010 My grandmother basically raised me, and I was at her house for hours every day from the time I was 8 until I was 14. My mother and I are not close, and I've always considered my grandmother to be my "real" mother. She's been sick since 2004, with multiple hospitalizations, broken bones, and illnesses. I lived about 5 hours away for this time, but visited as often as I could and called almost every day. This spring, as she got worse, I spent as much time with her as possible. She and I frequently told each other how much we loved each other, and she gave me many things that she wanted me to have after her death. We knew that she didn't have forever, and we both knew that things were going to be very hard on me once she was gone. We did everything we could to prepare. When she passed away in early April, I was pretty numb. I felt that most of the family who was at the funeral hadn't treated her (or me) well in life. I survived the funeral and the weeks immediately following by being angry at all of the people who had treated either of us badly, especially my mother, who was awful to us both, and my sister, who basically ignored us. I was even angry at my mother-in-law, who asked me to do her a favor which resulted in me not being present when my grandmother passed. Now, though, I don't have that to get me through. My support system consists almost entirely of my husband. My family and I are not close, and we just moved so I don't have any friends nearby. My husband tries, but he doesn't know what to say or do when I'm sad. We've thought about counseling, but our budget is really, really tight, and I haven't found anyone that we can afford yet. I miss her every day. She was the only person I loved and trusted, and the only person who loved and supported me, throughout my entire childhood. She was my touch-stone, and I'm not sure what to do now that she's gone. (Also, hello, and I hope that this sort of thing is what's supposed to be posted here.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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