Realiziing How Great They Were

[Aquarius7]

Since I have been an adult orphan since June 3 2010, I have even more than ever come to realize just how great my Mom and Dad were as people and as parents. Without them, the family is in an absolute mess. Everyone is really messed up, though dealing with it in different ways (the others; the greatest denial I have ever seen in my life, me; facing it head-on each and every day). I am doing grief work and have been doing a tremendous amount of grieving. They, from what I can tell, have done little. They simply want to run away from it and not even talked about it

In any case, I realize more than ever just how great My Mom and Dad were. Without them, life is aimless and a blur. With them everything seemed clear and focussed,

.

[Kavish]

I am glad that you keep your parents in your heart and they will heal it as they guide you silently and peacefully. You can only grow to encompass and encourage others to adapt.

Take care,

Kavish

[DebFromLodi]

So now is the time to stop and realize how they shaped your life. The good they gave you and how good you turned out because of it. Now you must continue your life living it for them, the way they would want you to do. Show everyone what wonderful parents you had through your actions and deeds.

Good luck on your journey.

[Princesspeanut]

My biggest regret is that until my father passed away I really did not realize how much of a wonderful person he was. To me he was always Dad and we had a bit of a strained relationship towards the end of his life because I felt that he was ignoring his declining health. After he passed away, going through photographs, hearing stories from family and colleagues made me realize what a wonderful man he was, whos life and ability to shine was not able to come to light because his disase held it back. Now I wish I knew, I wish I appreciated my father more. I wish he was back in my life so I could tell him how wonderful I think he is!! I feel like we didnt get a chance to know each other the way I wish we could have. I need more time with him! He was taken without warning and now I am left here with all these things I want to say and do with him that I can't! I try to get spritual and speak to him but it is so hard because I dont know if he can hear my thoughts or if I have to say these things out loud?

[niamh]

yep I'm with you Aquarius, I always treasured my Dad so so much and knew how special he was. What hurts so much now is that I find myself comparing the way people do things so much to how my Dad would do things and ABSOLUTELY NOBODY comes anywhere close to him. I try hard not to expect anymore because it's guaranteed disappointment.

It's such an enormous empty hole that cannot be filled.

Princesspeanut, I'm so sorry for the loss of your dear Dad, I lost mine without warning too. I try to talk to my Dad too and I just get so frustrated and weary at times because it's all one way. Sometimes I feel I'm simply talking to nobody, just thin air and that hurts. I want so much to be one of those people who is full sure all the time he can hear me, he is still with me just in another form.

((((hugs)))) to you both,

Niamh

[sweetpea]

Hi: My mom died November 5th, 2010 and my family is a mess too..

She was the clue that held our family together.

I am so disappointed and know my mother would not like us all to be so seperated.

She was married twice 6 kids with my dad and 4 with her husband now who is still aliveThe two families are seperated and step father thinks its ok.

My mom never did. One family is her motto. Hurts me that he does this. The 6

of us try to visit step father and when we do he has his nose in tv and barely talks to us.

When his kids are there he talks and all. We were all raised by him..