New Here, Loss Of Mother

[grace10]

My mother, age 96, passed on mid October. She had been in a lot of pain due to a shoulder fracture, and really had gone into a decline after a pelvic fracture earlier this year. She was at a really good nursing home. It all happened rather fast. I am surprised how well I am taking this, but have periodic tearfulness. I realize now how much anticipatory grieving really affected my life for years with her mild dementia and decline. My mother never believed in an after life, but, one evening I was at my computer and felt this most awesome feeling of love that felt like it was coming from her. Much comfort, but she has gone on now to wherever they go. So, now I am without a biological family, except in memories. More later. There's no more room here. Glad to have found this forum!

[Lostdaughter]

Grace10, I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. And I am so happy to hear that you had that feeling of love come over you. I don't know what happens when we die, but I do believe there is more than just death. Take care and you are not alone. There are those of us here who may not always write a lot (sometimes it's just too hard to get the energy), but we are here.

LD

[grace10]

Lostdaugher... Thank you for your kind words. Lack of energy to write? Yes, I understand that. I am a mid-life university student, so I have no choice but to write a lot, plus writing at work, but, at times, it is difficult to get it done. I had about two weeks of mostly "down time" from school after the loss. Its not easy, but it does get done.

[niamh]

grace10,

I am so sorry for the loss of your Mom. It is lovely to hear you had such a great feeling of love, I had a friend describe it to me, it happened her once with her grandmother and she said there is simply no way to even describe how powerful the love felt. I only hope one day I can know it for myself.

I'm glad you found your way here and I hope you will find some bit of comfort just knowing you're not alone in your grief.

as LD said, sometimes we write, sometimes we don't but we are always here,

hugs to you

Niamh

[grace10]

Thank you, Niamh. No, I do not know how to describe this love, except that it is a whole, complete, and unconditional love. I was actually playing a computer game called Bouncing Balls. So, now I when play this game and it reminds me of good things. My mother truly was a loving person who always encouraged me. When I think of her, I think of her saying 'You can do it.' Not that our relationship was perfect; far from it, but many things were healed in the course of time. And, of course, I am going through the wishing I could have been there more thought scenarios, but, I realize that's a normal part of grief.