My Thoughts On This Journey

[sunstreet]

I believe I need to trust my grief. As painful as this process is, grief is my friend and will guide me back to the life again. I believe I will make it through this journey. I believe the love Melissa and I shared is worthy of that and more. I aim to thrive in life. Melissa would have wanted that for me and I want that for me. I can not escape the work of mourning. It just must be so. And work, it is.

I encourage all of you as I do myself because it is essential to our future mental health to allow ourselves to grieve as long as it takes. I believe the only way to heal is to experience all the anger, frustration and despair. We are destined to shed tears drop by drop. There are no short cuts. I don't believe we "get over" death and grieving, we go through it, step by step.

I believe we all have our own unique way of expressing our grief but I think as long as it is changing, moving, it is normal grieving. I don't think grief is orderly or predictable.

We all have a right and a need to grieve. I am choosing to embrace my grief, I have that right. I am going to claim it as my own and I am going to work with it, and I am going to honour myself and love myself enough to experience it and get to that place of acceptance.

I am so sorry for all of you as you journey through, it is a painful journey, it is a lonely journey, and I know that Melissa is proud of me now as I am awakening to what my life has been. I was loved, I felt it, I still feel it. Tears are coming to my eyes as I type just now for I could swear I felt Melissa's hand on my shoulder. I can see her smile. I feel warmth.

Thank you to all of you.

Courage and Blessings,

Carol Ann

[marsha]

Thank you, Carol Ann - that was beautifully and simply stated, and so very, very true. Hugs, Marsha

[sunstreet]

Thank you Marsha.....and hugs back to you.

Blessings, Carol Ann

[MZM]

Hugs Carol Anne and thank u for that...

I got told this week to get the #$#% over it...

Needless to say, i have cut that cruel family member out of my life...such is this time in our lives hey? We will find out who true friends are and who has patience, love and understanding for us...

[sunstreet]

I am sorry that you experienced someone who does not know or understand what it is to be bereaved. It is my firm belief that these people perhaps are triggered by our grief and our pain to their own "stuff" that they just are not able to face...yet...if ever. Our task is to take care of ourselves first and foremost and surround ourselves with people and things that support and encourage our healing rather than hinder it.

I encourage you to reframe your thinking that the statement this person made is more about "them" than it is about you.

You have all of us here who understand and send you love, hugs and support.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

[wmjsca]

Hugs Carol Anne and thank u for that...

I got told this week to get the #$#% over it...

Needless to say, i have cut that cruel family member out of my life...such is this time in our lives hey? We will find out who true friends are and who has patience, love and understanding for us...

I am so sorry you had to hear that. People are very cruel and inconsiderate. I've cut may ties over the last month, and you're right, the true friendships will shine.