pinkpony Posted June 4, 2011 Report Posted June 4, 2011 so I went to colorado(where my dh & I hoped to live someday) for a week & I want to move. I was so at peace & happy while I was there, the 1st time in 7months, the moment I got back to az the peace was gone & the turmoil has begun. Moving is such a big decision especially to another state & w/o dh helping me it seems imposible. I have a home that I can afford here & w/ the economy I'm afraid of selling it & getting nothing, plus theres so many things that need to be fixed before I think of putting it on the market. I haven't gone back to work yet & I don't want to commit until I know what I'm doing. I told God in colorado that I was putting it in his hands, but as usual I keep taking it back, I also know you shouldn't make any "big" decisions the 1st yr, but aren't they all "big" decisions when you're alone? I know I'm rambling, but I just needed to put this out there.
Cheryl Posted June 4, 2011 Report Posted June 4, 2011 Pink pony I am so glad Colorado helped you feel better! Isn't it awesome to feel some peace? My fist trip after Mark died was to a foreign country and I remember coming home and feeling a deep sadness and regret that I couldn't move there. You are right to be cautious about making big decisions during the first year. I found that the change in scenery gave me a much needed break from grieving. I was able to just enjoy the peace of my surrounds. When I got home I was faced with my loss even more! I couldn't escape it at home! If Colorado is your dream, then hold onto it. Try not to let your emotions control your actions. Do the research, write down the pros and cons. Talk to others that have made the move. But most of all take your time. My mom moved 4 months after my dad died and after the high wore off she realized that her support network was missing and it was very difficult to build friendships in the thickness of grieving. Can you afford to spend the summer in colorado first?
pinkpony Posted June 4, 2011 Author Report Posted June 4, 2011 Cheryl great advice. & yes I do feel that the change of scenery was a nice break. I really don't have too many friends here, & all my children have moved out of state, so other than I own my home, my dogs & the familiarity of this place, there's really no reason to stay. I think I will start preparing my home(improvements,honey do list)to sell & that will take time, but when its done & I decide to stay at least I'll have a new home
kayc Posted June 4, 2011 Report Posted June 4, 2011 Unless you're really sure, I wouldn't do anything like that yet...maybe you can go there for a visit instead? Give it time and think about it before doing anything final. You've been thinking, you've made some valid points.
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