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Sudden Loss Of Beloved Cat


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Last Friday night I was visiting my parent's house and noticed one of our family pets, a 10 year old cat, seemed very lethargic. While I was at work the next morning, my dad took him to the vet and found out he had Feline AIDS, Leukemia and kidney failure. He spent the next four days at the animal hospital being treated. Today the vet called and said there had been no signs of improvement after running the tests. My dad told the vet to go ahead and put him to sleep.

I never had a chance to say goodbye and am now feeling extreme guilt that his life was ended too soon. The past few days I have been doing a lot of research online and I know the diseases were fatal, but I had read about many cases where the health could be managed to where the cat still had a good quality of life.

I also feel extremely guilty that no one was there with him or to say goodbye to him. I feel like he was probably confused at why he was taken there Saturday and then never saw another familiar face before he passed. If I had known they planned to put him to sleep, I would have gone to see him before it was time.

I just feel like this all came about so suddenly and I can't help but thinking a hasty decision was made. I know my dad would have taken the advice of the vet, but I still can't believe he made this decision and did not tell me until it was too late to see him. If I had known of the decision earlier, I would have fought to bring him home and at least try some of the methods I had learned from the success stories online.

My family has always cared for our pets until we knew it was time for them to go. I just feel like he wasn't given as much of a chance.

How do I get over the feeling of guilt that we didn't try enough options to help him? How do I cope with feelings of guilt about never telling him how much we loved him and not being able to tell him goodbye and be there with him before he passed? I can't help but feeling that he passed without knowing how much we still truly loved him.

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I am so so sorry. Losing a pet is so tough. I have lost two and can't even think about my dog's death...so I don't. He is young and in good health. But as far as I am concerned it is losing a family member.

I have done a lot of guilt about my Bill's (husband) death. What I could have, should have done. I am arriving at a place where i can begin to think the thought: "I did my best under the worst of circumstances". Guilt when we REALLY did not do anything wrong but feel we did, when our intentions were always good....that kind of guilt is just a way to beat ourselves up. It is about us...not the person/pet who died, I feel. I am working on this, mind you. It is theory but I am attempting to get the theory into my heart.....I hope you can come to a place of peace. I know it is tough to know your cat died without family around. That is tough and i am so sorry. Feel your pain, grieve and hopefully don't beat yourself up. It is MY journey...I have not mastered it, believe me.


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I'm sorry you lost your beloved family member. wow, he had so much to deal with, poor kitty! You let him know while he was alive how much he meant to you and he knew it...they just know. When they're put to sleep, they don't know they're going to die, they just feel sleepy, which must be a welcome thing for them when they don't feel good. My heart and prayers go with you.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I finally have a cat, Willy, he was a stray and we absolutely love him. My heart is breaking with you and I know how guilt creeps in and hurts us. Just know you are not alone and I am with you. You will get through this. Guilt is part of grief and you will sort it all out. Debbie

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