Rachel, yes I have it too. I didn't get over my mom and then my dad died and its a double whammy. Like someone said to me in a post there is no timetable and we all heal in different ways and in times. You had to do what you had to do to get thru what you were going thru. I'm in tears, my fuse is extremely shotrt and I think you are right that now you can let down your guard a little you are dealing what's been tucked away in your mind. I can relate and wish you the best.