missing him

Mary - I am so sorry to hear about you losing yet another friend. Death is the most painful thing in the world to exerience. Sounds like you both were lucky to have eachother through the difficult times. Take care of you, Missing Him

Thank you for sharring this information. I am going to purchase. I'm sure I will be crying as I turn the pages... Missing Him

Mary - what a strong woman you are. I am thinking of you and I hope you heal and get the well-deserved rest that is needed. You and many other members on this site are always there for us. I wish you all the best. Missing Him

This was beautiful. Exactly how I fell. Thank you for sharring. Missing Him

I'm so sorry you are struggling. I know exactly how you feel. This will be the most difficult thing we all have to go through. Try to remember that John would not want you to suffer so bad. He would truly want you to live life through him and his memories. I know it is easier said than done. I'm not doing good either and going on 3 months come August. It feels like a part of us has died with our loved one. Turn to people who comfort you. Missing Him

So sorry. I still can't bring myself to go through his things.

It has been awhile since I posted/replied on here. I'm not doing well. It doesn't feel like anything will make me feel better. I cry every day and the tears come without warning. I have no energy to want to do anything. I know I should be walking, exercising, doing something for me. I just can't bring myself to doing so. I still can't believe that my husband is dead. August 4th will be 3 months. I can't believe he left me all alone. I don't know how to live life without him. I don't know who I am anymore. (Tears are coming down my face as I write this). Dave - I'm so sorry to hear about your home being broke in to and losing your memories - that is awful. Mary - great topic - "Significant Quotes". I like what I read from others too. Thank you. I'm always thinking of you all... Missing Him

Mary - sorry you are having some difficult days (more than usual). I know you are tired but I also know you will rise above this. Thanks for sharring that video - sad times for sure. Take Care of You...

I am hanging in there. Still struggling, feeling sick to my stomach and no energy to do things. I did manage to do some house cleaning. I have to go to the grocery store and I just don't want to. I wait to the very last minute (Until I run out of items) then I go. It is so hard going on w/o him and I will never understand why he was taken from me so sudden and too young. A day doesn't go by that I don't cry - and it isn't just one time - it is through out the day. I think what you acomplished is a huge step forward in your healing process. I haven't replied/posted anything in awhile because I get in that mode where I shut off, depressed and tell people I'm okay when I know that I'm not so I can just be alone in my sorrow...Probably not the best thing to be doing. I think of everyone here who have reached out to me. Missing Him

Mary, I will definatley check that out online. I have never done any meditation before but have thought about doing so. Thank you as always - Take care of you

Mary, I appreciate what you said and I'm sorry about your husband Mike. Is sure feels like I will feel like this forever. Such heartache. Missing Hime

DeAnne, I hope you had a better day today. I was able to make some jokes at work but still managed to cry at work and on the ride home. Mary - You explained it perfectly. I hope you are feeling better and getting over your sickness. Missing Him

What can I say...Some people are idots. I have had someone tell me "to just get over it, nobody is worth it". I told her that I didn't despise my husband like you despise yours. Ugh! I hope things work out for you. This is an unfortunate situation and I'm sorry. Missing Him

Mary - I sure hope you are feeling better and aren't getting pneumonia. Stress, crying, etc. sure can get us to feeling horrible. I have been fighting chest pains since I lost my love and I have contributed it to anxiety/anxiety attacks. Last night the chest pain woke me up for the 1st time so that was a little scary. I've been monitoring my blood pressure and it is low but I'm not feeling dizzy or anything. I think it's all anxiety. Keep on resting. Missing Him

Thanks Dwayne. I had another rough day today. I came across some pictures and a video I found of the cabin we would always go to. Some things he said on video made me laugh then I started balling. I miss him so much and want him back. I don't feel like doing anything and I don't want to get in a deeper depression than I already am. Missing Him

You are welcome. You are always there for us.

DeAnne - Makes me hopeful to hear that you are having a few more good moments. Do you mind me asking what "tools" your therapist suggests, if any, to help you through this? I have done some journal writing but I tend to talk to him more than write. I am seeing a therapist and she suggested me reading the book "Faith In The Valley" which I purchased. It does bring some comfort.

Hope you get to feeling better.

I'm impressed that you did this trip and enjoyed yourself. That picture is breath taking. Thank you for sharing. You do need your rest now.

Babylady - Sounds like John adored you just like my baby. Everytime I told him I love him, he would always respond with, "I love you more". He always told me that I was his angel and was sent to him. His illness brought us even closer than we were. Most people wait a lifetime to hope to find that someone to love them like our husbands loved us. I hope you feel better and get through your illness. Missing Him

Anne - so sorry to hear about your loss as well. I have looked into support groups but the one that is close to me is when I'm at work. I will keep looking in to it and maybe I can work something out with work as they have been beyond supportive. You hit it right on - I too am exhausted like you. He was the love of my life and his death was so sudden. I appreciate what you wrote. Thank you. Missing Hime

Thank you all for your responses. I have never expierenced death before. This is my first. I too placed my head on his chest, kissed him and held him. His body was cold and stiff. His face looked so peacefull and his mouth was closed and it even looked like he had a little smile going on. I have my parents and sister's support but it just isn't the same. All I want is him - his love, his touch, his support and him to talk to. I too am exhausted from taking care of him (which I would do it all over again), I was the only one working, taking care of the house, taking him back and forth to doctors, in and out of hospitals and now I'm exhausted trying to live with the fact that he is gone. This is the worst thing ever for someone to go through. Thinking of you all. Missing Him

I seem to be getting worse, not better. July will be 2 months that I lost my husband and it still feels like yesterday. I cry so much and I have no control when the tears come. I will be at work, in my car or at the grocery store and the tears just come. I break down asking him, "how am I supposed to go on without you?" He was all I had and now I feel as though I have nothing. I don't know how to live life without him. I took care of him for so long and so looked forward to coming home to him and just holding him. I loved knowing he was laying next to me. I couldn't sleep if he wasn't next to me and I get up at least 4 times now that he is gone. I don't think I will ever understand this and strugging if I can even accept this. I just don't know how to do this. I have such heartache. Missing Him

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss and your health issues. Can your health insurance provide you with an "in home nurse" or maybe you can look in to hiring one?? I will keep you in my prayers. Missing Him

I know it does. You have helped so many people here and I know you will get through tonight. Remember all the good memories. Thinking of you. Missing Him