iPraiseHim

On 5/30/2019 at 8:45 AM, george p said:

I am fairly new to this site, but have found it very helpful .

 Today would have been our 59th anniversary , it will be a real### , but I have been trying to follow the advice of my grief counselor and so many people on this site, one step at a time.  I am like a yoyo and I expect it to be that way for a while.

 I try my best to focus on the good times we had (there were many) , but it is hard to do with tears in my eyes. I remind myself over and over that we were very fortunate in our life together , so many people are not.

I have been trying to not focus too much on the future, past what am I going to fix for supper tonight . I joined a gym and do the AARP Silver Sneakers group , it has been helpful , it is a start. I am fortunate to be in pretty good health for 80 years old and I see that every time I have my INR checked ( I go today ). Physically I do pretty well , mentally is still a huge work in progress, this site helps because it is here 24/7 . Just putting my feelings on the page seems to help. A lot of my support group have a lot of problems and I do not want to add to them. They want to help , but they really don't know how. I do have a good friend who has lost his wife, but it was 15 years ago.

 I have been trying to get at least one thing done a day, I used to buy a lot when I went to the grocery store ( I have been doing that for some time because Mary had mobility issues) , but now I may go buy just a couple of things at a time just to give me something to focus on. Today is INR day,  Walgreens has the coffee I love on sale , I hate to pay full price for coffee even if it means making a special trip ( it is only two blocks from me) .  So I have two things to focus on , also it is exercise day , it will be a busy day.

Just reading some of the post makes me realize how many people are in the same place and we will all survive .

George P

 

George, You are doing better than you know.  Don't worry about the leaky eyes and roller coaster feelings.  You are doing good things and are on the right path.  Most people outside of this group do not truly understanding and deal with this grief and healing journey.  I just joined a gym six months ago and have noticed some good improvements in my strength, balance and stamina.

The good memories are what sustain me in the darker times.  Feelings will come and go. Over time they will become less intense.  They still hit me out of the blue for no particular reason.  I just feel them and keep moving forward. Just keep  doing, sharing, reading, learning, adapting and growing.  😊 - George C. - Shalom

Yesterday was an interesting day!  I called her to wish her a happy birthday and her 30 minute conversation put me late to work.  I hit heavy traffic so arrived later than I planned.  Then my client (who hardly ever talks) was bending my ear for another twenty minutes... Then I received several phone calls, vacuum broke ( I brought a spare). So I finished up an hour later than usual.  I stopped by a friend's work for a short visit ( and hugs) and she decided to fix me a KETO meal for my birthday.  It was delicious...

My car inspection is due this month and I wasn't able to get it inspected on Wednesday. As I was driving to Planet Fitness, I got a prompting to just stop by the car inspection shop and see when would be the best time to come on Thursday.  Timing was perfect! They inspected the van, fixed a minor issue and it passed with no additional charge. It has freed up this morning.. I felt like I won the inspection lottery.

While waiting for the inspection I spoke with another fella who has diabetes and loves airplanes.  His conversation got me stirred up to pursue my dream of flying.... he seemed interested in the low carb lifestyle to combat diabetes.

The state inspector remembered me and commented that I had lost a lot of weight!. I shared KETO, IR(Insulin Resistance), and how to keep from getting diabetes.  He was intensely interested.  I thanked him for his work ( and tipped).

You never know how a day is going to turn out.  

Today is another hot day (95) and it is 87 in the home right now.  However I have a cool bedroom and bathroom thanks to a window air conditioner and God's Grace.  

Work continue's to pick up... I have another estimate for work this afternoon.

I just keep pressing forward to the mark. 😊 - Shalom  

On 5/30/2019 at 1:35 AM, KarenK said:

This is stupid and I know it. Tonight, I knocked my favorite coffee mug(empty) off the counter and it shattered into many pieces,along with what's left of my heart. I just sobbed. It was a souvenir mug from Yellowstone. I had waited 50 years to return to the Tetons and surrounding area where I spent the best summers of my life. We made the trip before Debbie and Ron were diagnosed with cancer, a good time in our lives filled with traveling memories.

My son is a whiz with steady hands and Gorilla Glue and although it won't be usable, I will keep it for the memory. The older I get, the more those memories fade from my brain.

Too bad Gorilla Glue doesn't work on hearts.

I completely understand.  Things break, stop working, and it feels like a piece of them is slipping away. However, I know that they memories are always in my heart.  Gorilla duct tape is great for most things but won't fix a broken heart. - Shalom

Today is my birthday and I am having a good day.  I worked this morning and took off this afternoon to enjoy some rest and relaxation.  This is a new experience that I am accepting as it is.  Work scheduled tomorrow and all of next week.  I take each day as it comes.

My sister called on Wednesday to ask if I still plan to follow "This KETO Diet thing?" I told her, that after two years, this is the best I have felt and I enjoy this way of eating and living.  So YES!  I plan to eat this way for the foreseeable future. She didn't understand.... Oh yeah, she wants me to sit with DAD again...on June 6th her husband has another foot surgery scheduled.    My work schedule is very busy so I'll see what I can do.   - Shalom

This time of year, our city has a Jubilee festival with a beautiful fireworks display in the evening.  This happened tonight and I stood outside my home watching it and remembering the last time Rose Anne and I watched it together. I oohed and awed just like we did before while being bitten by mosquitoes.  Tonight, she didn't get bitten.  - Shalom

Today is my wife, Rose Anne's, Birthday. I woke up melancholy and blue. This is the fifth birthday she is celebrating in heaven. I really miss her today.  I continued a tradition we started years ago. I bought a meal ( non-KETO) and thoroughly enjoyed it with her.  I am reminiscing about our life together. The meal tasted good but it is just not the same as being together and present.  Happy Birthday, my love. - Shalom

3 hours ago, george p said:

I am amazed at the response I have gotten and from different parts of my post. THANKS

... I am also looking into joining a local health club that has a program for seniors , maybe if I pay the fee it will motivate me to get up and move some, I am fairly active but not enough.

When I go to coffee I drive by the cemetery that we have the plot in and I usually send Mary a few thoughts, I also go by ,sit on a very nice bench close to her and have a good cry. Julie told me to talk to her as much as I could, but I am finding that hard, it is getting a little easier as time goes by. 

Thanks

George p  

 

 

I joined Planet Fitness $0 Down $10 month five months ago After not going to a gym for 40 years.  I have an active physical job but discovered that weight resistance training would help with my IR (Insulin Resistance).  I started out slow and asked their trainer to develop a personal fitness goal for me.  At first, I was so disappointed at how out of shape I was. I had always planned to "exercise at home but never got around to it.  I have progressed in five months from very minimal to now hitting most of my Initial goals.  I could only do 3 sets of 5 WALL Pushups to now 3 sets of 30 Knee pushups at 1 foot off the floor. I could only do 3 sets of five Squats to now up to 31 squats, 3 sets.  All of my weight resistance weights have improved as well. I am even doing HIIT(High Intensity Interval Training) Elliptical Cardio for 20 minutes.  I continue to slowly push myself for better strength, endurance, and stamina.   Start slow and find your path. 

I still talk to my wife.  It gives me comfort and peace.  - Shalom

On 5/14/2019 at 9:13 PM, A&K said:

I’m finding it so hard to get up in the morning or sleep at night or eat much.  My anxiety, depression, and grief are utterly overwhelming.  I’m in therapy and on medication.  But still I struggle.  For the life of me, I can’t figure out why I’ve lost my way.  😢  I don’t want to let my boys down.  But I’m just not that strong.  My heart has so many missing pieces from losing my husband and our children.  Sometimes I find it a real struggle just to breathe in and out.  And I feel so alone in the way I feel.  

Katie,

You struggle because so much has happened to you and your family and your world is ripped apart.  You are human and none of us could withstand it on our own. Medication and therapy helps.  I and many other people here pray and intercede for you daily.  You are never alone.  I understand the difficulty in just breathing at times as I went through that when my wife died... many others experience this as well.  My Prayers are real simple.. "Lord help me!" God loves you (as his child) just like you love your children. 

I feel so alone in the way I feel too!.  It is a part of this grief.  You are not alone.

Continuing prayers for you Katie. -George   - Shalom  (The Supernatural Peace of God be with you)

On 5/15/2019 at 7:14 AM, george p said:

Thanks for the response to my post, it helps to know I can let my feelings out here. I have a great grief counselor , but she isn't here 24/7.

I am mostly okay, but as someone else posted it is amazing how many things remind me of Mary that it is crazy. It is the unexpected things that throw me for a loop , one of the hardest things for me to do so far was to remove her toothbrush from the bathroom, my brush looks so lonely hanging there by itself. She was in the bathroom when she passed (we only have one) & it is hard to go in there without reliving those few moments , I try to cope by remembering that she passed peacefully and quickly. She told me a few weeks before that she felt she was just waiting to die, we discussed it just a bit and I didn't think a lot about that statement, but as I look back on it I think she knew her time was short. Julie (the grief counselor) told me to try not to look back at things that you can not do anything about, but that is very hard to do.

 Her name was on all of our accounts and I am getting a limited trust set up so putting all of the stuff in my name makes it simpler. I have every thing done except changing our primary checking account , I am struggling with taking her name off of the checks. We don't write very many checks per month , so I don't see the checks very often.  Julie told me to think of the good things around me so I think I will keep the checks like they are. Mary was a RN for nearly 30 years and a lot of the assets we have are a result of her income. 

 I have been learning  to cook items that I have never tried before because we had a freezer full of stuff that I had never tried to cook. Mary would cook the steaks and salmon ,I would heat up the stuff from the frozen food isle , we bought a small air fryer several months back,I have fallen in love with the thing. I have been doing French fries and several things in it , but never big stuff, I have moved on to steaks , last night I cooked some salmon in it and was very pleased with the results. 

 I am moving forward very slowly . Thanks  for listening. 

 Every one take care.

 George

Hello George P,

It has been four years since my wife died and my wife's name is still on the business and personal checks.  Most  of the checks written are electronic bill-pay now anyway except for the tax man. I cook most of my meals in an air-fryer and an electric pressure cooker (like an Instant pot),  I keep my meals simple, easy to make and delicious.  I transitioned to eating from fast food/convenience foods to cooking real foods two years ago.  The grief waves will come and go for no particular reason.  It is important to get plenty of good sleep, eat healthy, drink clean water , and continue to move (exercise).  This is a great place to hang out learn, share, and help each other.  These people understand how to deal with this grief, offer tools, help, and love to listen. 

George is a good name... 😊  - George... Shalom

27 minutes ago, kayc said:

Marg,

I hear ya!  I'm five foot also.  I broke in my car today, scraped the hubcap.  I was so mad at myself, even though I can easily blame it on my dentist's narrow parking (about 6" on each side so I parked next to the curb to give the next person more room to get in without dinging my car).  Grr!  Oh well, I'm sure there's more to come over the years.  This car is much wider than my Volvo or last Civic.  Such narrow spaces shouldn't even be legal though!  Even doing away with one space to give everyone an extra inch or two would help!

Mitch,

your car is beautiful!  And you have much nicer hubcaps, are they after-market?  BTW, I LOVE my car!  I've gotten 40 and 37 mpg, my old Civic averaged 38 mpg, I'm thinking this will be similar even though it's so much bigger.  And this one is much more comfortable!  I am able to pump up the seat to make me taller, it adjusts every which way!

George,

you are very early in this, it stands to reason you need someone to talk to more frequently than counseling sessions...this place literally saved me when I lost George (good name!  )...I didn't know where to begin with this!

I agree! George is a good name. 😊

On 5/11/2019 at 9:37 AM, JTP said:

Another Saturday. The calendar tells me it is 21 weeks (147 days) today since Bob died on December 15, 2018. I disagree - it was just a few minutes ago.  We had finished decorating the tree, putting up some outside decorations and were out in the yard playing with the dog. It was 4:30 pm. It was a perfect, ordinary day. We spent it together. Happy doing little things. I came in the house - Bob stayed outside to get some Christmas gifts out of the car. I got ready for the hot tub. Went to get a glass of wine for Bob - looked outside and there he was lying on the ground. I ran outside and as soon as I saw him I knew he was gone - I will never forget his eyes. I call 911 and started CPR. Help arrived but Bob was gone. He had no history - no symptoms. How could this have happened? Why did he no stand a chance? 

I have had the greatest support system anyone could ever ask for - and yet - it has done no good. Bob is still gone. I cannot accept that. I wait and wait and wait. The nightmare has to be over soon but it goes on and on and on. My heart breaks more and more every day.

I have reached out to grief counsellors - no help there. As a nurse and bereavement counsellor in the past - I know all the "stages", I know you have to "go thru it" - it is all crap. No one understands. The pain consumes. It has an energy all of its own.  I have no energy - I have no interest. I have a dog who gets me up every day. I can't do what I did with Bob and I can't do things I never did with Bob. And don't dare tell me I am stuck!!! One person told me this reaction was my "choice" - and then whenever I "choose" to move forward - let him know and he would help. All I learned from him was how to say NO - when he asked if I would like to talk to him again - I said NO. The second person at least had some empathy but all else she had was a checklist - do this, this and this - it might help. Otherwise time and btw - I know this is awful for you. 

I wake up everyday - Bob is not beside me. I go to bed every night - Bob is not beside me. In between - there is nothing. 

My soulmate, my best friend, the love of my life is not with me - he cannot talk to me, he cannot hold me, he cannot kiss me or love me. I miss him so much. No one understands. Do you?

Reading your story, I can so relate to your pain and grief.  This group and wonderful people here listened and understood when I couldn't grasp exactly what happened to my beloved wife.  The Shock and Awe of her sudden death rocked me to the core.  I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. and had trouble just breathing.  It's been four years now and life after has never been the same.  this place helped me to sort out life and learn tools to deal with this grief and healing journey.  MartyT, has some great resources here that really help and all these wonderful people listen, care, and share.  You are not alone for all of us here understand your grief and learning to cope with this afterlife. Welcome to the group that nobody wants to join yet we are drawn together with this common bond. {{{Hugs}}} - George - Shalom

2 hours ago, TomPB said:

Well year 3 continues. The pattern of OK periods alternating with grief attacks continues. The OK periods may be getting longer and better, but the grief attacks are as bad as ever when they come.

I had the thought recently that I'm starting to think of my life with Susan as something in the past. Earth people would say "Well, obviously" but you know what I mean. That really set me off. I miss her so much.

Yes.  The same with me.  This is my fifth trip around the calendar without my beloved, Rose Anne.  I have been attempting to just focus on the "Here and Now".  Thoughts, memories, feelings, still come and go for no apparent rhyme or reason.  I try my best to just feel them instead of all of the other bad coping strategies I have tried before.  My Happiness/Joy seems to be at least half or less than before when we were together.  I cherished each day then and the good memories sustain me now.  I work, I continue to optimize my health, eating, exercise, etc..  The loneliness and physical separation is the toughest part of this journey.  I miss the natural feedback of knowing she love me as I am faults and everything. We were the same age.  She was one week older.  I still miss her daily.  - Shalom

Remembering my Mom today. It was her Birthday and I miss not being able to surprise her and show here how much I love her.  She taught me everything. The love of reading, playing, learning and just having fun.  She made us feel special and taught me how to take care of myself. (Cooking, cleaning, ironing, washing.drying, folding, sewing, crocheting, knitting, canning, etc...) Sweet precious memories of a simpler life.  Happy Birthday, MOM.  I love you! - Shalom

8 hours ago, kayc said:

George, my son and I talked last night and he told me his BP is 120/62 and his cholesterol is low, all his numbers are good, A1C great, still on KETO maintenance.

I am proud of all you are doing and how you are handling the family dynamics, good for you!

This is great news about your son's health.  Praying for your surgery and healing. - Shalom

I have been very busy with much needed work and business growth.  I'm still following Ketogenic living (23 months now) and getting healthier.  Today I will hit a new milestone as I attempt to complete 3 sets of 30 leg squats in my normal physical exercise routine.  I continue to keep progressing to stronger and healthier ways to eat, move, and live.

This is my fifth time around the calendar without my beloved Rose Anne. I am focusing this trip to be really engaged in the NOW(today) and learning to evaluate how much my FEELINGS are tied to my thoughts and actions.  Feelings are not good or bad but how my brain see them can color my day.

I woke up yesterday and today more melancholy than usual. I realize that 31 years ago today is the wonderful day that I first met my beloved Rose Anne. It rocked and changed my world.  I till miss her every day.  I don't think that will every change.  I have learned not to stuff,hide, eat, etc.. over these feelings.  I just let them come and then release them.  It is all a part of life.

The dynamics of my native family has deteriorated and I am just learning to accept it as it is.  My sister called again as she needs me to help her with her plans.  She gets passive aggressive when things don't work out according to "her" plan.  She can own her own feelings.  I chose to disconnect and distance myself from that drama.  I did have a wonderful conversation with my Dad on Tuesday and he is doing much better.

May is a challenging month with lots of wonderful memories and sadness.  Such is life.

One day at a time... marching forward to the mark.  - Shalom 

On 4/29/2019 at 7:54 PM, SJC said:

My husband Patrick, died 2 1/2 years ago at the age of 63. We were married for 40 years. I'm considered (so some tell me) to be a young widow since I was 60 when he died.

I'm writing because I want to know if others are also feeling what I've been feeling lately and if it's part of the grieving process. I sure have experienced everything others have shared. Numbness the first year - just trying to survive since I had never been alone in my entire life. He and I did everything together. Never even stayed alone in my house for one night without him since we were married! Crying seems second nature to me now.   The second year was difficult because I was exhausted from having to do everything myself and the reality started to settle in that this is my life and I will never see, talk to or hold or be held by him again. How could I go from being so happy to such despair. I know this is a part of life but my emotions are shouting , NO, this is not what I want right now!

Now, I'm heading into the 3rd year and I've noticed these past few weeks, a whole other level of sadness that's different than before. Maybe its because its a new season - Spring -approaching. I do remember reading somewhere that the change in seasons can also trigger grief because it brings up specific memories during that particular season of things we used to do together. I was out walking my dog (got her the day of my husband's service...given to me by one his family members) and I was aware of families being out and cleaning up their yards together, and I just lost it. I feel like I don't have that sense of belonging like I did. Not only that, most of the people who were support people, have dwindled out of my life because they think I should be over it by now. Therefore, the sense of isolation can be very overwhelming. Has anyone else had a similar experience? Do you find support groups helpful? I went to one Hospice Support group meeting and came home feeling more depressed than when I went! I'd rather do things together.... and chat...walk...shop... eat.... laugh and cry together. I would so appreciate any insights if others had a harder time going into the 3rd years. He died, Feb. 16, 2017. 

thanks all, Love and Blessings...

Sue

My beloved wife, Rose Anne,  died February 16th, 2015.  And yes the third year hit me very hard as well. We were married 25 years and the loneliness and separation from my beloved wife is still difficult to bear.  This is my fifth trip around the calendar without her and I am gradually learning to just live in the now and accept life as it comes.  I function but it seems to me dimly compared to my past life with her.  I still operate a business and try to help other people with Diabetes to learn the truth about the disease and that there is hope and healing.  Grief and healing is a part of this process of life and the price we pay for having such a wonderful loving marriage and friendship.  I just take this journey one day at a time and strive to make the best out of each day, count my blessings, and strive to push forward to the mark. - Shalom

Welcome and glad you found this special place.  People here listen, understand. and share in your grief.  Please share as you are able as I find it really helps me to get the thoughts swirling out of my head and expressed.  We are the ones left here to stay awhile longer as we finish our mission and purpose on this side of life.  Praying you find the peace, grace, and comfort, to adjust to this phase of life.  We all have a purpose and plan.  This grief is another form of love expression for your beloved husband.  - Shalom

On 3/27/2019 at 1:33 PM, Kayla82 said:

I'm missing my dad so much today. For the last two years he had been fighting leukemia. He did to go into remission the first time very quickly but then it came back in January of 2018. We knew his health  was getting bad because he could hardly want to the bathroom without feeling so tired. My mom  came out of the bedroom and found my dad laying on the floor not responding but breathing. Once we got to the hospital we had found out he had a massive brain hemorrhage. He passed away peacefully hours later at 12:07 a.m. on 3/8/2019. I never seen anybody pass away and when he took his last breath I bolted out of the room screaming as i walked down the hall.. lately i don't want to really talk to anyone and when i do, they mention that he's no longer suffering and i knew it wasn't going to be much longer before he passed. I agree but it wasn't supposed to happen like this.. 

11 years ago, I watched my Mom take her last breath.  She was the first person I had seen die.  I understand the shock of it.  People say weird things thinking they are trying to help you but they are really just comforting themselves.  It's probably what other people have told them.  Unfortunately, there is much that is not in our control and bed things happen.  It took me awhile to get that image out of my head.  I hope you have a grief counselor or trusted friend who can listen and help you to deal with this.  My prayers are for you, Kayla.  {{{ HUGS }}} - Shalom

On 3/25/2019 at 8:25 PM, Johnny said:

Hi George,

I am sorry for your loss. Yes, I believe that knowing there are other caring people who share the same pain is something I need. I see others continuing on with their lives at work doing the things I used to like to do when my wife was still with me. This valentines day almost killed me. Everyone was so excited talking about how they were going to spend the day with their special love one.

I just sat there in unbelievable pain not able to utter a single word or find one comforting thought.

My sister invited my to her boyfriends birthday party and I accepted feeling lucky just to have something to do to get me out of the house. There is nowhere in my home that I can look without being reminded of my loving wife. The first thing she did when we married was to make my bachelors look vanish and put a women's touch on my home. She was amazing that way.

When I arrived at my sister's boyfriends birthday party I was not prepared for what I saw. Everyone there was a couple except for me. I wanted more than anything to feel the happiness I saw in others around me. To feel again what it feels like to have your life's love right by your side. To be happy together again. I felt like I was dying inside all over again.

Who am I know? I do not have a clue. I feel nothing like the person I was when I was with my wife; strong, confident, always optimistic in any circumstance.

I don't understand what happened to the person i used to be. The person my wife fell in love with.

This is the hardest part for me. I am an electrical engineer and I have always relied on my mind and creativity. Now, even simple things seem incredibly difficult. I walk into the grocery store to buy groceries and leave with only bread and milk. I do not know what happened to me and I am even more afraid because I do not know how to fix it. Fixing things is what I'm supposed to be good at, but I can't fix this.

I don't even look the same anymore. I have many pictures of my wife and I throughout my home. I can see how happy I was in those pictures. I was shocked to see what I look like now in

comparison. I can hardly recognize myself when I look in the mirror.

I feel like I am alive but no longer part of life. I was never like this before. I am really thankful that you understand. It is so very difficult to explain to another unless they have known what

it is like to have the one person you love more than anything in this world taken away so unexpectedly.

Thank you and God bless.

My wife died, just two days after Valentine's Day.  I had proposed to her on Valentine's Day. 

Grief is not something I could figure out logically.  I went through all of the "what if" and "If only" and tried to figure out some way to blame myself for her death.  There are things out of our control and death is one of them. It took awhile, but it helps me to remember all of the good qualities, love, and compassion, my beloved wife, Rose Anne, shared with me.  She loved me just as I am warts and all. 

Your thoughts and feelings are all normal and similar to what I and several others have gone through. Grief is another form of love expression for your beloved wife.  None of us were prepared for this journey when we had to suddenly deal with it.  Thankfully, this is a safe haven to express these thoughts, feelings, and learn how to deal with them. - Shalom

Johnny,

I completely understand your post and devastating pain and grief.  I found this special place where people understand this side of grief.  Those of us who are left behind to stay and live without your beloved spouse. I was in Shock and AWE for quite awhile.  I came here to listen, learn, and find out how to cope, manage, and deal with all of this!  I came home from work to find my beloved wife dead.  No warning.  Sudden loss.  

This place listened to my story, share my pain, and comforted me.  This is not something we get over and just move on.  Few people truly understand this grief and pain.  We are blessed to have MartyT, who helps us along with many others here.  This place helped me in this deepest and darkest time.  I couldm't sleep, couldn't eat, and had trouble just breathing at times.  Seek a grief counselor or pastor that understands what you are going through.  Please know that we understand, know, and care about you. 

My wife died four years ago, and I still deal with this grief and healing every day.  We are all here to listen, help, share, learn, and be there for each other.  As Mitch said, do your best to take care of yourself.  This grief/loss takes a lot of energy and you will need to be kind to yourself.  Thank you for sharing with us.  I will begin praying and interceding for you.  Please come back often and share whatever you feel you need. I find it helpful to get those swirling thoughts written down so I can sort them out.  - George - Shalom

11 hours ago, TomPB said:

Right, sometimes I play the game or just say nothing, sometimes I don't. I think Whole Foods cashiers are trained to say "how are you" since every one does. Annoying.

In my feistier moments, i will answer, "Do you REALLY want to know or are you just being polite?

I find it is a habit, just like a handshake or nod.  There is usually no real meaning or intent behind it.  - Shalom

Yesterday, I went to a funeral/praise service of a longtime friend.  I caught up with several people that i haven't seen in a long time. I prefer to not go to them but I do to honor and respect the family. I was not triggered by grief or the great quantities of treats that I used to eat.  It was just about gathering with friends and listening to each other.  It was a peaceful and solemn day. - Shalom

On 3/11/2019 at 2:20 PM, Dewayne said:

My name is dewayne. I lost my wife of 28 years to complications from diabetes in September of 2018 so it has been just under 6 months and I think I’m getting worse. My 1st mistake was this guy I know said he had something that would make me feel better, some loratabs. So I started taking somewhere and there and it made the pain go away as long as I had them. But now I’m trying to quit them and I’m dealing with the withdrawals from that and all the old pain I never dealt with is still with me. I don’t know how much longer I can fight. I loved her so much.

Dewayne,

My wife of 25 years also passed away from complications of diabetes.  I comprehend and empathize with your pain and grief.  My wife died four years ago (February 16, 2015).  I was in SHOCK and AWE for a very long time.  This group was instrumental in helping me understand and deal with this grief by  listening, caring, and sharing. You are welcome to look up my posts, Shock and Awe, because, like you, I was trying  to make sense out of it.  We were inseparable until that fateful day. Deep love results in deep grief for the surviving partner (US).  You, me, and everyone who comes here. Welcome to our family.  - George  - Shalom 

8 hours ago, kayc said:

Wow, sometimes it goes to show what a small world this is!  I've never seen a pod-cast, don't even know what you get them on, goes to show how old I am and how far behind tech-wise.  But I know you, you can do anything you set out to do!

Podcasts are audio episodes about various topics.  I have a smart phone. the app is iTunes.  And i listen to about 10 different shows with a variety of topics.  You can also view many of them on YouTube and learn just about anything you want to learn.  KETO, Weight resistance training, Comic (Chad Prather), Two KetoDudes, Dave Ramsey, Clark Howard, etc...  Thanks.  😎 - Shalom

Thank you. kayc.  I went to my  chiropractor for an adjustment and he is so amazed at my progress. I have been seeing him for ten years.  He tells me I need to write a book? 

Then he tells me about this guy he helped twenty years ago and how now he is a successful pod-caster, publisher , and great generous guy.  Small world.  Come to find out I found his work early on this KETO journey and follow his work, listen to his podcasts. We have met several times and his genuine.  

My prayers are being answered with an increasing workload. Amen. - Shalom