Tachi

We are 40s today and a slow warmup through the enxt week. Hope your snow is reasonable. I was able to signup for the lab andview the results of my bloodwork. The alkaline phophatase went back down to where it was before the surgery. The other two liver numbers went way up. According to what I read they are now mildly elevated. There is another enzyme from the liver (GGT) which i didnt find on previous tests and its way over the high point of normal. The ast and alt which continued up are even with each other. Supposedly the relationship between the two may indicate the problem. The fact that they are 1 for 1 denotes fatty liver disease or liver damage. That the alkaline phosphatase went down I'll take as a good sign. But will continue to be mystified in all this and hope for good news next Friday. As well as confused by my mortgage. I owed over 3k in property taxes last year. I had called the mortgage company asking if I could just pay a lumo sum. But they were already set to pay the shortfall themselves and said the mortgage would be evaluated in Feb and that shortfall would be applied as well as the amount it went up. I estimated a 7300 dollar annual increase for the mortgage. But I had money set aside to cover that. Except I got the mortgage statement today for March and it doesnt change. No idea what theyre doing. IF the mortgage stays the same I can use the saved money for mortgage and keep my SS for myself. I'm betting I'll get a big increase out of the blue though. here's my numbers, blood test in Nov, late Dec and this week Alkaline phosphatase from 145 to 195 to 148 ast from 28 to 63 to 153 alt from 27 to 66 to 147 GGT high should be 65 and its 182, was not on other tests. AFP cancer marker is mid-range normal I guess the determining factor will be the ultrasound. Anyway, we shall see. Take good care and stay warm.

Rain and thunder. Two inches in two days, most of it since last night. Loud and constant thunder too. Seems to have passed by now. Thank you. I have a hard time thinking I have somethking bad. I feel better than i have in a long time. Except my shoulder. Had to lay on my side for the ultrasound and it wrenched it, on the heating pad. Hope all is well there, stay warm.

They did the ultrasound, just didnt mention it to the GI doc. Hurt my shoulder worse yesterday, silly me. Had to lay on that side for part of the ultrasound so maybe that was it. staying home for the day and putting the heating pad on it. I think my pcp was mad at me so she threw me to the GI and didnt do it right. I dont know how to do this stuff and need clear explanation. They have a lab at the PCP's office and could have done it there. Will do bloodwork tomorrow.

Thanks Marty. The GI doc is a very nice older man. Unfortunately Pcp didnt communicate anything to him, Ultrasound got delayed and Pcp didnt tell me to do bloodwork for him before appt. Will see him again next week and hopefully get good news.

Wish me luck. Ultrasound and GI doc tomorrow, the process begins. I'm wishing its fatty liver, they diagnose it from the ultrasound and maybe another imaging, I change my diet and they leave me alone. But I'm usually not that lucky. We were in the 60s today. Wish I could send you folks some milder weather. I always find amusement in how much our long range weather forecasts change. Its always changing thanks to storms moving slower and rain seems to go around us. Praying for Mike and the family and for you too. Seems alot came on him so fast. Really dont know what to say. Whats odd to me is the liver numbers shot up after surgery. I hadnt had alcohol for probably 8 months. Wasnt eating perfectly but was cleaner than I'd been in a long time. maybe it got a head of steam and isnt slowing down. The docs may stop helping me, oh well. I need to clean house and go through things. After I see what I have I can plan better the estate sale. Hope you get some rest. take good care of yourself, and Panther, and Kodie.

I cant believe what's happened to Mike. So shocking. Know that you folks are in my prayers. Crazy he seemed fine and then so much. I guess we never know. I doubt my ultrasound tech would tell me, my luck never runs that way. No idea who is handling this, my doc or the GI doc. Or do they call me at home. I read that if the liver on the ultrasound is a lighter color its fatty liver. dark spots can be cancer or non-cancerous. There are other imaging tests to do. Your temps are dangerous, that would panic everyone here. We finally hit 33 today. Will be back in 20s tonight but then warm up. Its raining now but if we make it through the night we're ok. Panther's a smart cat. I guess he sensed the heat or maybe he has hid in them before. I guess whatever is wrong with me it isnt far along cause i feel fine. Will find out in a couple weeks and hopefully get it fixed. I'm betting my doc will find/want to do more. After this is fixed thats all for now. We had a swarm of birds today. They were massing in my neighbors yard with a few in my yard. Couldnt tell what kind but they were finding something on the grass. maybe they hadnt been out for a few days. Well I think we survived. Its stopped raining, will be cold tonight and then warm up through the weekend. Wish I could send some of that your way. take good care and stay warm.

Was just curious if they did anything past the ultrasound. Hoping and praying it stops there. i dont want any spots on the ultrasound that might indicate cancer and lead to biopsies. What i had read of fatty liver was changing nutrition and exercise...which I'm doing anyway. I read there's no medication for fatty liver anyway so maybe thats best case scenario. We have a layer of ice on everything, 26 all day. Schools all closed, city offices, the whole deal. North of here it was far worse so we got lucky. Tomorrow supposed to ice or sleet all day into thursday when it gets above freezing. They said tomorrow will be the worst day. I rescheduled my Ultrasound for monday. Will have Ultrasound then GI Doctor in the afternoon late. I stayed in today and will do so tomorrow. The funny thing is yo folks get much worse. But for us this is a winter storm. Some people, ok probably alot, don't know how to drive on this and should stay home. nope, they're out driving around. I didnt even go to the curb and get my empty trashcan from yesterday. maybe do that tomorrow. I had read and head several places about meds. They put out a thick book that lists all conditions and the preferred treatmnt. The pharmacy companies pay big money under the table to get their drugs listed as the preferred treatment. But no one tells you about the side effects. My best friend became diabetic in his late 30s. The doc put him on a med. he researched it and started seeing on the news that people were dieing from that drug. So he called his doc and asked for a different med, doc refused, so he threatened to get a new doc. Then the doc changed his med. He manages it and does fairly well, though he could do better. he breaks down and eats fast food sometimes, feels bad, then cooks and feels better. I think I just want the docs to leave me alone. I'd rather live normally w/out alot of meds and let my life naturally end. better than having those meds eat up my health and cause my death. I bet Panther will be fine. He's survived pretty well so far. he has a thick coat of fat it sounds like, as well as fur. I wonder about the birds. The birdbath is frozen over and the seed (even though they dont eat it) is probably frozen. Where do they get water? Sometimes i wonder if the doctors really know much. Or do they just read numbers from a blood test and tell you what you have, treat it, and you never know for sure. Take good care of yourself, you folks stay warm.

Rain/ice/snow or whatever supposed to start at 1 tomorrow afternoon and go off and on thru Thursday. temps around freezing so no telling what form it takes. I bet yours will be much worse. Stay warm. Panther is fat because he wants to show you what a good job you do feeding him. Or maybe wild cats just never lose that instinct to eat all they can. Or maybe he swallowed another cat whole. You're right, there's no going back, there's no starting over or changing anything, there's only acceptance. And coming to peace with Life. My insecurities make me want to control everything in my life. And because I cant i get anxiety and frustration. But, I have to learn to do what can about what I can affect and let the rest go. That's my lesson. So, by the ultrasound alond they could tell you had cirrhosis? What did they suggest to treat it? Were you on keto at the time or how soon after did you start keto? I drank heavy in college...liquor mostly. I switched to beer after college and drank a sixpack most days til 2014 when i moved home. Then switched to 2 a day. Not proud of that, it was pretty stupid. I have no way of knowing but maybe thats what i have, or maybe fatty liver. I will be on pins and needles to see the GI guy and hope he doesnt just want to do every test in the book. But look at the ultrasound and tell me what i have. When i read fat panther I got on Youtube and looked at videos of fatcats. they can be pretty agile for big furry balls of fun. https://www.youtube.com/shorts/QDqyKj-3b9o here's one lol. Did you get alot of snow? Take good care and stay warm.

I cannot find words to express my depth and breadth of despair in the medical field. That I seem to keep getting pulled back in terrifies me. I remember dad was in the hospital they would put me in. The nurses left him on a pad and he went to the bathroom and sat in it. I tried everything short of calling the director and the nurses would just bs me. I even brought diapers and they lied saying they would use them. I know i have the right to leave but may not be able to. God help me if i have to go in again. The hospital I was in for my last surgery was same network but different location and I was treated very well. My eyes have been opened these past few years and I trust none of what has been accepted as true in medicine or nutrition. What we once laughed at as conspiracy theories have been found true. Often the cure is worse than the disease, esp when, like me, you only have yourself to take care of you. We're supposed to get cold and rain/ice/snow Tues/Wed. Hopefully I can make it to the Ultrasound ...IF they hear on the insurance. We all grieve in our own way and time and no one has the right to say a word except to listen and show compassion. I guess some people just need to be right at others' expense. I've tried a few times to tell younger folks that what they talk bad about the elderly is where they'll be eventually. Falls on deaf ears. People always plateau, they think how things are at that moment is how they will always be. We are always changing and always falling apart. After so many years things break down. When I think of how society gets us to eat and drink its a crime. All that sugar if nothing else is criminal. The drug companies make out like a bandit. I have a bad habit of anxiety and of curling up in my shell and waiting for the trouble to pass. I need to learn to use that troubled time as well as the good time. To let go the anxiety and do what I can then forget it. I dont think we ever 'get over' losing someone who is such a part of us. Maybe we just learn to deal with it and keep going. Gee wiz, I had sent my brother pics of items he was interested in asking if he wants them and I get no answers. If he's not carefull he will miss out and be mad. If I am very sick then I'll get the estate done as fast as possible so its done and secure. Else Will keep working on it as well as studying. Poor kodie, hope he gets used to it. He and panther sound like a pair. You could place a webcam where people can watch them. I almost did that for our birds when we had them. I know the cost of chicken sure has gone up, and yes eggs as well. I gave up on beef other than hamburger. Before I moved I'd open the doors and windows when it rained. Beautiful weather. I hope my next place has somewhere I can sit and watch it rain. The perfect place I think would be a small renthouse with a porch. I fear the worst but hope for the best. Which is probably fatty Liver Disease...which I believe is treated by diet and exercise. Of course worst case is cancer. last thing I want is the hospital again. I would take a shorter life with better quality over longer life with lesser quality any day. Kinda on hold with everything til I find out whats wrong. I best stop that and start getting the house ready. It may take a month or so to see whats wrong. I was thinking I'd get a bunch of Morning Glory and Pumpkin seeds, clean the flower beds and just throw down a bunch of seed. Maybe by end of summer it would look nice enough to sell. Sadly Life doesnt go as we planned. We just have to do our best and hope for the best. This may not be any consolation, but you married a very good man and had some good years together. One day you will be together again and for all eternity. Take good care of yourself and the animals. Hoping the weather is mild and life is quiet.

I told my doctor I need to get my strength back before moving on and was ignored. This whole prostate deal took me down a couple notches.Besides everything else I sat in bed four months. If one keeps going through medical fights one after another they wear down. I know this is hard for people to understand. But the only good years I may have left will be as long as the money from selling the house lasts. I wont get hired in a meaningful way that i can support myself. No matter what my brother thinks. So after that house money runs out I will be in a difficult spot. I'll just have to take whatever job I can get and hope they dont cut SS. So I figure the next 5 years is about it anyway. I dont care to have a pile of medical debt, plus there's no one to take care of me and I sure cant afford livein help. Had to reschedule the ultrasound to next week because they hadnt run the Ins yet or the Ins hadnt come back yet. I dont trust doctors anymore. For many reasons. I just dont want to be in the system and always thinking/wondering about the next step. For something so important it sure is slow. We got cold, we didnt get squat for rain, we seldom do. I think I need a playdate, so I can eat/drink/pee/stretch my legs. I drew up a simple exercise plan and now I need to start doing it...slowly and carefully. But I can tell the loss of muscle and tone from this prostate deal. I'm considering how to get rid/sell some of the estate things before the sale. There are companies that buy cassettes and dvd movies. And a place that buys old collectibles if they like them. I need to send them some pictures. Mom had so many collectibles and alot of nice things. Some of what they had are as old as me if not older. My great aunt and uncle gave them some things. My main problem is not knowing how much anything is worth. I've tried Googling but that hasnt worked very well. What I would love is for someone to come in and buy all the books and cassettes etc, and someone get all the collectibles. And my brother STILL hasnt replied to the pics of the items he is inerested in. he's going to be mad when they get sold and he never replied. I also need to talke that expensive ring down to Mom's old jeweller and see if they can tell me the worth at sale and how to sell it. Its funny how I will be doing fine and then suddenly have a memory of my folks or of my life...as clear as day...and then I get lost for awhile. I'm going to write down the doctors and have a look when I can. Considering what docs have been saying about nutrition the past 50 years, how wrong theyve been, and how they allow the food companies to do awful things...the establishment has no credibility with me. Same with my doctors. I will have to understand and decide. Panther likes Kodie because he has a tail like he does maybe. Or they speak a similar language. All my life I never understood. I still dont. But I am faced with some realities that had been there all along and I ignored. I can no longer ignore them. I consider that my life has changed and will never be good or fun again. All I can do is to pray for health and getting by. What I had thought the latter years would be is nothing like what they have become. I used to think I understood some things. And because I am a fearful person inside and have no confidence I tell myself I know and understand. I dont know squat and understand less. Life seemed it would go on forever. That nice comfy reality that has now vanished. As if it never was. Everyone goes through it. But no one talks about it. It did rain a little bit. It was comforting yet sad. Because it reminded me of my folks. Dad's den has a skylight and rain makes a pattering sound. dad would always be in his den working on a model plane. I hate how his last few years played out, he didnt deserve that. I wonder many things about that time, but its over. And Mom was always in the kitchen and the rain would make a metallic sound on the vent on the roof and would sound down through the vent. I have always loved the rain and always will. The weird thing for me is thinking I may never regain my health again. And this entire time the clock is ticking on the estate. Gee wiz, listen to me going on. Take good care of yourself and stay warm. It will come Spring one day.

Thx for the recipe, will get the ingerdients next time am at the store. I have an appt with the GI doctor Feb6. Havent heard from the ultrasound people to see if theyve gotten the referral yet so will call them tomorrow. We should have done a blood test or two to see if its liver ir gall bladder or something else. The newer blood test results point to liver. And my PCP mentioned it then suggested i see the GI doc, wich is why I think she's mad at me. We could have already done the liver function blood test. Anyway. Supposedly the ultrasound will give first indication of cancer or if the liver is inflamed or swollen. If anything shows up supposedly we would have the liver function test also...and have an MRI or CT scan and get better look. If the GI doc thinks something is there then I guess we do a biopsy and test for cancer. Theyre going slow for wanting me to do what they wish. At this rate it will take months just to find out. I'm thinking I'll at least get the house and yard ready and have the estate sale. They can do their medical stuff around that. You have to have your coffee. I'm having instant done weak. It hasnt upset my system yet so far so good. My brother doesnt understand it but I wont take much away from here when I go. So I understand. Their old bigscreen TV is about it. I just dont care to lug a bunch of furniture around, dont need the prints and although Mom had some really nice glassware and collectibles I dont know what I'd do with it. There was a certain artistry in older things that I love. But I just dont know what I'd do with it. It is very strange to see the house so different than my memories show me. I think I will like it better after the estate sale. We have gotten colder although not as cold as you. Twenties is more than cold enough. We are supposed to rain all day tomorrow and 40s or 50s, snow possible just north of us. I'm staying in and working on the houe and studying. It's funny. I dont have that huge prostate anymore so I considered getting a 6-pack of ale. But then I consider I probably have Liver issues. And whatever was making me sick a year ago may still be there. I still want a doc to tell me why coffee and ale were messing up my prostate or bladder or whatever. Good you can cook. At least you wont starve. I guess Panther could have hunted something up Probably take some time to come all the way back. maybe a warm epsom salt soak for that hand would help. We used to have a good doctor when we moved here, Doctor Golden. A good doctor and a good man. he would sit down and ask how life was going and listen. When I started my divorce he did that and it made a difference. he cared about us. I've read that liver cancer is hard to beat. Bone cacer much better to beat. Could be fatty liver disease or a alcohol related liver disease. I wouldnt think Id ever drank enough to get cirhosis (sp?) but who knows. Some come on suddenly and in 4-6 months you're gone. Some you have no indication until it's too late. So I understand and share your concern. If it turns out I have something bad then I'll have the house deed redone to a Ladybird Deed so my brother gets the house should I pass. What I'm tring to do is understand that at the moment I'm doing all I can do and worrying wont change it. I am aware of what may come but trying not to think the worst. I will do what I can but will finish the estate no matter what comes. Your weather would make me hibernate lol. I was born in Chicago and have always loved the cold. But these days i want to be wrapped in blankets lol. I even found Dad's old electric blanket to start off sleeping with. I run it for an hour so its nice and warm. Just a thought, my pcp is so concened, commented on my diet yet never offered direction on it. This is why I dont want to be in the system and never want to be in the hospital again. Oh, had a family of Robins at the birdbath today. I went and put the seed out for them but they never came back. Guess I scared em. Think I'll make some warm tea. take good care of yourself nand stay warm.

Houses are crazy responsibility. If I were staying I would be one emergency away from bankruptcy. I wish I'd been smart and finished the estate. Now I'll have to either do it along with healthcare etc or postpone health stuff once we figure out whats wrong. Your brother is such a good man. Thats alot of work for so little compensation. But I understand where he's coming from. I wont get a penny from all the work I've put in the past 5 years and dont want it, just my fair share. I sent my bro pics of the items he had an interest in and have yet to hear from him. When I'm ready he wont be and will want me to wait and thats not going to happen. Sounds like she did have some treasures. I hope someone can use and enjoy them. It can be very sad here, too many memories. But thats the price we pay for love. Neither medical place had gotten the referrals so i called. The GI doc called back yesterday all set. No word from the ultrasound place. I had to email a copy to their HQ. I dont trust anyone in the medical field. What I dont want is for the GI doctor to want to do things just because they havent been done. He should only do what is pertinent to the alkaine phosphatase numbers. I'll talk to my Ins company and try and find out what they should be charging me. Cant get in to the GI doc til Feb6, so chances ae tis will be a long ordeal. I will start in on the estate stuff next week. I will ride this out until they tell me whats wrong or timegets shrt and then they have to wait. I wont let myself go broke and lose the house. Thats all I have in this world. Too bad I cant sell the house furnished. Did they send the right coffee basket? Been crossing my fingers. Hows the hand? Looked at the flower beds and what a mess. I need to go rip out the old dead plants and weed it but not happening yet. Thinking of setting in some morning glory seeds and lots of pumpkins. Their flowers are gorgeous. I cant believe we are so far into January already. Our weather is mild and very nice. But you can bet next month it will get bad. The entire time I had the catheter and had the stitches I avoided showers. they seemed dangerous and difficult. But finally overcame that mental block and took a normal shower. It felt good. I will say thank you for caring. All through this it has been very difficult for me. Not knowing whats going on and being by myself. You and my best friend 6 hours away are the only people to ask how I was holding up and expressing concern for me mentally as well as physically. None of my health providers cared or recognized how difficult this has been. I guess this is what its come to. An assembly line. When i told my doctor I needed to finish dad's estate she didnt respect me at all. She doesnt care that if I dont finish it by years end I will either go broke paying for the house or lose it. Not to mention the moral responsibility involved. Way I see it even if it harms my health I will finish this estate. Maybe one day all tese battles will be over and I can have some peace for a change. Doubt it though. Rereading what you wrote about that house. Too bad we didnt get to take advantage of our houses. Times have been crazy. Somehow I dont see values going back up again. Do you ever tell Kodie a bedtime story? I bet you could tell him any story and he'd give you his full attention. Have you ever tried singing to them? Or playing music? I've always wondered if animals have a preference in music. Take good care of yourself and the kids there. Hoping you have some mild weather and some peace and quiet.

Some of the comments were weird, about the place suggesting they pay a cash price instead of insurance. And then getting billed for more. I wonder if my Ins company can tell me how much they will cover and what a reasonable charge is. Talked to a lady at my docs office and asked bout the referral. The doc sets up a blank one and th company has a referral servicethat picks one. She suggested I call and ask for one near me, which I did. The lady at the referral office set one up 5 minutes away. Later I called them and the ultrasound place and neither knew what i was talking about. One said call back in a couple days and the other asked me to email the referral to their referral email. Then i get an email from my doctor letting me know who the GI doctor was, which i knew. They scare me because theyre a joke. I think I have a good doc and I like her but I dont feel like i'm in good hands and I trust none of them. People at that office have lied to me before and they have misdiagnosed dad once or twice. So if no one calls me Ill call both places friday. I dont mean to sound odd but I dont think all this will end well. Sounds like your brother is a good man. And he did a great job with things. I admit i dont understand what houses are worth but have heard prices are crazy and houses in demand in certain places. Guess it just depends on the demand. Whoever does this estate sale will need to understand that whatever doesnt sell stays here, no freebies. They already make out like bandits. I dont trust em with that half off on the last day. People could just wait and they can wait to see whats cheap and buy it all up. Tbh this scares the hell outa me. Things keep going through my head and theyre all bad. Yep am in Texas, over dallas and Ft Worth way. We get 70s again tomorrow and then winter shows up. But no rain. They talk about february being a rough month but I'm hoping it stays warm. I kinda have the feeling the cause of my numbers wont be easily found. So they'll try everything in the book and will finally get it right, after theyve put me through the ringer. One thing I wonder. I had an ultrasound and MRI dne on my prostate, I wonder if that would show other organs and they should have a look? Oh my, the coffee basket is a mess. Companies just have no clue anymore. What ever happened to customer service and making the customer happy. I dont think there's a company i trust anymore. Im sending my bro two boxes of sentimental stuff and a nice thick family history. I'm paying the postage because I want him to have them and he does send 100 bucks each month that i sepnd on food. He will probably expect me to pay postage on anything he wants but he is sadly mistaken. Oh well. I hope the rest of the week goes well for you folks. take good care, scratch kodie behind the ear for me and toss panther some cat toys.

Dish knows they have you over a barrel. Companies dont care anymore. We exist to give them money. Glad you figured it out tho. It seems with tech now they try and make it easier but it just messes it up. they have too many features thinking that makes it better. Making it work easily makes it better. Hope your weather calms down and the snow waits. thats some crazy kind of weather. We were upper 70s today and tomorrow so I got a bit of yardwork done. Going to try and wash off the patio furniture tomorrow. They outsource customer service alot to India and my electric company...I dont know what theyve done but I just hope i dont have to call them ever again. First rule of CS is the customer has to be able to understand you. I'm waiting for a re referral to a GI doctor. The pdf they sent didnt have a name. Then i will call my Ins company and make sure the doc and the ultrasound company are covered and some idea how much they will run. The ultrasound place they referred me too has several comments online about shady billing and thats scary. Will see if the doctor sends a new referral tomorrow and if not will leave a message wednesday. Thank you for your kind words. On the one hand its weird that something is wrong because I feel fine. But best to catch it now. My concern is a medical system that runs wild and once they pull you in as an elder adult they just keep doing more and more. The way it is now they want to tell you nothing and just do what they want to do while you're in the dark with no say in the matter. They did this to my dad at the hospital they will want me to go in to. I will insist on being in the one where they did my surgery. Good staff there. Hopefully, if it is something it can be treated by meds and not mess me up with those meds. Tbh it scares the hell out of my anxiety. The not knowing, the fear more of what the doctors will do to me. No matter what this is I must finish the estate. If i go into a long bout in the hopsital i may not have a home to come back to let alone be able to pay my hospital bills. There is no one else to do it. I'll just have to do the best I can. I dont see it as the doc thinks its urgent or she wouldnt have waited til she got back from vacation to call me. But then i think she's washed her hands of me. I dont know if she or the GI doc is now running my care. Who will tell me what the ultrasound means. Etc. With my prostate I never knew if the MRI showed cancer or if the tissue test from surgery showed cancer, no one talked to me about physical rehab after surgery. My surgeon was a very nice guy but he dropped the ball. As far as data hacking goes, they always require all the info they can get but tey cant keep it safe. In one IT class we studied about that Target breech. They neglected some very basic priciples of IT security. I worked for Target for many years, havent and wont set foot in one ever. I took some pics of the estate stuff my brother expressed an interest in. And asked him if he wants it. I may not ever get an answer. he still wants the big stuff but doesnt want to pay for shipping. they dont have room for it anyway. i think if he ever got it he would just sell it and then say he didnt have room. I need to take that very nice ring to Moms old jewellers and see what its worth and if i can sell it. Hows the hand doing? hope you're still healing well. One day, eventually, it will warm up and be spring. take good care of yourself.

We are only focused on the liver/gall bladder now. Im tracking my sugar and its hard to stay under. But I will keep adjusting until I do. Read last night that too much sugar can hurt the liver. The Alkaline phosphatase is up from 145 to 190 and the ast and alt (I think) that also denote liver issues went up from mid twenties to 60s. So a marked increase. Doctor went on vacation so no one bothered to call me. She asked if i would come see her and also do an ultrasound. i explained that before we did alot I need to finish the estate. My feeling is very strong is that whatever may be wrong with me I must finish the estate before i were to get real sick or go into the hospital. So if I am going downhill fast i have to start the estate now. I also need to heal and gain strength. Her concern is that we need to see what this is and start working on it while its early. I see the point, she doesnt see mine. Anyway, she then said she would refer me to a GI doc and also an ultrasound. So I feel like i've offended her and she has washed her hands of me. But the referrals she sent didnt name a GI doctor so i cant do anything. I left a messge. That I've been told by another doctor is the next steps would be more bloodtests to check liver function and the ultrasound to look for swelling or signs of cancer. Then maybe more blood tests and if they think there could be cancer we do biopsies, which I dont want. Anyway, will take a few weeks i guess and in the meantime i can have all the anxiety i can handle. Tired of stress of health issues. I may be a fool but I still have a really hard time believing those numbers and that my liver/gall bladder have issues. How are your hands doing? hopefully still healing. I used to get VitE and snip the end of the capsules and put on wounds to heal. I remember when i was a kid i smashed my thumb and the doc soaked it in a clear fluid. Wish i knew what that was, it worked well. Ive become convinced doctors are more concerned with following a script than helping a patient. That's why I question everything. Doctors cant make you do anything but if you dont do what they ask they can drop you. Dish knows you're stuck so they dont care. maybe see if the unit has a serial or model number and Google it. Do they have anything on their website. thats the worst service in the world. How's your weather holding up? We're back to normal. high 50s and 60s and low 40s and 30s, seems way too warm. Do you have snow? At least my incisions have healed. Going to have a nice little scar on the front. I tried to lift some 8 pound handweights andwas fine but can tell I as weak as ive ever been. Which is why I need to take some time and get stronger. Does it seem to you that esp big companies dont care about customers anymore? They seem to think we exist for them. Too bad theres no one close to shovel snow for you. opefully it doesnt snow for awhile. I think this week I will throw a jacket on and go rake some leaves. And start working on checking whats inside the house and then cleaning. Need to get a box of things packed and off to my brother. He wont want them because theyre not worth alot of money. he still wants the expensive things but cant figure out how to ship them out there. Theyre heavy and/or big and will cost him an arm and a leg. plus they have no room. He's crazy. Take good care. hoping you get some warm temps and mild weather.

Diabetic...on the bloodwork right before my surgery the gluecose was at the upper limit. But my A1C1, which i've read and been told is what doctors use to diagnose diabetes is about in the middle. I think once things settle down for me and the new nutrition kicks in and I can get back to exercising again all those numbers will improve a bit. But my stress and anxiety wont go down until the estate is done and i have a new place to stay. I may be crazy (Iam, but thats beside the point) but the sore in my foot is better. The redness is mostly gone. It was very red in a ring around the initial wound with some faint black around the edge. But the red seems mostly gone and the dark area seems faded. The other side with wat looks like fluid under the skin with red on the edges is the same. I have an appt with a PA, and really dont want to go as theyre not very good. But I also dont want to get sepsis or anything. I consider that my using hydrogen peroxide slowed the healing alot, dumb idea. And perhaps being immobile most of the day etc has decreased my blood flow. Slower healing. Will see what it looks like in the morning. If it looks like its healing I'll cancel my appt and stay home. I have a big note on my calendar to sell 'as-is'. I cant afford to have that happen to me. My brother still hasnt decided what he wants to keep from the estate. Well, he kinda does but he doesnt want to pay shipping on it. Hows the burn? Tell the folks at Church I said you cant do anything til you heal. they should be taking better care of you. Wish we had some rain, nothing for us the next two weeks. But crazy enough we were 83 today and will hit 80 tomorrow. Supposed to be 50s to 70s the next two weeks. i keep hearing we are in a warm winter trend. I wont complain if we are mild all year. Good thing Kodie is a cold weather pup. I'd hate to think if you had a chihuahua or something. I've always heard that cats are like women. You cant understand em or tell em what to do. So I guess men are like dogs. cats definitely stay a bit wild I think. Sounds like they enjoy each other's company. Panther can probably sense how sweet kodie is. I think as we get farther along in life its easier to tweak small stuff. I know for me my muscles are out of shape and i've lost 25 pounds this past year so less cushion. We just have to be more careful I guess. Hoping your hands heal up well. And it doesnt get too cold or snow too much. It would be nice to have a few weeks of peace. Take good care.

Thanks ladies. Marty Hope you're doing well. Mt foot/ankle i think is infected. So will need to see the doc next week. that scares me because theyre just not very good there. I need to find a new one. I had small pain in the hospital and considered it just my compression sock doubling up and didnt worry. I kept the socks on when I got home. By the time I took them off to wash there was a blister. It had later burst I guess but I never saw evidence of anything coming out of it. It got red around it but showed no sign of puss or anything. Eventually it formed a scab but never healed. I started attending it nightly with warm compress and antibiotic ointment and a bandaid. Last night I left the bandaid off and the scab got knocked off. This morning I noticed what appears to be a small yellowish patch with some red on the sides. Its on the other side of the front tendon from the blister. Its where one side of the bandaid would always sit so no idea how long its been thre. I think that happened last night. Anyway, its probably a good idea to get it looked at. It doesnt hurt, isnt tender or hot. No fever or any indication anything is wrong. I keep hoping it will heal but if it is spreading then it needs attention. Today was my first day without the surgical binder. No idea if i should keep it on but since he freed me o restrictions I figured it was time. I may use it for awhile when I starte xercising. I wish you could meet my new neighbors. They come from China, where they lived in a 50 story highrise apt complex. Theyve never had a yard before. And I imagine they have never had so large a home. It must be such a joy for them. The previous owner had a big cactus garden in the front. These new folks removed all of it but the huge center cactus. Not sure what they want to do but one of the pther neighbors has been coachng them. I've seen no foundation problems but judging by my luck the past 5 years there will be a zinger or two. Sounds like your weather is worse than ours and harder to endure. We are going to be 40s to 60s and maybe 70 with no rain. When it hits 50s and 60s there's just a certain quality to the air, it smells and feels different and makes me think of a long lost home. I'm sure your tree works. Just be careful and get healed. The rest can wait. I've gotten to the point of not being a tough guy if i dont have to. I have no problem sitting on my butt and healing. Oh yea, that was my day today...and yesterday...and the day before, etc etc etc. The bad thing about sprains is i forget and then I tweak it. Two steps forward and one step back. Its healing though, i can feel it. My muscles are out of condition and have atrophied. I need to exercise and get strong again. Hows your hand coming along? My SS 'should' start wednesday. That will be eaten up for February bills for the house. Been making a point to go walk in the yard. I love plants and gardening. Part of me really wants one more summer here. I could justify it as time to fix up the yard and do a little work on the house. Plus i need to get someone to fix the sprinkler system. I think I am at the point where I can clean the house and go through the things. I think my brother wants to keep something of value. he gave up on the ring so then remembered some old antique elephants, then something made of crystal. He has vague memories and I'm supposed to find what he wants. I think he's grasping at straws. I may just take some pictures of thngs and email to him. have you considered getting one of those laser cat toys and play with kitty? I wonder if he would chase it or just not care. Please take good care of yourself. And Kodie and Panther. Interesting how Panther found you two and moved in. Guess it was fate. Hope you have some quiet peaceful days, stay warm.

I would politely refuse, and if they didnt respect that then impolitely refuse. let them know that you medically are unable and they dont need to ak. its their fault. Most people just dont care about others. Went through that at work so many times. But then i see that you understand. Take care of yourself because no one else will. When you get the new tree you should leave it up for a bit and see if kodie likes it. I have often wondered what dogs and cats think and feel about things like that. Do they appreciate the beauty. I sprained a shoulder. Ive noticed a loss of muscle and tone from doing nothing since august and wasnt great before. I lay on my side to use the laptop usually. I pushed myself up fast and the shoulder sprained. sigh, how goofy does it get? So I cant sit up for long, not supposed to sit on hard chairs. Cant type laying on the other side. Cant lay on the preferred side. So I'm stuck laying back and typing sideways. I've become too bony and need more muscle, time to rehab. My robins are still hanging around. I keep the water and seed going for them. 50s here and near freezing at night so cant complain. Maybe the robins are late moving south or just like the weather here. Sign of the times. Too many people wont do their jobs, even when others are in danger. I have read so many times about those breeds of dog arent dangerous. But how many times I have seen or read that rotts and pits go hostile. And some people take advantage of their nature and train/abuse them that way. One of my big fears is that there will be structural or foundation problems. I've done a walkaround and didnt see anything but then I'm not qualified. Still no word on my bloodtest so i think I'll just forget about it. Take good care, stay warm and scratch Kodie's belly for me.

How are your hands doing, the blisters any better? Should take it easy til they heal. And the weather wow. Just another winters day I guess. We were inseasonable warm today, 76. Going to get back to winter soon though. Your weather can really cause problems. Talked to my neighbor on the other side. he and his wife hadnt been home for two months. they are fine. But had both fell and were in the hospital then a home. Good to have them back, nice people. Healing slowly. Ive taken to loosening the binder when I'm laying down but use it when I move around. Want to be extra careful. I may hear about the blood test this week. Decided I definitely need to give myself til summer before I pursue it further. My doctor mya disown me and thats ok. May seek a second opinion. Altho I did post this on reddit and a verified doctor said he wouldnt worry about it. Amazon is almost worthless. their movie selection largely stinks. They offer more to stream that you have to pay for. I dont even use the music. But it has been a great advantage to order from them instead of trying to go shopping. Just have to be careful because there are so many items with badly increased prices. they are big enough they dont care. They can tolerate a certain amount of screwups. At the worst give people a gift card and theyre happy. I put the birdbath and feeder back up and the dove and small birds are using them. Even have a couple of robins. I hated taking it down but dont want to attract the rats. That last freeze really hurt the yard. There were worse freezes prior but that last one got some vines and small trees coming up from roots. Guess I dont need those anyway. I'm thinking I may try and stay one more summer and work on the yard. Not in any hurry to leave now. I have to heal and get strong and that will take more time than I had thought. Small things and short exertions make me tired. I think this is called starting at square one. If only Kodie could talk. I bet his tail wags all the time. He really does have a good home. Happy New Year, take good care of yourself and the critters.

When we have flowers we get some hummingbirds. Cool looking animals. I bet you enjoy watching them. I jug the birdfeeder up again. And put the nirdbath out. I took em down because i think the rats were nto it. But I miss the tiny birds that used to come. My abdomen is healing slowly. The scars seem to barely be healing. I know im old and my white bloodcell count is low but I'd like for it to heal up. I can at times feel it sore inside as well. So I decided its just going to take some more time. Hope you had a good time at son in law's. Bit of a drive but could be worse. They should visit you sometime. They should do something like a potroast. like our old dinners, everyone gathers around to eat and trades family stories etc. Ive never played mandolin before this one. before the operation I started learning but havent been able to sit up for very long. Even driving in the car I get sore. Church sounds fun. I bet that was alot of really fine food. Thats one thing young folks dont understand. The ladies at church can cook better than almost anyone. I went to the grocery store to get a med and bought some food. Fried chicken...which was tough...fried okra, which was greasy...and a slice of chocolate cake, which was dry and stale. The things I used to love and they were disgusting. Back to my nutrition. Good thing I love chicken and turkey. I gave another blood to test. Doc is looking for the alkaline phosphatase...its not high because of liver she thinks, maybe just was my huge prostate or bone disease or bone cancer. If this one is high I think we do another blood test to see exactly what it is. And thats all i will pursue. Dumb as it sounds I cant afford to get into a line of treatment and am not willing to get into an invasive anything. I need to heal and get strong. Besides, I dont think 5 weeks is long enough to recover from a huge prostate and super stress. Doc may give up on me but before anything i have to heal and get strong, finish dads estate and sell the house. I will suggest we test again this summer. Do you still have snow? How long before it warms up again? does it get colder next month? We hit 70 today and its going to be mild for a couple weeks. next month however through february it should be pretty cold. There goes my heating bill. Should be around $200 next month. Your weather sounds horrible. I dont miss it at all. At least you're safe where you are. Amazon has gone to pot. Theyre just so convenient and I get my money's worth on the free shipping. However, I dont use the music part and dont find much to watch on the movie etc service. I must be picky. Here's wishing you a Happy New Year. Hope you get to relax some and scratch kodie behind the ears. Take good care and stay warm.

Surgeon called today. I left a urine sample tuesday at our appt. he said it grew a little bit of stuff and altho normally he wouldnt worry about it, since I just had surgery he gave me 5 days of antibiotics just to be safe. I used to put vit e on my skin stuff. But thinking it just takes time. After all, you're a Mom so you have much more experience with this than I do. Very happy we're not getting snow etc, high today was 22. Tomorrow should hit 33 and then start warming up Sunday. I have no idea what God has left for me. I know i'm wrong but I wonder if there is anything at all. At this point i'm dreading my bloodtest lest they want to do more tests etc etc etc. I just want to be left alone at this point by all things medical. Heal and finish the estate and get on with life. Waitingand dreading the medical bills. Guess i'm not in a very festive mood. maybe I can work on that tomorrow. Actually I was surprised my foot hasnt urt much. It hurt more with the compression hose on. It still is red around the scab and is raised a bit but I'm saying it's healing. I guess Panther has adopted kodie as well. At least they get along. Panther can be the outside guy and kodie the inside/outside guy. Do you get lots of birds in your yard? Do you ever toss em old bread or anything? My folks always loved watching the birds. I had to take down the seed and birdbath because the rat family was using them. May put it back up anyway though. My neighbors called to check on me. Nice people. What are you doing Christmas day? I'm cooking a turkey roast and just relaxing. Considering taking off thru the end of the year and getting back into artwork and restarting mandolin. Stay warm and if I dont see ya before then Merry Christmas!

I never know about home testing devices. My scale is off and I suspect my BP meter is off, its giving me just under 120/80. I need a new one I guess. Been trying to get the surgical binder off and use the heating pad, then use it on my ankle/foot. I also do a warm washcloth. Its about the same. I wont get out in the coming cold so maybe I can do a virtual visit. I guess it will take a little time for your hand to heal. Wish they had something you could dip your hand in and take th heat out. hang in there, hopefully it heals soonest. How did the skin visit go? Did they freeze em off? I had read use vaseline over neosporin when reading about my foot. I use neosporin anyway. But honestly I think theyre right in my case. Whatever I put on it cant get inside so its too late for any antibacterial stuff. I think eventually I will need a doctor and they will probably cut it open again. Saw my surgeon today. He's a good man. I am off the meds, off restriction and see him again in 3 months. However, still very much healing the wound and incisions and still going to be very careful and take it slow. I have a dozen or so cake and brownie mixes that I no longer will make. Going to give em to my nextdoor neighbors. Your place is drafty then. Good thing you have a super stove. My rental in Lubbock before I moved home was drafty. It had an old under floor gas heater. never used it. It would heat the front room and the other two rooms and bathroom were ice. Yea i laughed when i figured out my glass held 3 and not 2 cups. my poor kidneys. Im trying to slow down and not overdrink. The sad thing is we have sorely earned so much more than we have or will ever get. I laugh at these kids because they have no clue. Even if someone tries to tell them whats coming they dont want to hear it. their cup is full and theres no more room. Wish i could redo life knowing what I know just so i could spend time and energy on what really matters. Sounds like you need someone reliable to go through the property and do some work. But I guess as long as the main building holds up you're ok. Thursday its supposed to be 50ish and sometime around noon drop into the 20s in about 90 minutes. be 9 that night and frigid until Sunday. Luckily no rain, ice, or snow is forecast. Waiting to see if we lose power anyway. We shouldnt. Im staying home. Scratch Kodie for me, and take good care. Hoping your hand gets healed soon.

Talked to my doctor online, but forgot to ask about my foot, so I hope its not infected. We talked about my bloodwork. The alkaline phosphatase is high and concerns her. Could be liver or gall bladder (altho she doesnt think so), could be bone disease, bone cancer, or as a result of my prostate stuff. Doing another bloodwork the 27th and go from there. We ruled out sweet breads, cakes pies etc. Unless I can make something w/ low/no sugar etc. Anyway, will be wondering if i have cancer until I find out. It never ends. I guess Panther is claiming his territory. Too bad that cant be directed. How is your hand doing. Hopefully that heals quick. Are you able to eat ok? My bro would tell you to just order pizzas. judging by the food he always suggests its a miracle he is still alive. he sent me a box of italian fruitcake, which I love. But lots of bad fats. I thought to just eat a tiny bit at a time but today the ingredients actually list cholesterol, so i trashed it. he either knows nothing of butrition or doesnt care. And your place holds together. And snow is mild. Life keeps moving. I think I would be happy if it hit a sweet spot and rested there for a bit. I've read this is a big problem for alot of young people. they think life is always good and quiet. So they have no esilience and cant handle adversity. Remember the old Charlie Brown cartoons? The way adults sounded? Thats how we sound to cats..."waaa? waaa wa wa waaa". We get a winter storm this week, Thursday night a low of 9 and then Friday a high of 24. It starts warming up Saturday and in the 50s and 60s the following week. No snow forecast but they say parts of Texas will be without power. it's amazing to me after that last bad storm how they havent fixed anything.What do we have to do? I have a half cord of firewood so will look at the fireplace after my appt Tuesday and make sure its ready to go. At least you dont use the shop. I guess it wont hurt anything unless the walls fall down? Your husband sounds like my Dad in a way. Loving to work on things and spend hours in the shop. Curious how thigs work. I didnt inherit exactly that. I am more like Mom. A creative imaginative soul. What I wonder is how I will survive working til my end. And 'if' I can work that long. But honestly, given the current state of my health that may not be a problem. Oddly, I am presently at peace. Had another lesson in Mortgages etc. There is a $3600 shortage on property taxes. I saved 7400 for it plus emergency. But the mortgage company paid it in full and will add the amount I owe them to next years mortgage plus use the new property tax amount...which raises the mortgage payment by $660...about an extra 67% of thus years mortgage. So I will take my saved money and transfer it to the account that the mortgage is paid from and it should cover that amount. My SS will cover the rest of the house bills. I'm a bit frightened to see the medical bills and pray there's nothing else coming. I'm slowly running out of money. But i will fairly soon refuse to delve into anything else. there's no sense in being healthy just to be living on the sreet. Bloodwork again on the 27th. I can tell I'm healing inside and some issues have gone away. But the wound on my foot isnt healing or so it seems. The compression hose I guess was bunched cause it was uncomfortable in the hospital. It rubbed a blister which broke. there's a small bright red ring around it which isnt spreading. Doesnt hurt, isnt swollen or hot. I'm using a hot compress and then covering with neosporin. Was told to drink lots of water with that catheter etc. I have a set of large glasses that hold two cups each so was getting 4 a day at best. Finally did measure em and they hold over 3 cups. So I thought I as drinking 6-8 cups and was really drinking 9-12. Too much. Have slowed down and my bladder is healing i guess because its all heading to a more normal response. I have no idea how they make houses like yours, but it seems well insulated? Holds the heat well. I only use a couple rooms and wish I could close off some vents and close some doors but supposedly that can mess up the system. Jazzy is blessed to have you available.. Cool how things work sometimes. Well, going to take the trash out for tomorrow and make dinner. Turkey patty and some green veges. I think I have one more of the vegetable soup pack with okra and onion and peppers etc. take good care. I forget how cold it gets there. Keep warm. From the inside shot you posted your place looks in pretty good shape. I wonder what Panther will do after his current targets arec destroyed, maybe start on a tree.

Mandolin I had been thinking of getting myself one for christmas but mentioned to bro that i had to wait til I paid for medical. So he sent me the money to get one. He thinks I will play him a Christmas carol on Christmas. Wont happen. I cant even really sit up to play, let alone am able to get a clear note. Someday. The've confirmed a dozen tornadoes now. And we had one near me, scary. What I'm doing is a small breakfast when i wake up. I've found if I dont eat soon after waking up I have problems. then lunch around noon and dinner around six and no snacking in between. I dont really feel hungry anymore. I can feel my stomach if its empty and hear it growl but dont feel hungry. In the same vein I also have problems feeling full. I need to just be careful with how i fill the plate and say this is all i get. Watching a Randolph Scott western, he was one of dads favorite cowboys. good actor. The picture was fine. i can tell how beautiful things are and thats what counts. I agree on survival mode. You've certainly had your share. You deserve to have a few months of peace and quiet. For me I feel like life is just slowly spiraling downward. one thing after another. I am wondering now if I can come back from this and get in shape or if this is just the beginning of the end. We shall see. I think I need a cup of tea. I started having a cup of green tea every couple days, supposed to be good for me. Take care.