DaughterOfAnAmazingMom Posted January 26, 2019 Report Share Posted January 26, 2019 This forum was such a boon to me when my mom died all too soon of breast cancer several years ago. It was unbelievably helpful to join in on the chats in the parent forum because it was the only place I could find other 20-somethings who understood. I find myself facing this awful grief again, and I hope someone can relate. After my mom passed away, I ended up taking in our old family cat. She was 14 when Mom died and was closing in on 18 here before she died. She had lost a bit of weight recently, but her behavior was the same so it didn't really register. She seemed perfectly healthy otherwise. I got back from work Wednesday, and she did her usual scolding greeting that I had left her for the day and she hadn't had her dinner yet. Then she followed me around while I made dinner and sat with me in the living room while I ate. Nothing out of place. Then around midnight, she started yowling in fear, and I went to check on her. She was clearly having issues seeing and kept walking into stuff. Then she started having trouble moving. My boyfriend's old family cat suddenly died a few years back after showing the same symptoms. I was super scared but tried to sleep because I couldn't do anything until morning. After a while, her scared yowls really got to me, so I held her for hours until we could get in to the vet. I thought I'd have to put her down, but they said she was experiencing thyroid and kidney issues, which was totally treatable. They'd just keep her for a few days and get her started on the medication I'd need to give her. Fast forward to Friday morning, they called to say she'd died that night. I'm a whole mess of emotions for so many reasons. First, I wish I'd taken her in for a checkup or something so we'd caught this sooner.I was her person. That was my job. Second, I am absolutely heartbroken that she died without any of her people with her. We owed her that. Third, I was in junior high when we got the old kitty. We had just moved and I was having a very hard time adjusting. She helped me through it. She was my furry buddy in high school and breaks from college. I moved back in for a bit after college, and I was there when my mom got her terminal diagnosis. Stinky's loving companionship helped my sister and me through that. (Sister is 12 years younger than me) After Mom died, my old kitty became my roommate and was absolutely indispensable in helping me get through things. She'd been my furry roomie for several years at this point. She was unbelievably sweet and talkative and loved to be held. She followed me everywhere and chatted while she did. She definitely loved me in whichever way a cat can, and I loved her to bits and pieces. She just made my heart warm and made me feel so needed and loved. I just got back from running, which I made myself keep doing after my mom passed, too, and I'm just sitting here so sad because Stinky always greeted me at the door when I got back and followed me to my room to "help" me finish my workout. That generally included trying to sit on my feet while I did lunges or laying next to me while I planked like she was planking, too. Now, there's just a silent apartment and no faithful furry companion to join me. I'm just devastated looking at her empty kitty beds and toys, that she was using in a completely normal way just three days ago. My work let me take personal days Thursday and Friday, and I've basically just been crying in bed. I am absolutely broken-hearted and crying just as much as I did when I lost my mom. I was not expecting Stinky's ultimate death to impact me like this. It feels the same as when Mom passed. I basically lost the two "people" who loved me the most, and my heart feels like it's had a huge chunk removed again. 😕 I don't know if anyone will reply, but I just had to get it out there. My little furry support system since 2001 has been suddenly ripped out of my life, and I'm just left with a sad, empty apartment that used to reverberate with loud, loving kitty meows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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