How to move a relationship forward during grief?

[selena1988]

Hi there, 

I've been reading on this board for a few months after my brother, however, as (probably) expected, no situation is very similar to mine. I'll try to explain my situation, and hope that some of you can chip in with advice.

This posts concerns my boyfriend that unfortunately lost his beautiful mother way too soon.

I find myself asking how should I care for him? Should I avoid all practical discussions for the next couple of weeks, months, how long? 

 

Edited for privacy concerns.

 

[kayc]

I want to start by saying how sorry I am for your loss, and also how sorry I am that you find yourself in this situation.  This is a situation that is no one's fault, and it's more common than you'd realize.  I honestly wouldn't lay any demands or relationship talk while he is going through this or it could be the ending chink.  My fiance of a year broke up with me when his mom was dying, he was her caregiver 24/7 for a few months before she died.  It blindsided me.

http://www.griefhealingdiscussiongroups.com/index.php?/topic/5333-here-i-go-again/&page=1

 

 

[selena1988]

On 12/1/2020 at 6:15 PM, kayc said:

I want to start by saying how sorry I am for your loss, and also how sorry I am that you find yourself in this situation.  This is a situation that is no one's fault, and it's more common than you'd realize.  I honestly wouldn't lay any demands or relationship talk while he is going through this or it could be the ending chink.  My fiance of a year broke up with me when his mom was dying, he was her caregiver 24/7 for a few months before she died.  It blindsided me.

http://www.griefhealingdiscussiongroups.com/index.php?/topic/5333-here-i-go-again/&page=1

 

 

 

Edited for privacy reasons 

 

 

[kayc]

I'm glad he's showing you caring and love but sorry for how it's been going and that either of you finds yourself in this situation.  Very hard, esp. not being in your native country.  

[selena1988]

Edited for privacy concerns 

[kayc]

I never got an option in it, he sent me a breakup letter to my office via Fed Ex.  But for those who DO get to talk about it, here is one couple who has made it through the hump intact, inspiring!

[kayc]

Did not turn out after all. 

 

 

[selena1988]

On 11/30/2020 at 10:27 PM, selena1988 said:

Hi there, 

I've been reading on this board for a few months after my brother, however, as (probably) expected, no situation is very similar to mine. I'll try to explain my situation, and hope that some of you can chip in with advice.

This posts concerns my boyfriend that unfortunately lost his beautiful mother way too soon.

I find myself asking how should I care for him? Should I avoid all practical discussions for the next couple of weeks, months, how long? 

 

Edited for privacy reasons.

 

I made an edited version instead.