Behaviours

[walter/Erica]

It is my sons 25th birthdya today. I am feeling incredibly, sad, depressed. I have this deep ache and gap in my herat. When I feel like this all I want to do is be left alone and find something that will detract from this feeling. I Pray that God will pull me and the children thru today.

A fiend of mine mentioned that we should try not to get stuck on the past, but look forward to a future with them ( our loved ones who have passed on). I pray that this future will be soon. i really cannot bear this sustained continuous pain that i am in for most of the time. I pray that God will be merciful to me and draw me and the children preciously close to Him now

[LoriS.]

I am sorry that you are in such a terrible state. I have a 25 year old daughter...I can't imagine my life without her. I wish you the peace that you are looking for. Again, I am so sorry.

Take care...Lori

[walter/Erica]

Hi Lori

A little correction, Its my darling Husband , Walter I am mourning, my son is still alive, but his birthday triggered off missing my late husband who died just under 6 months ago

Love, Erica

[shell]

Erica,

Six months (in grief time) is a very short time. Your feelings are normal and it will take a long time to start feeling anything but sadness. I'm so sorry for your loss. But please believe that things will get easier as more time goes by. The pain will never leave, you will just learn how to live with it and go on. You have more life ahead of you and your children do too. It will be a "new" life, but it can be ok. I would guess that your husband is hoping that all of you are ok and will get on with life without him. That you will find strength together and help each other through this terrible time. As painful as it is, hang in there and face your pain and it will get easier, I promise.

A big hug to you and the rest of your family,

Shell

[walter/Erica]

Dear Shell

Thank you for your kind words. How do I face my grief ? How do I do my actual grief work and what is that? Please give me some pointers. I am probably doing alot of it already, but it would ber great to know if I am on the right track

Love, Erica

[MartyT]

Erica, dear, you may find these threads helpful and informative:

The Hard Work of Grief

Wondering Where the Light Is

[LoriS.]

I'm sorry Erica. It sounded like it was your son. I am so sorry about your husband.

Take care...Lori

[shell]

Erica,

The threads that Marty gave you can give you a lot of tips. The only advice I can give you is to feel what you are feeling, don't run away from your feelings, and cry as much as you want. As they always say, you have to go "through" grief, you can't go around it. Read as much as you can about the grieving process. It lets you know that what you are experiencing is normal and that helps a lot! And, of course, please continue to post here and let us know how you're doing, ask questions, vent...whatever you need to do.

Hugs,

Shell