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It has been less than two months since my husband's sudden death. Joe loved Thanksgiving and Christmas. I have been in a tail spin since Saturday. I think the reality is setting in and the shock is wearing off. Anger, anxiety, and a deeper sense of what is lost is now here. I spoke with a Personal Coach yesterday on the phone who worked with some of the 9/11 Widows. She was referred by a friend in Southern California. Her husband died very young and I felt a connection with her that I have not felt with other grief counselors. I think it is very important for me to reach out and find trained people to talk to and read. I have a few wonderful books on Grieving that I found on Amazon, and I read them often. This may help all of you as well.

Someone told me that I will never be "Linda" as I have known Linda again. That is okay with me as long as I was able to share a portion of my life with Joe. If I have to transform and adapt due to this tragedy, in time I hope I will accept that change. Every counselor has suggested that I set my own boundaries during the Holidays. Keep it simple and make sure that we take care of ourselves.

Tomorrow will be very difficult for all of us. I pray that God holds us all close.

-Linda G

Edited by MartyT
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Linda, The best thing I can share with you about the holidays is take care of yourself, don't push or get pushed into things you are not ready to do. Rest. You have no idea the amount of energy it takes grieving, much less the holidays. Be kind to yourself during this time. It is not easy, this season, but you can do it and I wish for you some comfort during tomorrow. Deborah

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It sounds like you have received some very good advice. My heart and prayers are with you and all my friends here from the States; thankfully, we have already gone through Thanksgiving up here in Canada.



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It is my first Thanksgiving without my Scott and you are so right. I will never be the same. My daily chore is to find out who I am now and how to go on without the love of my life and my very best friend. We were so so close, we had so many traditions and were at the wonderful place in our lives where our sons were getting older and we found each other all over again. We actually loved each others company! This is a very painful time without all our best friends. I am so happy that I found out this site to help me through this process.


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