Seven Months On Friday The 13Th

[Queeniemary]

Life is going on....does not seem possible. Yesterday Michael has been gone 7 months, and our oldest GreatGrandchild turned 3. I seem to be managing all right, I am trying to move forward, but sometimes, it still hits me in the gut and I just almost have to double over. Will I ever stop missing him so much. There is not a day passes that I don't think of him, and wish he was still here. I will say that the shock of his death has diminished somewhat, but there is still a big hole in my life that only he could fill. I fell in love with him the first time I met him. He had just moved to this area, and a friend had encouraged him to come to a Theatre Company audition. I happened to be the assistant director on that production. He had never been on stage before, but he was a natural, and went on to become the best actor in our Theatre Company. He also worked as Earthquake McGoon, at Dogpatch USA, for those of you that might remember that theme park, based on Al Capps comic strip. Over the next 25 years, he acted, directed, and we were together in many plays, acting or directing. One of my favorites was "Fiddler on the Roof", where he played Tevia and I played Golda. We sang the "Do you Love Me" song from that musical at many functions. I am still very involved in theater, but it is just not the same without him. Thanks for letting me ramble, I am missing him so very much today...I am putting together a scrap book for the Arts Council, and there are so many pictures and articles about him, in various roles. Done a lot of crying today, but it was good tears, from wonderful memories of him. Going to spend this evening with my good friend Dana, who lost her husband (at age 48) about 1 1/2 years ago. We are eating out, watching a movie, and drinking a little wine of the vine. She is having some surgery next week, so this is our big party before her surgery. My Michael and Dana's husband Morris were good friends, and I would like to think they are together, watching out for us. Good weekend, and peace to all of us who are in this club we did not ask to join.

God Bless you all for being here and listening to me go on and on.

Mary in Arkansas (Queeniemary)

[Chrissie]

Dear Mary,

It will also be 7 months for me the 31st of this month and I know exactly how you feel. My husband, Tim and I did everything together, if we were apart it was because I was at work. I miss him so much and am just lost without him. I've really had some rough weeks lately. I try to stay active with work & friends but when all is said & done he is still not going to be there when I get home. I too have beautiful memories of our time together and those memories bring tears of happiness. It makes me sad to know I won't get to grow old with him and live out our plans to full time in out trailer. How he loved to travel before he got ill, infact the day he went into hospice I was trying to arrange a trip by the ocean because that is something he really wanted to do. I am so thankful for this site. I don't post much but I do come to it often. May we all find peace in knowing they are with us all the time and are no longer suffering. God Bless.

Chris

[kayc]

This is such a hard stage...the time when the protective shock has worn off, everyone has gone home, and you're left to figure out what to do with your life. It's about the time when you no longer expect to hear their voice on the other end of the phone or when the door opens you don't look up expecting to see them. My heart goes out to you. We do somehow manage to muddle through our life that is left and survive...that cold hard word that sounds like an oxymoron. Most of us don't feel this is survival at all, and yet that is what "they" tell us we are.

Just today I had someone tell me that I'd find another George and go on with my life. Ha! Most of us know and agree that that is preposterous, ridiculous even! Those who have not been through this can't possibly know...not unless you've been stuck in this club that none of us asked for.

I send my hugs to both of you gals...know you are not alone, we're all in this together.

Kay

[closs86]

What is wrong with people, how could they say you will find another george, people are so insensitive, they do say some dumb things to me to already, my husband passed in april, of this year, I just don't think they get it,how it hurts, and that the last thing on our minds is to find someone else. How could that make us feel better, it is not the person we loved and lost, and it will never be. I just don't get the way they think. I would never say that to someone that lost a spouse.

Hugs Karen