Sunday Without My Hubby

[abergsma]

My daughter is here with my 2 grandsons. She is cooking supper and the boys are cleaning up the nuts that have fallen from our huge oak tree.

I start crying..it seems so unbelievable that Cecil isn't here with us..it is so not normal.

My daughter tries to comfort me but I still can't stop crying.

I need him back in my life.

We had so many years ahead of us, I feel cheated.

[Jay Wyatt]

We had so many years ahead of us, I feel cheated.

I feel exactly the same way. Mary was only 53 years old. I was married to her for 27 years and I thank God for every one of them. Still I feel cheated also. We both worked hard while we were young and had plans and dreams of growing old together and slowing down to enjoy life more. Those plans were shattered on august 27 of this year. I know that none of us are promised tomorrow but I never realized how true that is until it happened. I have learned that we should make today count and not wait until tomorrow because it may never come. I'm not suggesting that we live like there is no tomorrow or that we don't make plans, only that we make the best of each day that we are given with the understanding that it could be our last. It is tragic that Mary had to die before I learned that lesson.

God Bless You

Jay

[rain]

I need him back in my life.

We had so many years ahead of us, I feel cheated.

I keep saying the same thing over and over and over again. We had plans, we had dreams, we had time. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

I pass by his pictures on the wall and find myself stopping, looking into his twinkling eyes imploring, "Where are you? Where are you, my love? I need you here with me. You're supposed to be with me..."

I hear you. I need him back in my life. I can't have him, but I need him. All I know how to do is cry. I wish I had something more helpful. All I can say is that I understand. (( ))

[Guest popengena]

I am so sorry for ur losses...I am feeling exactly the same way I had to take Joe's pictures down because everytime I saw one, a floodgate of tears is sure to follow. I was showing a freind something on my computer yesterday.....a picture of a dog..but I had to scroll thru 2 thousand pictures of my life with Joe...I just started crying..and looking at him before he was so sick......I cry now thinking of it..He was always funny......I miss that so much..even if we weren't getting along, lol..he'd come in and say something so stupid, I would crack up and we'd be fine again....I miss my buddy in life so much......

[Perkins808]

I have said that so many times myself - I feel cheated.

Tomorrow will be 3 months since Jeff died. We had only been married for 9 months. For Christmas a couple of years ago Jeff bought me this big wooden plaque - it says "Grow old with me.....the best is yet to be." I never imagined that a year and a half after I hung it over my bed that he would be gone and I would go to bed every night with it as a cruel reminder that he will NOT grow old with me, yet I can't bring myself to take it down.

Everytime I start thinking about being cheated I think of a conversation that Jeff and I had on several occasions.....it was about how certain people come into our lives for different reasons. Some are here for a long time, some for such a short time. But every person that comes into our lives teaches us something, whether we realize it or not. They help to shape us into who we are. Jeff helped to make me who I am. I always told him that if something ever happened to him, I would be a better person for having known him....and I believe I am. He had such a profound impact on my life.....one that continues even after his death.

I look back on the last 3 months and wonder how on earth did I ever make it 90 days without him.....and the only answer I've got is - one day at a time.

I wish you comfort abergsma.

Tammy

[abergsma]

I have said that so many times myself - I feel cheated.

Tomorrow will be 3 months since Jeff died. We had only been married for 9 months. For Christmas a couple of years ago Jeff bought me this big wooden plaque - it says "Grow old with me.....the best is yet to be." I never imagined that a year and a half after I hung it over my bed that he would be gone and I would go to bed every night with it as a cruel reminder that he will NOT grow old with me, yet I can't bring myself to take it down.

Everytime I start thinking about being cheated I think of a conversation that Jeff and I had on several occasions.....it was about how certain people come into our lives for different reasons. Some are here for a long time, some for such a short time. But every person that comes into our lives teaches us something, whether we realize it or not. They help to shape us into who we are. Jeff helped to make me who I am. I always told him that if something ever happened to him, I would be a better person for having known him....and I believe I am. He had such a profound impact on my life.....one that continues even after his death.

I look back on the last 3 months and wonder how on earth did I ever make it 90 days without him.....

I wish you comfort abergsma.

Tammy

Tammy, you are so right one day at a time....Thanks for your comforting words.

Allana

[redwind30]

I too feel robbed. So many things that we wanted to do together and never got to. Health problems, lack of finances etc stood in the way. We enjoyed being togeter; didn't have to do anything, just wanted to be together. It just isn't fair to lose a spouse at such an early age.

[abergsma]

Thank you all for your support!

Allana

[melina]

I need him back in my life.

We had so many years ahead of us, I feel cheated.

I feel the same way too. We had 29 years together - 28 of them being married. We had so many plans for the future - traveling, seeing our children find their paths in life, seeing our grandchildren born and grow up, having more time for each other. I feel very cheated and envious of other women who still have their husbands.

It just feels so meaningless. Not sure what to say to offer comfort, other than that you're not alone in your suffering.

Melina

[kayc]

We had so many years ahead of us, I feel cheated.

I felt that way too. Now I don't really think about it like that, it just is what it is. I don't know why some get to make it to their 50th and others get gypped. That'd be something to take up with the big guy I guess. I haven't ever heard any answers to that though.