The Journey Continues

[dave s]

I had stopped counting the days since Mike left for 2 days....then while getting ready for work the phone rang...it was work cant work until i complete a recertification course that expired when Mike was sick, I simply forgot my mind has been totally shot, they were understanding and supportive but cant work until this is resolved....luckily can take a class this weekend. Wow I wonder what else I have forgotten out there....

This coming week I am afraid will be difficult, Mondays are always hard, due to the day of his death, Tuesdays suck as I feel that is when I am trying to recover from Mon., Thursday Mike would have turned 46, and Saturday is our Anniversary.....I really hope I can function through all of this

Am surprised now at the friends that wont call and those who I thought wouldnt be checking on me are now supportive, have had friends state when can we expect the old Dave to return, I have told them not to expect that to happen, I know I have completely changed this experience has shaken me to the core, is making me reevaluate everything in my life, and maybe thats not a bad thing........was very happy with the life I had with Mike, but other areas in my life I havent been happy with, one primarily is my career.....20 yrs as a Nurse have taken there toll on my body and spirit, it is exhausting work, with few rewards, so perhaps it is not to late to head back to school to broaden wmy horizons....think this my opportunity to explore something else that could provide me some enjoyment.....

Yesterday was a strange day, our cat that Mike always hated and she hated him! didnt show up for breakfast, 12 toes is her name due to her having 12 front toes, she always comes for breakfast....have to admit that I was sure something had happened to her, and that she was in heaven tormenting Mike, fortunately she showed up for dinner, was so happy to see her....so I guess it was a good day wasnt in the mood for anymore losses!

Well guess I feel like i can get on with my day, need to do my daily phone calls to friends and family that want to hear I am ok...take care!

[Guest Nicholas]

Dave, birthdays and anniversaries are notoriously difficult, as are other siginificant days, eg the day of the week on which they died, day of the week of the funeral, etc. As Marty's recent article on grief stated so well, it is important for others to realize the importance to the bereaved of these dates. The closest of friends should remember these dates, but others probably won't. Next Wednesday is the six month anniversary and I think the only ones who will definitely remember will be my sister and my best friend.

Indeed, the journey continues.

Nicholas

[kayc]

Dave,

I think it's to be expected that a person forgets important things when grieving, our brain has gone through a huge trauma! I'm glad you can get your course in this weekend. And yeah, it is surprising who is there for us and who isn't! Who'd a thunk it!