PattiR Posted January 5, 2006 Report Share Posted January 5, 2006 Three weeks ago today I lost my fiance to a massive heart attack. (No, this was not an expected scenario, but right out of the blue and like a very bad joke.) Needless to say it has been devastating. In the past I've lost both parents and my only sibling suddenly, but I handled all that so differently. My fiance's family is quite large...7 brothers/sisters and their spouses/significant others, his four children, two ex-wives, his widowed mother, and a gazillion neices, nephews, aunts, uncles, and cousins, and not to mention ALL his friends and contacts. He lived in basically the same area all of his life, so you can imagine the network that he had, whereas I came from a very small family and my roots obviously didn't run quite so deep shall we say...work and lifestyle for a number of years had me all over the country and Europe, etc. I'm coming to grips with the loss of all the tomorrows, plans, dreams, etc. that he and I had and appreciating what time we did have together...a blessing. My pain at the moment is the way his family has pretty much dismissed me. I understand their loss well from my own past experiences with my family over the past decade. I just don't understand why I'm being dismissed and treated like his and my relationship really never existed. Whilst he was alive they treated me like a member of the family and were kind, but now I'm nothing and not even contacted at all. I just don't understand. Am I seeking validation of the relationship? Am I an unpleasant reminder? Do they hate me for they feel that he spent more time with me the past months than with them before his heart attack? Has anyone else experienced this sort of craziness from the "other" family? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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