Finally A Good Week-End

[kevin]

I find I am finally seeing a Positive side to this gut wrenching journey we are all in.....Most of us have to fill our time with something besides sorrow and Grief. Don't get me wrong, Grief can raise its head anytime without provocation, but we have an opportunity to explore alternatives...In the last 7 days, besides the Christmas Light project , I enlisted in a Senior Bowling League, joined a Ballroom dancing group at the local School, and volunteered with the Heart and Stroke........It appears like a bit much, but its only four days a week, and allows me to meet different people(which is what the Dr ordered) . Nothing will cure the emptiness we all have, but this seems to keep the mind distracted..........Took a quick journey up north visited kids and grand kids...had to make an appearance so they could see I'm fine....except for the weight loss(I am still over weight), they were all pleased, made arrangements to see them again in mid December.......not seeing any stars, but able to control and manage the "bursts" a lot better.....

[kayc]

Kevin,

You must be retired also.    I find that it's good to keep a balance, time out with people/activity, and solitude.  I have a place to go four days a week, sometimes it works into seven, but not all day every day, and I make sure I have plenty of time at home "just me" too.  It gives us time to contemplate, but also we have time among the living.  I spent my first year of retirement holed up, TOO isolated, and it's good that I have people to spend time with, things to do, now.

Right now I'm on my church's Praise Team (leads Sun. morning worship) which means practices, I'm Church Treasurer so that takes my Mondays plus occasional other days.  I help at the Senior Site Tuesdays and Thursdays (about three hours each).  Once a month I take my sisters out (one is quadriplegic, one in a walker, one is blind) with the help of my daughter and other sister, that's usually a Friday.  Thursday evenings are given to Community Choir practices.  Tuesday evenings are budget meetings.  Yet even with all of that activity, I find myself alone a LOT.  During that time, I take care my place, myself, my animals, cook, clean, keep up here, email, Facebook, make cards (my hobby), read, watch t.v., go for walks with my dog.  I've gotten into a routine and that helps.  Once a month I visit my granddaughter (and son and DIL), 2 1/2 hours away.

[kevin]

KayC.....I retired seven years ago , but we are definitely in the same frame of mind. ......I find  keeping yourself engaged is the key...you have added  purpose with your volunteer work....I have only began Church services and my own Bible study. I also watch every kind of sports.....As I mentioned, life will never be as it was because it can't, but it is slowly getting better....and I'm good with that today......take care.

[Guest]

Kevin

I glad to hear that life is slowly getting better.  I'm not there yet.  I walk, clean house, walk some more, take care of business, walk some more (around 12-15 miles a day).  I have an app that donates to cancer research $0.25 a mile so that's my motivation.  Someday I'll look into engaging with people more but am not ready yet.  Milestone for today was I made an appointment to have my teeth cleaned.  Been dreading it because the office is full of very kind and loving women who all adored Deedo; preparing for a sob-fest.  I am trying to adjust to retirement and widowhood at the same time.  Not working out that well as I never prepared for this kind of retirement....we were supposed to be traveling.

[Scottsgirl]

Brad, 

sorry to sidetrack your thread Kevin, but just for a second I promise.

what app is that you are using to track your walking that will make a donation to cancer research for every mile? I am very interested. 

Kevin, 

you certainly sound like you have found a good balance for your time. That's really fantastic. Nothing will ever fill that hole in your heart, a fact I am slowly coming to realize, but definitely being amongst the living is a good place to start. 

I am many years away from retirement, but have decided to return to work on the 31st of this month. Any more than 6 weeks of solitude and being alone with my thoughts will have me in a much darker place than I am right now, that certainly won't be good.

keep enjoying those activities! I'm a little jealous of all of you who are retired and can decide just what you want to fill your days with, me, it's off to work. Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work I go..... 

Cheers!