karenb

For Stallyn - I am so sorry. Your loss is new and the pain is awful. Try to just get through an hour, a day, whatever it is you need, a little at a time. I wish you had someone you could sit and talk with, that might help a little. I lost my husband a year and a half ago, suddenly, of a heart attack while he was driving on the freeway. He was gone immediately. Thank goodness my son-in-law was with him and got the truck to the side of the road so no one else got hurt. The last thing he said before going golfing was, "I'll see you later, dear. I love you." The shock was so bad when I got to the hospital, they put me in emergency. These people in these forums are wonderfully supporting and everyone has such sad stories. Try to be good to yourself, just go slowly, "one damn foot in front of the other." Keep us posted how you're doing. Your friend.....Karen

We do such strange things when our loss is new. I know you're not wacko, just grieving. My "strange" thing after a year and a half is I can't see his face in my mind and I'd love to. I think I must feel he's lost to me for now, I don't know. Take your time, go slowly, you will get better. As they all told me, it just takes time. You'll never forget her, you'll just get used to this "new" life. Take care and be good to yourself. Your friend....Karen

So glad you got through that. We'll pray for a good outcome. I'm new to the forum and really happy to be a part of it, seeing how everyone supports each other. The waiting is always hard. I had a stint put in my heart and I imagined all sorts of things. Hang in there....spring is here and summer around the corner. Karen

I also spend a lot of time in the gardens with my dog, especially the veggie garden. I have some "Grandpa Footprints" there and a little statue with two birds on it. Jack and I would walk down to the veggie garden and around the yard also. Sounds the same as you. Also the physical work I do out there does help....also to sleep at night. Nice to hear there are so many people out there like me, very comforting. Karen

Oh my God, I feel so terribly bad for you! You didn't have much time and so terribly in love and for it to end so violently. It's very easy to understand everything you are going through. Unfortunately, you need to continue on for yourself and for those who love you. Saying, "It gets easier" just doesn't help now, it's really one day or one hour at a time. You definately are not worthless! Your life has drastically changed but down the road you'll start climing out of this, little by little. My heart is with you. God Bless You. Karen

Hi Lorikelly I'm new in these groups but I certainly will say a prayer for your strength. Just keep calling on the Good Lord, He hears everything. Hang in there...everything will be all right. Karen

Let me....us....know how you are whenever you can and please hang in there. Take care. Karen

Wherever you are in life, whatever has happened....MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU. Karen

To kayc...Thank you for the comforting comments. Things will be better with my daughter, she is a wonderful person and going through some stressful times herself. She just needs some quiet time for herself, too, as she just loved Jack so much.....far more than her biological father whom she never sees. Thank the Good Lord that Jack and I were together for the time that we had or I never would have known how wonderful a good, loving, caring and giving a husband can be. I will never forget it. Karen

Thanks so much. You guys are wonderful and so caring. I'm glad I found you all. There is so much pain in this world. It takes a lot to be strong and helpful friends are such a blessing. Thank you, again. Karen

Thank you so much, Benita. It really does help to know someone who really does understand how you feel. There are wonderful memories. Thanks again. Karen

Here's a big hug....please hang in....Karen

I'm new at this. My husband has been gone for a little over a year and a half. My heart just so much goes out to you. Your letter here is so full of pain and I'm so sorry. I just really have a lump in my throat for you. I feel so many of those things...family...friends...so alone without your husband...I just hope you can pull your way through day by day. My heart is with you. Karen

My husband died suddenly, driving on the freeway, from heart failure. I knew this might happen someday but I sure wasn't ready. It's been since August of 2005 and I have grown somewhat, but the other night I had a melt-down, called a friend and just cried. She was worried and said that, because of the quick circumstances of his death and me with no preparation, that maybe I might consult someone, which I had never done before. You are the ones I'm consulting. I have lots of "lumps in my throat", don't like holidays, and all the everything that you all do. My dog is my wonderful companion. I have three children, the closest one is my daughter, and usually she calls me all the time but there has been a rift (complicated) and so I don't hear from her as much even though I apologized for my "whatever." I think I sometimes don't want to be around all these happy people so I excuse myself, politely, and just come home. I just have a lump in my throat and you all seem like you really know what's happening. I plain just still love my husband…. Karen

I sure know what you guys mean about writing that word on the tax form. That was another "eye opener." In my "woman's church group" this morning several women were talking about their husbands not going to church with them and it just popped out of my mouth, "I guess I might be lucky because my husband is always there with me." They were quiet. There are little things, aren't there? Karen

Janine....Thank you for your reply. It really does help to talk to people who are going through the same thing. This process is a long one. I'm so sorry about your sister. I know your family is going through a lot of pain. I know we'll come out fine in the long run but getting there is hard. Hang in there. Karen

My husband died in July of 2005 and I still miss him so much and have "melt downs" and just cry when something good or something not so good happens. He died immediately of a heart attack driving home on the freeway from golfing but I was saved from those awful last moments that he never even knew. It's such a process that we go through trying to cope with this but you will come out on the other end successfully....it just takes time and just know that you'll never forget...just will eventually accept it and know that you have to go on. Just keep on being busy, give help to others when you can, clean the house...clean everything in sight, work in a yard or plant something in pots, just cry when you want to and please know it does get easier. I'm so sorry you have to go through this....I'm sure you have friends you can call....hang in there. Karen

I so understand about missing your husband so much. Mine passed away a year and nine months ago and I still have "melt downs" and just cry, especially when somethis good or not so good happens and I really wish he were here. I don't know how long this lasts. I also do try to keep busy and active with gardening, new church group, photography and my wonderful companion, Sadie Mae, my black lab. I really wish you well and very much understand how you feel. Karen