Vero Posted June 15, 2006 Report Share Posted June 15, 2006 Dear all, Pleaes help me. I don't know what to do. Im in such pain over the loss of mom (its been 3 months) that Im just ready to give up. Im supposed to fly home this Saturday to spend the week with my sister and my mother's husband to go thru her belongings, take what I want, etc. I have bought my plane ticket almost 1 month ago. But I just can't do this. I don't want to go anymore. I don't want to go and sleep at her house and im sure it still smells like her. I don't want to go thru her things as this will bring a finality to it. It makes the fact of not having my mom around anymore real and I just can't deal with this pain. It's unbareable. I don't feel ready to accomplish this task. I just want to hide and not think and not deal with the pain. I want to cancel my trip. I know that my familly will be disappointed but I also know that they would understand. I just can't go thru with this at this time. Am i beeing selfish? Am I being just a big crybaby? Im 32 years old and I never needed my mom like I need her today. Extreme sadness, loneliness, emptiness, anger ... I've been carrying this with me for 3 months now and I can't do it anymore. It's too heavy, its crushing me and I just can't go anymore. How am I still able to go to work everyday, fill up my car, grocery shopping ... I don't know ...I guess Im really good at faking it. Faking too be ok, I can't never tell the truth to anyone, I don't want to bother anyone with all my sobbing. I do wish I could just tell everyone, no, im not doing good. Im really sad all the time and I need help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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