erinlore Posted May 26, 2020 Report Share Posted May 26, 2020 My 22 year old brother was coming home from work on December 5th when he got into a car accident. The other driver clipped his back tire and my brothers car flipped and hit a street light. We were told he died instantly which is a small comfort, but the other driver walked away uninjured. My parents are divorced and he was my only sibling. We were pretty close but ever since this happened I feel I should have been nicer to him, more understanding, less of an annoying little sister. Just an overall better sibling. I feel awful. I feel that he deserves to be here more than I do and that I would trade places with him in an instant. I feel so terrible for my parents and I feel sad that they can't really grieve together. I mean they're amicable, but they're still divorced and obviously don't live together. For the past few months I have been struggling to find someone who understands what I'm going through. I have tried to find grief groups in my area for people who have lost a sibling with no luck. I understand why siblings are often referred to as the "forgotten mourners". I feel so alone. And I do talk to a therapist once a week and have my friends and family who all say "you aren't alone" but none of them understand. My brother and I were two years apart. I always looked up to him and tried to copy what he did. As we got older we would laugh together (sometimes at the expense of our parents) or send funny memes or videos to each other. He made me laugh more than anyone else. I just feel so so alone. I miss him more than words can ever explain. I hate that the guy who killed him is just living his life. I googled grief forums tonight because I just can't handle this anymore. I try not to bring things up to my parents because I don't want to make them sad or make them comfort me. I just feel so empty and guilty that I get to live and my brother is in the ground. I hate this so much I can't even express. I guess I just wanted to get some of my thoughts out there. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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