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Almost a year since my mom passed


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They say that as time passes, it becomes easier; however, on 3/24 it will be one year since I lost my mom and it hurts just like it happened yesterday. Just typing that has me in tears. I miss her voice, her smile, I miss just knowing she is home with my dad. I find myself blocking it out and pretending or imagining that she is at home. I realize that's a form of denial, but I'm just struggling with the reality.

If I feel any type of happiness or if something makes me laugh, I feel guilty.  Will I ever feel like myself again? My husband and I were talking about how difficult this has been for me and he suggested that I see a grief counselor. I believe that's what I need to do as well, I'm just not sure how it will help. I don't think talking to someone is going to make it hurt any less, but hoping that maybe someone here can give me some advice or suggestions. I'm just at a loss.

Thank you,

Robbi

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Hi Robbi. I don't know who "they" are, but I can tell you that, for many (if not most) of us, the second year of grief can seem harder than the first. By now all the initial shock and numbness have worn off, there's greater awareness of all you have lost since your mom died, and you're faced with the harsh reality that she is never coming back.

You'll find links to many helpful and relevant resources here: Grief In the Second Year: Finding Your Way

I too hope you will consider meeting with a qualified grief counselor ~ While that may not, as you say, make it hurt any less, it does give you a safe and private place to take your grief, minus any concerns that you are burdening another with your pain. The focus is on you and what you need. It can give you a different perspective, a better understanding of the grief process, and some individual insight into yourself and your own unique reactions to your loss. I'm a firm believer that a few sessions with a grief counselor can change your life for the better. You are worth it, and you deserve it. See Finding Grief Support That Is Right For You

Note that both these articles list links to a number of additional related resources. ❤️

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I am so sorry for your loss...grief is a journey with a beginning, but not an ending.  It does, however, evolve with time.  It takes effort to make our way through this and adjust to the changes it means for our lives.

In addition the the article Marty posted, I think these could be of help...
Tips to Make Your Way through Grief
Grief Process
Continuing Bonds - WYG

Continuing beyond physical death
Continuing Relationships
Parent Loss: Continuing Their Song

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8 hours ago, MartyT said:

Hi Robbi. I don't know who "they" are, but I can tell you that, for many (if not most) of us, the second year of grief can seem harder than the first. By now all the initial shock and numbness have worn off, there's greater awareness of all you have lost since your mom died, and you're faced with the harsh reality that she is never coming back.

You'll find links to many helpful and relevant resources here: Grief In the Second Year: Finding Your Way

I too hope you will consider meeting with a qualified grief counselor ~ While that may not, as you say, make it hurt any less, it does give you a safe and private place to take your grief, minus any concerns that you are burdening another with your pain. The focus is on you and what you need. It can give you a different perspective, a better understanding of the grief process, and some individual insight into yourself and your own unique reactions to your loss. I'm a firm believer that a few sessions with a grief counselor can change your life for the better. You are worth it, and you deserve it. See Finding Grief Support That Is Right For You

Note that both these articles list links to a number of additional related resources. ❤️

Hi Marty, thank you so much for this. I will definitely follow through with locating a counselor.

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12 minutes ago, kayc said:

I am so sorry for your loss...grief is a journey with a beginning, but not an ending.  It does, however, evolve with time.  It takes effort to make our way through this and adjust to the changes it means for our lives.

In addition the the article Marty posted, I think these could be of help...
Tips to Make Your Way through Grief
Grief Process
Continuing Bonds - WYG

Continuing beyond physical death
Continuing Relationships
Parent Loss: Continuing Their Song

Thank you Kay. I appreciate this and will read the articles.

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