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Visiting The Hospital

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I had to go back to the hospital where YIANI died. My sister in law had complications with her chronic health problem. I thought iwould not make it .My feet were trembling and my heart was going crasy.All bad memories came back as if it was yesterday that he was gone.Imiss him so very mutch. Ifeel so jelouse of couples that are together and dont apresiate.Summer is here and all of YIANIS friends are enjoing the sun and sea why he had to go? IM so lonely without his love and his beautiful blue eyes looking at me and telling me every day ILOVE YOU. teny I

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Teny, I am so sorry for you loss....that you are here among us "left behind". I know those words are hollow but they are genuine. I have not posted much lately but I am a little over 2 years into this long journey. My husband had been in and out of every hospital...every rehab center in my area. At 7 months I had to visit a friend in one of the hospitals. It was someone who wrapped her arms around me early on in my journey. She was a complete stranger at the time and now is a good friend. Everything is hard and you are taking a step forward. I can remember the feeling. I thought every cell in my body would shake me apart and me knees would not hold me up. I fought off tears long enough to visit my friend tho it was a short visit. I know the emptiness you are feeling. Nothing fills that but it does get easier as time passes to deal with it. I miss my husband terribly every day. Now I can talk about Gene without falling apart. We take baby steps forward and most of the time we fall back 2 steps along the way. As you go someone here is walking with you who understands all you are feeling. Be patient with yourself and let time take care of the rest of the world. Life can no longer be the same but I have learned to accept it...not like it. And that's taken a long time. I still fight to keep myself sane at times but good memories and Gene's love keep me going. I am grateful everyday that I had 28 years the wonder of Gene's love. And it's his love and courage that keep me going.

You are not alone Teny.

Always Gene!


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Teny - I, too, am so sorry you had to return to the hospital where you lost your beloved Yiani! I can imagine how had that was for you...just driving past the hospital where my Charlie passed away is so tough. I am a little over 2 1/2 years, now, and I still miss him terribly and I always will!!

I know it seems impossible to believe at this point, but with time the pain will get easier.

We are all here for you, so just keep coming here and we will ALL get through this together. I know for me this website has been a life saver! As painful as it is, it helps to know that you are not alone and that others are/have experienced the same pain. We all have a common bond and I wish I could meet all of you.

Take care of yourself, Teny!! My cyber hugs are with you.


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I can't imagine what it was like to go back there so soon. I just recently went back to the hospital where my husband died, and it had been almost two years. I couldn't stop the tears from flowing but I made it through it. Someone on this site mentioned going there for my friend and so I tried to concentrate on that. There was no question of going, it was just hard to make it through. You went through a big hurdle and survived it, you should be proud of yourself, that is hard. I understand what you mean that you re jealous of people who are together and don't even appreciate each other. I have a hard time, too, understanding why we had to be yanked apart when we loved each other so much, yet others get to live on and keep each other. No one said life was fair, it sure isn't.

I can tell from what you say how much you loved each other and always will.

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