How To Return To Avoiding Old Bad Habits?

[KathyG]

Has anyone else found that bereavement is causing them to re-adopt old bad habits? How can you stop this from happening?

Stress eating has always been a problem for me. Since January, I've lost a lot of weight thanks to a good diet/exercise plan. I'm happy about this and would like to lose more pounds. Up to now, the plan had (I thought) killed my cravings for sweets and carbs. But since Bill died, my appetite is completely out of whack. I've been sick with a cold, too. Either I don't want to eat at all, or I want the wrong kinds of food (cookies, candy, pasta, etc.).

I don't want to ruin the success I've had. I do force myself to eat when I'm not hungry, just for nourishment. When I do, I stick to my diet plan but don't eat all the food I'm supposed to have. But then when I feel really depressed, that's when overeat the "bad" foods.

How can I get my control back? It's so hard for me to do even simple things now.

[kayc]

Yes Kathy, I've been through that. When George died I lost weight because I didn't feel like eating, then I gained weight because I just flat didn't care. Now I find myself overweight and needing to do something about it. A friend and I are going to begin a plan 1/02 and we'll partner together, I find I need both the accountability and the support to do this.

I think if we can control the things we can, like our body's nourishment and getting exercise, it'll help us feel more confident and better about having reclaimed some of the power we lost when our mates died through no choice of our own. It is hard because in order to take care of yourself, you have to want to, and that doesn't normally occur when you're depressed, which is a common grief reaction. It may take you some time, but you can feel ready to do this and I know if you don't let things spin out of control first, you will feel all the more ahead for it. Wishing you the best...

KayC

[teny]

I do understand my sister inlaw says that carbs sweets pasts are confort foods that is why we go for them when we are in stress.Gi ve it time and may be you will return to old good habits that realy keep you well.TENY

[karenb]

What Teny saide about "time" is worth remembering. It really just is that and you'll come back to the you, you want to be. Just remember we all have had this shock that is so difficult to deal with. Just take care and you'll be fine, if you allow yourself to be.

Your friend, Karen

[Stallyn]

Kathy,

I didn't smoke for 7 years, then one day one cig lead to another. Don't think there was a good reason to stop again until I became sick of the effect it had on me, and the lack of eating didn't help. Once we accept our loss, gradually we start caring about US again

[kayc]

William,

That's a good point. I am just now getting ready to tackle my weight again. I'm not even sure I've reached the place where I care about me again, but I'm getting there little by little.

[karenb]

Good for you guys. It's so important to take care of ourselves or where would we be. I certainly have my "down" times, as you know, but the two things I always try to do is eat right and exercise 3 times a week. The exercise class has some very conforting and supporting women who have helped me out from the beginning. We all need to hang in there in all our "trials."

Your friend, Karen

[Stallyn]

Takes alot of effort, I tried and fail every time, when the stress hits, I go at it again and start the cycle over and over, it never really stops. Maybe we just underestimate ourselves, little by little and tiny steps