Sturggling With The Loss Of My Dog

[AliciaBarnes]

Myself and my husband are really struggling with the loss of our dog Adolf. He was our beloved miniature schnauzer. He was such an amazing little dog while he was in our life. He was a wonderful pet. To us he was our first child. He was only given a little over 2 and 1/2 years of life and during the 2 years that we had him he brought us great joy and love. We fell in love with him the first day we had him. We got him a few months after my husband's father passed away and he really helped us get through that. He was here during all or our family hardships. He was here for my husband when he was out of a job for a few months. He was here for me during my pregnancy .When my husband was at work at night he would curl up in bed next to my belly. He was here when we had our son and brought him home. He would sleep under the bassinette when the baby was first born. At night he always slept on the foot of our bed. When I would wake up at night with the baby he would get up with me as I fed and cared for the baby. Last night was our first night without him, and the first time our son has ever slept through the night. To me that is a strange coencidence that with my night time buddy gone the baby slept through the night. I do not know of anyone that did not fall in love with him as soon as they met him. Adolf was so much more than a pet to us, he was a family member. Late last week he started getting sick, by Saturday and Sunday he refused to eat. On Monday we took him into the vet. They decided he was so sick from his heart murmur. They thought that blood was backing up into his liver and causing him to vomit and not eat. We started him on heart and liver medicine and they gave him IV fluids in hopes that he would be feeling better by Tuesday. Tuesday came and he was getting much sicker, refused to eat or drink, he could barely walk. We rushed him back to the vet and they did x-rays and discovered that his heart was seriously enlarged. By the afternoon he was having congestive heart failure. I was able to go up and spend some time with him and take him his favorite toy. He could not even stand up on his own to see me. Late Tuesday afternoon we had to have him put to sleep so that he would not suffer anymore. He is being cremated (with his favorite toy) so we will receive his ashes on Friday. I know that will be another hard day for us. It was the hardest thing I think I have ever had to do. I feel like I lost a member of my family yesterday. I have cried more than I have in a long, long time. It broke both my heart and my husbands to let him go. We will never have another pet that measures up to his standards. I was looking forward to having him for years and years to come. I wanted my son to be able to grow up with him and now he will miss out on that joy. I am just crying even typing this. How do you recover from a loss like this, any advice for us? Thanks so much, Alicia

[Laurena]

Hello Alicia,

I am very sorry for your loss....I am sure you have heard this a lot. But, coming from a big pet lover, I understand totally. My cat died about two weeks ago, well he was hit by a car I assume (I have posts in the cat greivance forum)....which is still VERY hard for me because he was my companion. I had him for almost two years...

You will recover fully I would say really, but it shouldn't be looked at as a bad thing. He was a part of you and your family, its normal to be upset and sad I think. I'm not sure if you have other pets, but if not maybe you should get another puppy....not to replace Adolf of course but to bring in the animal love that it seems you want in for you and your household.

[wolfman645]

I am so sorry for the loss of your dog Adolf.

I too lost my favorite cat of almost 18 years about 6 weeks ago. I too felt like he was my first child. As far as advise, all I can say is please express your emotions and let them out because that is the only way to deal with this very real loss. Even if you have to express them privately, or on this board you must let them out. Also, undestand the grief will come in waves and you will have good days and then get blind sided by bad days too.

Andy

[Boo Mayhew]

Alicia, I am so sorry that you lost your little dog. Some people just don't understand just how it tears your heart to lose a pet.

My initial reaction after losing my beautiful rottweiler (Hammer) was that I could not possibly get another dog because it would be disloyal to him, and also because there was NO WAY ON EARTH that I was going to set myself up to feel that way again EVER (if I got a dog and then it eventually died of old age like he did).

But ... a couple of months after losing Hammer I was not coping with it very well and my late husband suggested that we should get another dog ... so I checked the pet page of the local paper and saw an ad and thought I would call them when I got back from grocery shopping. When I got home my husband had circled the same ad that I was looking at!!! It was actually for two dogs ... Fred and Barney ... Barney is a long-haired Jack Russell Terrier and Fred is a mongrel who was badly beaten as a puppy and he is completely deaf (so have taught him some Sign Language).

Let me tell you that they have never replaced Hammer, but I love them as much as I loved him. Just differently! I have now lost my husband and they weren't allowed upstairs before, but they now sleep with me and I would not be without my two little friends.

They helped me to grieve and heal after Hammer died, and they are helping me again.

I can't tell you what to do, but my gut reaction is this. There are too many unloved dogs out there ... you've got love that you give to one of them.

Again, I am so sorry ... sending you bearhug

[Punk's mom]

I know how you feel about your little Adolf. My husband and I had to help our little baby mini Punkin go to rest. We had had her for 10 1/2 years, since she was 6 weeks old and she was the light of our life. She was with me 24/7. I called her my little shadow. She started having health problems at 1 year of age and was steadily sick with something from there, colitis, skin and eye allergies, sensitive stomach, kidney failure and finally osteoporosis and arthritis. When we had her put to sleep, she was in so much pain. She couldn't even feel her back legs or walk on them. She looked at me with the saddest puppy dog eyes I have ever seen. I just never looked at Punkin as getting old. She always acted like a puppy and that is what we called her most of the time, either Puppy or Itty Bitty. I found out through talking with a breeder (NOT A PUPPY MILL!) that inbreeding can cause all kinds of problems. It made me so angry I wanted to call the people we got her from and give them a piece of my mind but that wouldn't stop my grief and loneliness. I don't want to get up in the morning because she slept in the bed with us, I don't want to come home when I have to go out for a few hours because she is not there to meet me at the door. She always ran out the door to greet Daddy when he came home from work. She LOVED her treats and would sometime get up at 1 am in the morning to go potty so she could get one. The last day of her little life, she wouldn't even eat her treats or a bit of peanut butter which she loved. I had been taking her to the vet on a regular basis for all her problems and trying to do anything and everything to help her. I even took her to a specialist and there was no help there at all. Mama and Daddy were with her when she took her last breath at the vets and then we brought her home wrapped in her pink baby blanket. We put her in a waterproof box with her favorite toys and her leash. She loved to go for walks. We buried my baby in the back yard and have a marker there where she is at. I keep thinking about the Rainbow Bridge and hoping when my time comes I will see her there and be with her forever. This was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I miss her so much it hurts. Punk's mama

[kayc]

I am so sorry in the loss of your Adolf. I have lost too many pets in the past few years, and each one is so hard as we miss the unique creature they were. There are some pets I continue to miss years later, the void cannot be filled, but eventually with time the tears stop even when the missing continues. Creating a memorial spot seemed to help me, erecting something commemorating them.