Phone Contact List And Email Address Book

[tytybaby1208]

Hi everyone! I am having a tough time. 2 friends died recently back to back around October. I still have them in my cell phone contact list and on my email address book. I just cant seem to delete them. Like that will make it real and final. Has anyone had an experience like this?

[Elaine M]

Hello TyTy I have had similar experiences, Like my mom, my dad, 2 of my sons friends were killed. THey are all there I still have my dads, my mom died in 87 Leave them, and one day you will know that you do not need their number to stay connected. You will be connected in your heart.So I say leave be, let time heal the recent loss and one day you will feel different about this.

Sorry about your loss,

Elaine M

[Guest Gamer205]

Hi Friend,

I'm Sorry for your losses, but Yes I have had something almost like that, My Best friend was killed in a car accident on May 31st 2004, and I use to call him all the time, We were like brothers, had fun and just enjoyed playing video games and sports and things like that, he was 20 years old, Well I still Call his phone number cause he was living with his mother when he was killed in that wreck, He was disabled, he was with his mom she was driveing just a tragic accident, shes a very safe driver, she pulled out to make a turn she said she could have sware there was nothing comming but she must have just not seen it, and They were struck head on, The truck that hit them hit the passanger side where he was and he was killed on Impact, he was the only Child she had, She stayed in the hospital for 3 months and could not even attend his funeral, I couldn't imagine how hard that must have been for her,

I still keep in contact with her, and It was so diffrent when I first got use to calling that number that being my Friend's number and now Calling and him not picking up the phone anymore, but I keep a check on her, and let her know I'm there for her, and We are best friends!

You Take Care and thanks for reading my story.

[tytybaby1208]

Thank you Elaine! I was not expecting a reply like yours. I really thought I was gonna be told to delete them all imediately. Thank you!

Hi everyone! I am having a tough time. 2 friends died recently back to back around October. I still have them in my cell phone contact list and on my email address book. I just cant seem to delete them. Like that will make it real and final. Has anyone had an experience like this?

[MartyT]

Dear One,

I think you'll find that here, in this very warm and caring place, no one will ever tell you what you "should" or "should not" be doing with your grief (or with your contact list and address book). This is YOUR story, your loss, your grief ~ and you are in the best position to decide how you wish you proceed through this most difficult of journeys. Oftentimes in grief we're afraid we're "going crazy" ~ but that is simply because we're not familiar with grief, we don't have any experience to draw upon, and we don't know what reactions are normal and even common. We live in a death-denying culture, we have very few models for how to deal with death and loss, and we just don't talk about these things in our usual social circles. That's why it helps so much to read the posts in these forums, to learn how other mourners think and feel and behave, and to do some reading about what is normal in grief. You come to realize that you're not crazy, you're not "losing it," and you can learn some ways to manage your reactions. Best of all, you come to know that you are not alone.

[jrm]

Marty, I really admire the way you make us all feel so welcome to this site. It's true we are all learning from each other how to handle this grief. I know I find much comfort either from those who feel their faith carries them or the support of friends. When I felt really overcome a few days ago you spoke with me personally with your recommendations. I know I'll be okay, but just knowing that someone is listening right then is so very important. I will always listen to you. Thank you for caring. Jude

[MartyT]

[Greta]

tytybaby, I too am sorry for your loss. I kept a voice mail message from my mother on my home phone until I sold my house. Deleting is difficult for me. I don't want to delete anything connected with her.

Elaine, Such good advice ... leave it for now.

Gamer, Your posts are so very sweet and caring. You've a pure heart.

Jude, I hope you're well. You're so right about Marty ... she's an intuitive healer, isn't she? She quite literally saved my life. I have been so very, very angry, my loss was so long ago, I thought I had no place to go. Marty welcomed me so warmly and firmly, her suggestions so spot-on and re-directive ... I too am grateful for our loving listener and guide.

Marty, Your warmth and wisdom support all of us. You're a wonderful teacher. My gratitude is boundless.

I met a librarian today whose grandchild was murdered by the father. They still have the trial to go through, and even though we're strangers (were strangers) she asked me over for coffee next week. Somehow, my re-cycling period has opened doors in my own heart. Such an encounter might have frightened me before, but I can channel responses from loving hearts on this site. I'm learning to be open again. I referred her to this site. I'm so very, very grateful for this site and the people who come here.

I don't judge myself so harshly after reading others' stories. I'm less afraid, even hopeful.

Greta