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My Friend Raymond Died


sunstreet

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My friend Raymond died on March 23, 2011. I am feeling extremely sad. I met Raymond at the long term care facility where I volunteer. We celebrated his 90th Birthday not that long ago. Raymond had a life fraught with tragedies and trauma and lived with cripling rheumatoid arthritis and had every understandable reason to be a bitter angry man. Raymond chose to be the opposite and was like a ray of sunshine and had a smile that could lift your spirit no matter how low you might be feeling.

I received a call while working on March 23 telling me that Raymond was asking for me and could I come by after work even though it would be after 9pm to which I replied of course without hesitation. After hanging up from the call I found it hard to concentrate on my work and had an overwhelming sense I should go there sooner rather than later. I asked my manager if I could combine my breaks and go over and spend an hour with Raymond...now. To my delight my manager said go ahead.

When I arrived Raymond looked at me and said " I am going to die today" I felt tears well up and I said not a word. Raymond asked if I could get his favorite song "Bluebird of Happiness" by John Charles Thomas playing and so of course I did and set it so it would just keep replaying.

Then I sat by his bedside. Raymond asked if he could hold my hand and I offered him my hand. He said to me I want you to know that I love you like a daughter; you brought joy into my life; and before I met you I felt dead inside; and I came alive again because of you. I said to Raymond, that I loved him like a Father and that I felt blessed that our paths had crossed...Raymond interrupted me and said no; our paths came together. Raymond then said to me promise me that you will always go towards the Light; to which I replied; always and forever. Raymond then said, my life is complete and I am at peace. He then drew in a big breath and on the exhale he was gone.

I miss him already. I felt such a kinship with him due to our respective life's fraught with tragedy and trauma and being all alone in the world. Sometimes when I would visit neither of us said a word out loud but so much was said. It was just that kind of a bond.

His funeral is today and I will be giving the eulogy. I hope that I do a fine job and can get through without weeping till it is over and I home again.

Rest in Peace Raymond.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

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What a touching and beautiful story, Sunstreet, and what an extraordinary relationship the two of you share. How wonderful that your friend chose you to be with him, as he exchanged his earthly address for a heavenly one. I'd like to believe that he is with Melissa now, helping her watch over you ~ and I know you carry both of them in your heart. Our thoughts and prayers are with you as you deliver Raymond's eulogy today

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Thank you Nicholas, I do feel proud and blessed. I continue to hold you in gentle thought and prayer. I feel at rest knowing that Raymond was ready and at peace to die and felt as he had had a "good long run" as he put it. Truly, and inspiration to behold.

Thank you Marty, I too like to think that Melissa and Raymond have met and having some great converstaions now. Yes, they are both residing in my heart. I will miss Raymond beyond words but feel at peace because Raymond was at peace. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers so very much.

I went by my favorite place by the water this morning as that is where I go to feed my soul and my spirit. I have no words written for I know the words will just come from my heart without struggle....and if I weep during...I will not judge myself for feeling and expressing myself, I will just let it be.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

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Dear Grace,

Thank you very much. I was a very good friend to Raymond as he was to me. I gave the eulogy at his funeral and it was my greatest pleasure to do so. Just yesterday I went to the facility, for others are mourning and missing Raymond too. You can pay a little money and have dinner with the residents and I did so and then I played the piano for our usual sing-a-long. I found myself tearing up missing Raymond's singing off key and smiles of encouragement for me as I played the piano. What I miss most is the quiet times that Raymond and I shared over a game of chess when neither of us spoke much but so much was said. I always let him win...and I think he knew it. I know that he and Melissa have met in heaven and what else warms my heart is that Raymond has also met my Grandmother.

Raymond, was truly an inspiration and how lucky was I to have felt him in my life.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hi Sunstreet, I wanted to post this to tell you that you are so special to alot of people and that Raymond sounded like a pretty nice man.. It must have be nice to know that you had such a bond with him and I think you both were blessed to find each other.. I am sending you peaceful hugs and I am keeping you close in my prayers and know that I am standing beside you as you do this for your special friend... Shelley

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  • 1 month later...

Dear Shelley,

Thank you so much and I am sorry that I am only thanking you now. I have needed to do some personal work that would not be appropriate to share on any of these forums so have not been on in a long time.

You too Shelley are very special and a lot of people care for you and about you as well. I encourage you to continue on your path of healing.

Courage and Blessings, Carol Ann

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Dear Sad,

How very kind of you and thank you for your post. You know I was thinking of Raymond all day today at work. I have to go back into court on Monday for my final testimony in a civil suit and it would have been so good to talk with Raymond about it. Not something appropriate for any of these forums I don't think to talk about it. When I logged on just now and saw you had made a post here well I just teared up. God, the Higher Power that I know works in wondorous ways if I just remember to keep my heart open to Him. I was really missing Raymond today and it was just so good to log on and see your post here. Thank you so much.....you have helped me. I don't know that I am amazing but I thank you for thinking I am.

Courage and Blessings, Carol Ann

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