STARKISS Posted April 1, 2011 Report Share Posted April 1, 2011 Hi All, I can not believe that April 18 of this year marks the seventh anniversary of my dear mom's death... It seems like yesterday that it happen, I know that I have come along way but on April 18th I will take time to celebrate the memory of my dear mom... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DebFromLodi Posted April 1, 2011 Report Share Posted April 1, 2011 Oh Shelley, Seven years OMG. My mom has been gone for only 3 years and it seems like forever since i saw her beautiful face. I feel your emptiness and pain, my friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted April 2, 2011 Report Share Posted April 2, 2011 Wow Shelley,7yrs,I can't imagine that one day I too will be saying 7years. I like to think of every year now as being one year closer to seeing my Dad,it gives me the tiniest little comfort. You are amazing for getting thru the last 7, sending 7 hugs your way :-) Ni Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2011 Hi All, I have decided to go to a nearby park and buy a helium balloon in my mom's favorite colour or picture on it and release it with a message on it... I am going to do something my mom liked to do or each at a favorite place... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted April 4, 2011 Report Share Posted April 4, 2011 Dear Shelley, I will celebrate and remember your Mother along with you on the 18th. I see all the work you are doing in your words. Good for you Shelley...I am just so proud. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 7, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2011 Hi Carol Ann, Thanks for all the nice things you have done for me, I am twelve days away from my mom's death anniversary and I am constantly thinking of memories and wondering what it would be like to talk to her one last time to see what she thinks about how I am handling things down her... I think she would be happy with how I have done so far... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 10, 2011 Hi All, Well as most of you know it is coming up to the seventh year since I lost my mom, and at seven years I thought it would not hurt as much but there is still a unplesant feeling when the day comes... I get so upset and want her with me, last year I kept really busy and took just a little time to remember her and I was okay with that and I guess if this is the way it has to be than so be it.. Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 15, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 15, 2011 Hi All, Just wanted to say that I am feeling really low right now, I am really missing my mom now and really needs someone to understand what I am feeling.. Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted April 15, 2011 Report Share Posted April 15, 2011 Shelley, dear, I hope you've read the message I posted to you in another thread. I'm sorry that you're having such a difficult time right now. I just read something that made me think of you, and I hope you'll read this, too: The Highway of Life: Get Back On the Bus by Maureen Hunter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 16, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 16, 2011 Hi All, Just wanted you to know that I am going to be okay on the day and that I am a plan to do things that will help me get through it.. First of all I am going to get a balloon and a copy of my mom's favorite song so i can listen to it.. I am going to go to the park and listen to her favorite song and say a prayer and release the balloon.. I am than going to the local food bank and donate some food and tell them it is it the memory of my mom... I than will go see a movie and go out for dinner.. Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 18, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 18, 2011 Hi All, Well it is April 18th and it has been six years since I said my final good byes and what a day so far... I spend some of it at the local hospital getting tests done, some of it at the local library reading a book, so of it at the mall window shopping and the rest of it so far thinking of everything I have gone through these past six years and wondering what my mom would think of the way I lived my life without her... I did do something in her memory too and now I am at home about to watch her favorite movie on tv waiting to receive a phone call session from my therapist.. I had a really bad weekend and so Suzanne is calling me for a talk.. shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted April 18, 2011 Report Share Posted April 18, 2011 Hi Shelley sending you big hugs on what I know is such a difficult day.you're Mom is proud of you Shelley,You have survived this and continue to do so,it's not been easy,it's been and continues to be a long hard road but you are doing it and that is something to be proud of. I hope you can enjoy the movie,I'd like to think your Mom is sitting right there with you watching it. Love and comfort to you Niamh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 18, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 18, 2011 Thanks Niamh, I am trying to get myself back on that bus of life but sometimes I just miss it by a few minutes and than I have to wait for the next chance.. I do believe my mom is looking down at me and saying that she wants me to happy... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 Shelley dear, over the weekend I read a review in The New York Times of a book that was written by Meghan O'Rourke about the loss of her mother Barbara. I've not yet read the book, but when I read the review by Gail Caldwell (a wonderful writer herself) I thought of you. At the end of her review Gail writes, In Barbara O'Rourke's last days, Meghan tells her, weeping, "I'm going to miss you so much" — expecting tears and consolation in return. Instead her mother is still. "I know," she tells her, then says it again. This bare-bones scene reminded me of the young child who takes a painful fall and then wails for reassurance. You're O.K., the good-enough mother will say. You're O.K. "The Long Goodbye" is an elegiac depiction of a drama as old as life, wherein the mother's first job is to raise a daughter strong enough to outlast her. Hmmmmmmm. "The mother's first job is to raise a daughter strong enough to outlast her." In your case, Shelley, I believe that your mother did an outstanding job of raising her daughter. You are so much stronger than you think you are, and I hope you will embrace that strength as the finest tribute you can pay to your mother now. That is her legacy to you, Shelley. Honor it, and stay strong, even as you keep learning how to live without her physical presence in your life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 19, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 Hi Marty, I am going to make my mom proud of me, I am going to be the strong and caring person she taught me to be... Thanks for all the encouragement.. Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted April 30, 2011 Report Share Posted April 30, 2011 Shelley, dear, I thought you might like to know that Maureen Hunter has written a follow-up to her post, "The Highway of Life: Get Back on the Bus," here: Surviving Loss: How to Get Back on the Bus When We Are Grieving Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted May 2, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 2, 2011 Thanks Marty for always thinking of me when I need it most. I read the article and it was great help... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilac Posted May 6, 2011 Report Share Posted May 6, 2011 Wow Shelley,7yrs,I can't imagine that one day I too will be saying 7years. I like to think of every year now as being one year closer to seeing my Dad,it gives me the tiniest little comfort. You are amazing for getting thru the last 7, sending 7 hugs your way :-) Ni That's a great way of looking at things, anniversary closer to seeing your loved one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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