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3 Month Anniversary

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To You All,

My Jack died 3 months ago today. I can hardly believe those words when I write them. When I got up this morning the tears began to flow – I can realize he is gone in my mind – but my heart apparently is too broken to accept the fact – at least on this anniversary.

I know this is part of the roller coaster emotions that are especially part of the first year – the year of firsts – but it does not make it any easier when the tears are uncontrollable – and they were this morning. The time when I first wake up is always the hardest for me – it’s the realization – again – that he is gone and I must find a path without him.

To mark this day I have a group of friends coming by the house to help me make 25 packets of Potpourri that I will be giving away to some of our friends, family and some of Jacks special customers. We took some of the Roses from Jacks “Celebration of Life” Ceremony and are using that along with some other flowers and then spraying it with Jacks Favorite cologne (Drakkar) to make “Jacks Potpourri”. I will also be given a way a few of Jacks shirts to these special people who are helping me today – they too want something of this Special Man to remember. One of them is going to make a pillow out of his shirt – what a neat idea.

This is just one of the many ways I’m trying to bring some memorial to Jack – and share it with some of the closest people that were part of his life.

And so life continues – always missing Jack – and always remembering him and making him part of my life as I move forward.

My best to you all,

John (Dusky on here)

Love you Jack

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John, I'm sorry for your loss. I admire your strenght, it is wonderful that you are able to mark the anniversary the way you did. In the first 8 months I wasn't even able to see anybody or answer the phone - well I still rather spend time by myself, I feel more comfortable that way. I can't cry in front of other people, and I hate it that I have to pretend that I'm ok - that everything is normal. I was expecting that the world would stop, because it's such an empty and meaningless place without him. But the world didn't stop - like it didn't realise what happened. I am grateful for this forum, it's a place where I don't feel as someone from another planet. Though I havent' been able to write or even read much lately. Thank you for your enccouraging post. Take care!

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I think it's neat that you are remembering him like you are. None of us will ever forget our loved ones, they live on in our hearts and memories.

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