6-month Anniversary

[Dusky]

Hello to you all,

Yesterday was the 6-month anniversary of the death of my partner and best friend – Jack. It was a difficult day to maneuver through but also a day to remember that he is still with me in how I live my life and in what I say and do. He continues on in me. In the past I have made reference to songs/pomes that I hope some day to have published or put to music. In memory of Jack I am going to share one of these pomes/songs I have written as a tribute to him - and to the love we shared – and to provide hope and reassurance that all your loved ones continue on IN YOU as well.

Here is my song/poem written on 1-9-06 in honor of “My Jack” – here ya go Baby:

“I See You In Myself”

Your face I cannot feel or see - but cloths you wore remain

The space you filled is all about – but it’s not quite the same

What we had then - when you were here - was special and unique

What I have now – that you are gone - has left me here to seek

I had to clean the memories out - and place them on a shelf

My heart – it has been stored away – like a plastic Christmas elf

I hope my heart will not grow old there - sitting in the dark

The memories that I placed it with – were meant to heal a heart

(Refrain)

My heart and soul remembers well – the items on that shelf

You touched and wore - what I now store – “I See You On The Shelf”

I could not bear to see them go – these items that you graced

I could not bear to let them stay – I had to find a place

The heart that had to watch you die – now had to do the rest

With loving hands and broken heart - I pressed them to my chest

Pictures - Wallets - Rings and Chains - plus stands of golden locks

With tear drops falling on my cheeks - I placed them in that box

I slipped in all the memories - of each item that was you

And then I took this broken heart - and left that with you too

(Refrain)

My heart and soul remembers well – the items on that shelf

You touched and wore - what I now store – “I See You On The Shelf”

I know I put that box away – up there upon that nook

But somehow I still find you here – in strange places that I look

I saw you in the mirror staring back at me today

A piece of you had found its way - to linger and to stay

The little things you said and did - could not be hidden there

To boxes on a shelf so high – my memories are so clear

The heart I had so gently placed in boxes – there to rest

Had found its way down off that shelf - and back into my chest

The you - that moved - and walked - and talked – were not up on that shelf

That box - could not hold what you were – “I See You In Myself”

I see you in the mirror staring back at me today

A piece of you had found its way - to linger and to stay

The you - that moved and walked and talked – were not up on that shelf

That box - could not hold what you were – “I See You In Myself”

(Refrain)

My heart and soul remembers well – the items on that shelf

You touched and wore - what I now store – “I See You In Myself”

Copywrite - John R. Davis – 1/9/06

“Because he has been here, I will be different than I would have been. I will have to become his legacy. He travels with me into tomorrow. He may have died, but love never ends.”

John – Dusky is my handle on here

Jack - I love you - more than you will ever know – lots lots.

[Charlie]

Dusky,

I read your poem and the tears really came. It was a lovely tribute to the person you loved so deeply. Even though they are gone we still hold them near to us in our hearts and they will always be a part of us.

Thank you for your wonderful words, you are truly gifted to be able to put into words what we all feel inside.

Grace

[kayc]

How beautiful that is! And how it conveys my heart. I can hardly bear to look at those things that were his...the treasured memories. Sometimes I wonder how long I'll grieve or how much of it I'm trying to push from me. We had a large two drawer chest that contained our special momentos...one drawer for him, one for me, and in it were pictures, letters, cards, special things...I cannot go in to his drawer, it is too much. His life could not have been reduced to the "things" that I cleaned out, his clothes, his fishing gear, the things he loved, but rather it is in our memories, the things that can never be wiped away, the things that exist for all time, our meeting, our courtship, our honeymoon, the beauty of our marriage, the enjoyable weekends we devoted to each other...the understanding, exchanged knowing glances, and always, always, holding hands. Memories of sitting up with each other when one of us was sick. Memories of sharing our hearts with each other and staying up late into the night to talk to each other. Memories of wonderful shared cups of coffee or enjoying a snack together. Memories of sleeping through videos (we never could seem to stay awake! )

Thank you for sharing that with us Dusky, it means much to us as well.

[Devi]

Hi Dusky,

What a beautiful poem!!! I really relate to Being what it was I shared with my Beloved.. Finding all of the things I loved about Him in me. I am His living legacy. For me it has been 6 months, as well, since my fiance passed on. Every day I light candles for Him and honor His memory, past and present. It is still the beginning for me and yet so much has transformed... Well thank you for your inspireing words! Your creativity is surely a blessing for you.

Love is Real and Eternal ~ Devi