Today 1/2/16 birthday

[Thwrangler]

Well today would have been my moms 67 birthday. 

And tomorrow she will be gone for exactly two months. 

Its been so hard these past two months. 

I miss her so much and I still blame myself for her dying. 

It's been so hard on me since this all started on June 12th (4 days after my birthday).  She was in and out of the hospital for 2 straight months!  

I am so sad and lost without her especially today!

[kayc]

I am sorry, I know how hard those special days are.  My mom's birthday is coming up next month.

[Mom's angel]

Birthdays are hard. I don't know why but most death are around or near a person's birthday or some featival.

My mom's birthday is in Oct and she died in Nov.. She just turned 42.

Blaming comes from the thought that "there was this one thing that if I would have not done or would have done then she might be alive".. I have gone through it. 

But there's nothing we can do about it and that hurts.

[Ceili]

Birthdays are hard. Tomorrow it will be 10 months since mom died and I think that I found New Years Eve the hardest. No idea why. Went to bed at 9 pm. My own birthday is on Tuesday. I feel a little sad but mainly because I am getting old!. We leave for  a week of vacation in Florida on Wednesday to stay with my husbands dad. Looking forward to some sun. You will all be in my thoughts and prayers.

[kayc]

It does seem like most deaths are near their birthday.  My FIL, MIL, and husband all died within a week or so of their birthday.

I guess we never know what day will be the hardest...I made it ten months into my journey after my husband died and finally major revolted against having Easter!  It was like it was the last straw, so we ignored Easter and I had my kids up the following weekend, we didn't mention Easter.  Weird!

[deb1]

I'm so sorry for your loss... I haven't been through my mom's birthday yet, but from what I felt on NYE I guess I have an idea.

But I don't know why you blame yourself. She was having a hard time for 2 months and you took her out to have a nice time with family and friends. You gave her a little extra happiness. It's not at all your fault. It could have been in her sleep before you had the opportunity to give her that. 

Of course you want it to be different, god, I know I wish to be different, but hold on the thought that she for sure appreciated you trying to get her mind out of what was happening before.

She knows you love her and she loves you too.