Widow2015

Good Lord kayc: You have got to have a change of bad luck soon. How much more can you and sweet Kodie endure? It's sad the dog has to be removed from their home, but the children, you and Kodie, need to feel safe. I'm not an expert on dogs, but the poor animal needs rehoming/retraining or something. Now, who will be around to watch out for you without your full use of your hand? So glad Kodie wasn't injured. P.S. Thank you for comments on finalization of my home sale. Painful day, but now onto learning a new way to live in a very different environment. Take care, Dee.

Karen: I read your sweet story of your memory of a neighbor and how you can recall what a kind man JW was. Even though JW died so tragically, the story was beautiful in that he has remained in your memory for his kindness. Thank you for sharing your feelings with us. Sadly, life's saddest moments can be just a blip that happened and leaves us grieving for a long time. During this past year I have had to downsize and remove so many items from my past happy life. In spite of removing so many memorable items, I still brought too many items with me; my new place has begun to look a lot like the tv program, "Hoarders". I tell my grandkids and my kids, everything I have here with me has a "story". The rest of my years I will try to be more dedicated to disposing of more items. Yesterday I signed the closing papers on the sale of my house so I have promised myself to spend more time clearing a path so I don't stumble and fall. Was a tough day, bittersweet in so many ways. Hugs, Dee

kayc: Now when you say vents, I visualize vents are on the roof of your house? I hope I am wrong in my thinking. I hope you don't have to get on your roof. Dee😱

Gwen: Whenever the ASPCA commercial/ad comes on I grab the remote control and shut off TV. My heart just can't stand to see the suffering animals. The Subaru commercials make me smile too. My very favorite commercial features a child in the hospital and the doctor/nurse says the treatment will be changed. Next in comes this beautiful brown and white dog to the child's bed. The beautiful dog has a face like my Maddie. Tears and smiles follow everytime. Dee

Marg: Wonderful news about your Kelli. Can only try to imagine what a relief you and your family must be feeling . Thanks for sharing such good news. Dee

Gwen: Like Karen, I'm glad they are giving you a little more time before you are released from the hospital. You know good vibes are coming your way as you continue recovery. Hugs, Dee

Gwen: I'm not going to congratulate you too much on getting to go home next week cause I can sense your apprehension. But, that big step forward can hopefully mean you are slowly moving forward to a life that offers you even a small chance to be the person you want to be. It is my hope some of your recovery pain with gradually subside. Last Tuesday I went to my appointment to my new retinal specialist that is located closer to my new home. I set up a driver with a medical transportation company since I need a driver to and from appointments. I was so worried about every little part of the adventure. What if the driver can't find me? What if I am late and miss my appointment? etc., etc. She picked me up a few minutes early and got me inside to the right office in plenty of time. When the appointment was over, she got me home safe and sound. There would've been no way I could've gotten myself home safely cause both eyes were dilated. My bad eye, was dilated twice for an extra test. I had a few minutes to wait for the driver. As I sat waiting I touched my face and realized I didn't have my glasses on. I found my way back up on the elevator all blurry eyed and retrieved my glasses from the reception desk. This getting old is not really fun! LOL😎 Dee

Marg: So relieved that Kelli wasn't harmed, and hope the woman and the child were ok. It is so crazy anywhere anymore. This kind of stuff makes me want to stay in my little house and not go anywhere, ever. Dee

kayc: So relieved to read you were able to have your conversation with your sister. It is so evident you love her and care about her. Dementia is such an unpredicable monster, and to have to deal with her vision issues is only adding to her confusion and fear. Dee

Karen: Oh my, "9/11" has happiness for you and sadness for you ........ at the time when our country grieves. Dee

Disbelief is the explanation of what happened that morning. I was on my way to a dental appointment when my son called us at home to turn on TV. All during the appointment it was still unbelievable this could be happening to us. The United States was no longer that safe place in the world. 😭 Dee

Gwen and Marg: Yes, you are both stuck with everyone caring about you. Each time I sign in to the Forum I love to see how much everyone cares for each other with a comment or a suggestion. Marg, I hope the "lost way" you're experiencing right now will change for you. I understand being one of the eldest, how changes in our life can make us feel. These past couple of weeks I've learned of at least 6 serious health changes in friends or family. More reminders of sadness adding to our sadness. Hugs, Dee

kayc: It is so sad that you once again have to lose another loved one to this horrendous illness. As I watched my mother fade into a different person over a period of years I will never forget the look in her eyes. This beautiful sweet, caring little dignified Southern Lady developed into a totally confused, lost and frightened human. It's a strong concern I hope I will never have to have my children go through. My Mother would show her anger towards some hospital staff, but hardly ever showed any anger towards us unless during the "sundowning" time of day, her mood would change. Each person develops differently in this illness evidently. I am happy to read your BP has returned to a more manageable reading. You are the kind of sister I wished I could have had. Hugs, Dee

Gwen: Getting dressed on ur own sounds like great progress. Even a little progress is progress. I am hoping they will come up with something to help with the oxygen tank when you are stronger and able to walk on your own. Cheering you on. 👏 Dee

Thank you Gwen for the kind thoughts. I haven't felt strong through this venture. There have been times I have questioned my decision to move. But, then I have to remind myself I had no choice. Without my dear Bob, I knew I had to make this difficult decision. Unlike you, I fortunately had help from my son and some help from my daughter and son in law. Another positive, so far, is I have a real estate agent that has been really supportative of my situation. Right now I am spending most of my time changing addresses, telephone numbers, utilities, billing information, medical providers, etc., etc., working on an old laptop that is trying to quit on me. As we all know, trying to talk on the telephone to a human, is next to impossible. I'm keeping you in my thoughts as you face your struggles. "One Day @ a Time". Hugs, Dee This statement coming from you kayc is much appreciated. You always seem to say the right thing in each response to us here on the forum. Thank you. I am truly sorry your sister's illness has brought you two to this separation. Your health has got to be at the top of your list. Take care. Hugs, Dee

Gwen: I'm feeling your utter despair as you go through your daily schedule of recovery. And if the pain isn't enough, to top it off you have to deal with a "nurse" that shows little or no empathy. I can't begin to understand how you are dealing with all the obstacles but over the years/months you have posted, you have somehow managed to get through each day. Hopefully, as the days pass and some of your strength returns you will see a way to be back to being in your home. Your Mel will learn to accept a little less ball throwing by being her sweet shy girl and will be happy lying next to your chair. I have stated before I struggle with my religious beliefs, but I still try to ask God to please help me get through the next day. I have always admired those that strongly carried their faith. I hope your therapy session today was more manageable. Your sense of humor still creeps in. 😁 Hugs, Dee

Marg: So sorry to read Kelli fell. She sounds like she is having more than her share of a bad time with the moving problems and now her knee injury. I agree, we never stop worrying about our kids. Dee

Marg: Now that I am finally moved out of my house in town, and living in my little manufactured home, I hope (knocking on wood, too) there won't be any reason for me to move again. Your Granddaughter sounds pretty amazing with her skills to be able to assemble your fan. It's pretty evident she and all of your children hold a special place in your heart. You are blessed to have them so close and willing to help when asked. Dee

Marg: Loved your comment and it is so good to hear from you. Sorry your kids are involved in a difficult move. Moving is difficult enough without having to deal with unplanned problems and legal issues. I can imagine how relieved you were to learn that your son's medical test was normal. KarenK: Looking back on my last year when I began planning my move, I wish I had started the process at least 3 years ago. I might have been less exhausted, confused and stressed. Just glad the majority of it is behind me. Dee

Gwen: Just as I was going to sign off my laptop I noticed you had posted. So sorry to read how your struggles are on going. I don't believe my decision to move from a home I loved is anywhere comparable to what you have had to endure. I want to believe your choice for the surgery will give you, Mel and your birds, some resemblance of a life if not at least a chance of some kind of life with some purpose and joy of accomplishment. I seem to be adjusting a little more each day as I settle in with my new routine. I was able to feel useful today. Now that school has started, I meet my Granddaughter's school bus in the afternoon. As I slowly drove down to the bus stop there were a pair of deer walking across the road. It gave me a moment of joy to see such beautiful creatures so close. Hope tomorrow will be a better day for you and hoping to see Marg back with her word salads. She is missed. Dee

KarenK: Seems right now that's what drags me out of bed every morning. The sweet memories of how my Bob always looked forward to his day. I feel guilty thinking I'm the one here and he's not. What a wonderful gift that a long time acquaintance of your Mom painted "your cabin". I can imagine you losing yourself in the memories of what used to be there. Unfortunately, progress is not always good for us who used to know a quieter, calmer time. I could be wrong, but I kinda remember her saying she lived in North Louisiana close to Arkansas ?? If so, she might've gotten some wind and rain. The strongest winds and torrential rain and flooding seems to have gone more towards Mississippi, Alabama and Tennessee. I hope I'm right. I grew up in New Orleans and had just missed Katrina years ago. I had been to my high school class reunion in June, and Katrina hit in August. My cousin lives in Lafayette and they escaped the worst of Ida. Hoping to soon hear from a high school friend. She and her husband live on a bayou in a home built on stilts in Slidell, LA.

Karen: Yes, I am relieved that I am physically finished moving items I wanted to keep. The neighborhood, (wooded, gravel road), I'm now living is absolutely 100% different from old neighborhood, (paved street at end of a cul-de-sac in city). I'm trying to convince myself it is a challenge to get used to a new way to exist independently as much as possible and live the best I can and not be a nuisance to my son. I am thankful to spend more time with my two grandkids. Your leaving your cabin must've been so painful as it signaled the end to a part of your life where you were happiest. Hugs, Dee

Marty: Thank you for sharing the article on Ways to Say Goodbye to a home. Since my move has been over months due to many issues, I was happy to read I had done some of the suggestions. Early on I had dug up some peonies that belonged to my beloved Father in Law and are now planted at the entry of my little new home as well along with a variety of lawn ornaments. So many warm memories shared there will go with me. Thank you for thinking of me. 😍 Dee

Gwen: I understand the fear of losing your special earrings. But, I agree with kayc, there could not be any choices you have made in your past so awful to create your suffering. I do believe it is just life that throws challenges at us. The fact that you made the decision to face this surgery and make the detailed plans for your animals, home and transportation to the hospital indicates your amazing abilities. We here have wished you had someone to physically drop in to check on you, (don't even know if that is possible with Covid rearing it's ugly head now??). Hoping you will soon remember where the earrings are.........in a safe, special place. In all these months of moving to my new home, packing boxes, unpacking boxes I am amazed as I unpack to find something I haven't a clue I packed. I intentionally insisted on doing my own packing and unpacking of boxes so I would not be overwhelmed, but unfortunately I am right where I had hoped not to be. But, I am moved out of the house and the house is on the market as of Saturday. Thursday, as I drove away realizing I would never sleep there again, I looked straight ahead in hopes of not making eye contact with any neighbors. The tears were streaming down my face. Before the house sale closes, my son and I will have a few more items to move out. My plan is to say goodbye at that time, if I can. Keeping good thoughts for you. Hugs, Dee

Oh Gwen, so sorry to read what you are going through in recovery. Each day sounds so frustrating for you. I wish someone could be there to speak for you and be your advocate when you needed care or needed someone to speak up for a nurse. You are so strong to face this recovery alone. I know some day you will look back and realize how strong you are. Please keep remembering you are in my thoughts. Hugs and hoping for a much better day tomorrow. Dee