Margm

I will be dead if I don't. I fight below the level of diabetes on every four-month lab work. I sure don't do it for fun. I miss raw vegetables, especially celery and have not had a wonderful salad in 10 years. Do you possibly use men's thick gloves to do all that work? Makes it harder to do but might lessen the injuries.

Kevin, is this what happens every year? You have massive snow (water) and then you have massive fires? We have massive flooding. I guess strange things happen wherever you live. I did love those water coolers in Albuquerque, and probably around Karen's home. But, the takeaway was it took water and water was not in high supply. They were so comfortable to sleep in at night, and I think Albuquerque is about 5,000 feet. Maybe more. I remember the doctors having people with heart trouble moving to lower levels. And, I'm on here trying to kill time to face the day and people with their petty gripes and fusses. Mama cannot choose sides anymore. So both get angry at Mama. Good. Means I don't have to talk to them.

As you know, my diet is high in carbs. I can have meat protein. The only vegetables I can have are potatoes, green beans, cooked carrots, cooked/pickled beets, and all the sweets I want as long as there are no nuts or seeds. I go to the doc every four months for lab work check and mostly blood sugar check. He realizes I cannot eat healthy. My mainstay is eggbeaters and instant grits. No corn whatsoever but can have grits and I have learned to make a "grits bread" from that. I fixed a potatoes, green beans, carrots and mushroom soup, HB meat, and beef broth soup last week that was actually good. I cut down on the size of it and had it two days. I hate to cook, and the frozen dinners all have seeds of some sort in them or corn. One day I just drank three Glucerna's. Probably the healthiest I have eaten. If I eat wrong, I suffer terribly. It is TMI to tell you how, but I do place a cross in my bathroom and say, "Please God, I promise not to eat that again." I have 13 crosses in my bathroom and have not had to add others in a long while. Propranolol helps my essential tremor, but my stay in the bathroom was four hours. I also had to cut out caffeine. Addict that I am, I miss that "lift" but cannot handle the shakes. My old reliable meds do not hurt me. Anything new heads to my gut and a prolonged stay in the essential room. Having a lot of (my kids) sibling rivalry and trouble right now. I do have to take care of my sister constantly, and my granddaughter is still here. Too much wear and tear on this nearly 82-year-old woman. I cannot run away from it. When I was fighting cancer in 1982, I had a lot of family troubles with my dad with cancer too. He was a mean cancer victim (like my sister) though and will have been gone 40 years day after tomorrow. Family troubles seem to be the norm with me, and I wrote that little ditty back then: "I'm not that important, life does go on, if I wasn't here then I'd be gone." Written out of pure exhaustion. I'm there again. And I'm still here. Gotta take my sister for surgery in south "big city" where all the traffic is. She will be impossible to handle, of course. But I am all she has, and we are our brother's keepers. As far as the LGBT (QRS) and whatever letters they add, you just live and let live and thank God it was not something you ever wanted to be. ADDENDUM: Kay, listen to Karen!!!!!

Marty, I hope I don't get thrown off. Sorry folks, my vocational aspirations were just above the floor. Spent 43 years in medical transcription, and loved it.

I have a sister who is bi. She told me it was wonderful and the whole world was open. That was many years ago. Then, my daughter has gay vibes, sometimes I'm positive, sometimes I'm even more positive. My friend has a gay grandson, and she said you hate the sin but love the sinner. I'm not on that level. I accept it. My nephew, Billy's sister's son is gay. I know it is a surprise to the older generation, like me. But, damn I do accept it. I never knew there was a choice, in fact, I'm afraid I would have liked to dance in the cages above the floor with white high boots and pasties. That was when we had the Whisk-A-Go-Go's. I had the figure to do it then, but I'd make more money at it now. Couldn't do that with a deacon father. So, actually nothing surprises me and I totally accept it.

I saw it on TV. That was how I wanted to see it.

All the bayous, creeks, rivers are overflowing. Wish we had an underground pipeline to send water to states that need it.

Billy and I never missed "Heartland." It is clean, interesting, and may show some of the United States, but think most all of the actors and the scenery is in Canada. It is beautiful. Try soft macaroni-and-cheese Karen. Marshmallow sweets too. I don't think any on the "keto" diet, but to live, I cannot eat anything on the keto diet. That colon rupture makes carbs mostly all I can eat. I sure miss my salads, celery, and those raw vegetable dips.

Have faith Karen. Your gums are getting tougher. Billy's Uncle Chan could eat cracked ice with his gums and corn on the cob. That oral surgeon (because I didn't want to shell out $9,000 for screw in's) told me to just leave my teeth out then. You will get a fit. Billy never had a moment's trouble with his, but we did start on a 900-mile one way vacation, and he had left his teeth at home. We had just got on interstate when he thought about them. We turned around. I could have not adapted to the screw-ins because I can only take antibiotics IM. Too much infection happens. You're in pain for a long time too, and then to hold them in they put denture coverings. No guarantee's either. For $9,000 I expected to at least get free oil checks.

It is my son's son. We helped with his care until he was 5-6 and he lived with us when he was 16. His dad lived with us too. His first, and only year, at the small country school he won the art award. He had promise as an artist, but I think the bipolar was handed down from my dad to my son, to my grandson. He was drug seeking at that time too. His dad took him to live with him, but my son was sober and his son was making it hard to stay sober, so he went back to where his mom had remarried and moved to California. She called me once and asked me not to send cash gifts because he bought dope with it. I understood. He has lived many years in this existence and somehow stayed alive. Out of one treatment center he told us he did not want to stay sober. It was his choice.

Still do not know where my grandson is. Beautiful, sweet boy/man. He knows to do something to go to jail for winter. Obviously has street smarts (or dumbs). In California. Love the pup. All we can do is worry. Found out he has a son, teenager now. The relatives who raised him do not want my son to meet him. My son understands. So many years we fought his own drug addiction. Hep C treatments nearly killed him, but he respected Billy enough to let us help him get away from his drug sources and take him to the VA when his gallbladder had grown to his liver. That was back when the treatments/chemo took 11 months. Some days it just warmed my heart to hear him snoring. I knew he was still alive. But now his own son's life haunts him every day. There is a song that the late Joe Diffie sang that reminds me of these problems. A stanza of it stands out: "So here's to all the soldiers Who have ever died in vain The insane locked up in themselves The homeless down on Main To those who stand on empty shores And spit against the wind And those who wait forever For ships that don't come in. I think of my grandson when I hear it.

I love it. Both of them.

He is still a very handsome fellow. I remember his baby picture that fitted his name. Thank you. Keep family close as you can. Sometimes they pull away on their own. Have not heard from my grandson in about a year, and he was in jail (for the winter). Somehow, long time druggies, if they are allowed to live long term, they find ways to take care of themselves. Not our choice. It is theirs. Breaks our hearts though. His dad thinks and worries every day, as I'm sure his mom does too. He is well into his 30's now though.

Well Kevin, sounds like you get along with everyone. Recent picture of Atlas, please.

So true Kay. (Can you believe it, only three words.) Had to add more to be "myself."