Survey: Spousal/Parental Death

[MartyT]

If interested, you are invited to participate in the following anonymous online survey:

My name is Veronica and I am from Boston, Massachusetts. In January 2011 my dad passed away very suddenly. He had a heart attack in our basement on the morning I was due to start work at my new job. My family has a motto which is "there are no problems, only solutions," and therefore I have used my experience with my dad's death as a motivating force in helping me become who I am today.

Currently I am a doctoral candidate in Denver where I study family communication. As the final step in my 23 years of schooling, I am in the process of collecting data for my dissertation. Driven from my own experiences, and from substantial gaps in research, my dissertation explores how parent-child pairs experience spousal/parental death. Specifically, there is a lot of research out there that explores familial death, but nearly all of this work looks at death as an individual experience, and, as those of us who have experienced family loss know, death is an incredibly relational experience. Further, this project has also helped me come to terms with my dad's death, and has given meaning to his loss in ways that other coping techniques could not. Therefore, I am reaching out to you all to see if you might help me in my personal and professional journey. 

I am hoping to reach out to parents and children who have experienced spousal/parental death and encourage them to take an anonymous online survey. Because I am interested in the relational experience, part of participation in this survey requires that you recruit your child or parent to also take part in the survey. However, because the survey is hosted online, parents and children do not have to be together to take the survey. Although there is no limit on the time that has passed since the death, both the parent and the child must be at least 18 years of age or older when taking the survey. The survey can be found here (tinyurl.com/familylosssurvey), and is anonymous and confidential. After completion you can also enter to win one of 10 $20 gift cards.

I very much appreciate you taking the time to consider participating in my project, and being a part of my journey. If you would like more information please email me at vdroser@du.edu, or comment below.

[Margm]

I will take this survey, except not right now.  I have read it and understand she is searching for information, but somehow my mind is stonewalling right now.  I'm not wanting to explore yet.  I definitely am not interested in any gift cards for taking the survey.  Somehow I'm gonna have to think on it.  I don't know why (personal insanity) but it kind of opens wounds right now and I might have questions, but also am not sure I want answers.  And, I understand it is totally anonymous, somehow it hit a nerve.  I understand it is totally of our own free will.  

Grief is a strange animal that can consume a person with just a word.  

[Guest]

35 minutes ago, Marg M said:

 Grief is a strange animal that can consume a person with just a word.  

Man alive, can I ever relate to your statement I'm quoting here Marg. I vaguely seem to remember how I fixated over the word "hallucination" a few days ago.How Marty was able to forgive me for that episode I will never know. She's a saint!

Darrel

[MartyT]

I understand completely, dear Marg. Your first priority is to take care of yourself, and only you can know what feels okay to you ~ or not. No pressure!

This survey is entirely voluntary and is aimed only at those who may be interested in sharing their experiences (so that others can learn from us), and who would feel comfortable enough to participate. I post it here only as a courtesy to the doctoral student who asked for permission to do so.  ♥

[Margm]

I knew it was not written for me.  Mama used to say if they want to punish me, just whip the person beside me and it will hurt me the most.  That is because I pick up guilt strewn around as if it was gold.  Bad habit.  

[Widowedbysuicide]

Veronica in Boston

I'm interested in taking your survey, along with my son.  I would like to be able to read the questions first and have the opportunity to think about my answers.  Without the six digit code I am not able to go beyond the first three questions.

I would also be interested in reading your dissertation if that would be possible.

You may reply here through Marty or have her reply to me in a personal message on here.

[Veronica1228]

5 hours ago, Widowedbysuicide said:

Veronica in Boston

I'm interested in taking your survey, along with my son.  I would like to be able to read the questions first and have the opportunity to think about my answers.  Without the six digit code I am not able to go beyond the first three questions.

I would also be interested in reading your dissertation if that would be possible.

You may reply here through Marty or have her reply to me in a personal message on here.

Hi Marita, 

Thank you for reaching out. You are welcome to do a test of the survey, and enter "TEST" in the 6-digit code box. That way you will be able to go through the survey, and I will be able to remove it when I do my analysis. 

I would love to share my dissertation with you once it is complete (likely in the summer it will become public). You are welcome to email me (my email is in the above post, and in the first page of the survey), that way I can have a contact for where to send it once it is complete. I will also be creating accessible materials from my results to share with the grief community, and would be happy to share those as well! 

Thank you again for your interest in taking the survey. I appreciate your support!