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Hello. I was surfing the web and typed in grief and wound up here. I lost my mother to cancer when I was 19. I was young and blocked alot of that out. You'd think that would be a wake up call as to how precious life is. My life went on, I got married..felt the loss more at that time. I used to be a wreck on Mother's Day, until I had my first daughter. Luckily my father was very active in her life and I was able to see the joy in the circle of life. Then when I was pregnant with my second daughter he became very ill. He died of cirosis, which is a horrible way to go. He died six weeks before she came.I was 33. So here I was with this new life trying to move forward..Then the holidays hit and they always bring on the tears. I made it through because of my children, I live for them. My husband has a hard time comprehending my grief. He still has his parents and his grandparents. I have no one. My friends all have their parents.I try not to dwell on it, but it really happened. So what can I do? I be the best parent I can be. I tell my older daughter stories of when I was young, so she knows everything about me. I keep journal's for both of them. I'll be honest the 2nd one got jipped on the photo's, but we love them both the same!There's so many questions I never asked my parents. I'm considering going to a psychic for closure. I read the book " Don't kiss them goodnight" and I believe in mediums. Okay. I feel better having that info off my chest. Thankyou. God Bless you all.

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Awe MaryFran, I am so so sorry for your loss. I too have lost both of my parents. It is hard to go on with every day tasks, yet I too live for my children.

Never say you are nobody's child. You are still & always will be their child. They may not be here for you to talk with, hug & hold, but they are with you & always will be.

I wish you all the best,

Tootie

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Hi MaryFran,

Like everyone in here, I too know what it's like to lose a parent. My younger sister and I (we are 25 and 15) lost both our parents over the last five years. Neither one made it to 50. We only have one grandparent left and like you, we don't have a lot of close family. I empathize with you and my heart truly goes out.

I want to compliment you because you sound like you are a wonderful mother. My sister and I were raised mostly by our mother alone.....those bonds are very tight. I admire people who can take adversity and direct it into a positive energy or outcome and it sounds like you are doing that for your girls....maybe having been through what you have has helped you in that way. Afterall, life is a journey and a growing process....the entire time.

It's easy to feel like an orphan....and on many days I truly feel that sting, as I am sure you do as well. It can be lonely...and scary and just plain unfair or depressing. But I just wanted to remind you that you are still somebody's child.....you are God's child. Neither life nor death or anything inbetween can change that. And you are deeply loved.

May God help you find peace and joy, and even when you can't...may He be your solice in the storm.

My love and prayers,

Kelly

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What you all have said has brought tears to my eyes. I lost both my parents too, and I'm barely 30 yrs old. I'm single, and at times feel like I have nothing to live for. It's only been 3 months, and it's been tough. I'm constantly trying to deal with my loss. I'm trying to find a firm ground/foundation to stand on. It's hard, and any slight change can throw me off and set my emotions flying. I'm always striving to have a normal day, but I'm not even sure what normal feels like anymore. Sometimes I believe in some form or another, that I'm avoiding or denying that my mom died. I...I....I... just can't get myself to bare it. I go to counseling and I read forums, but I just still can't swallow it. No way.....not my parents ! Something like this can't happen to someone twice ! We were just starting to have a 'normal' life after my dad died. Looking forward to possibly having kids so my mother wouldn't be lonely no more. But nah, just didn't happen. Dreams were crushed. I just don't get it?! I miss both my parents !

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I also lost both of my parents and it is a blow. My father was a scoundrel but I still miss his laugh and conversation. I so wanted him to know my son. I think that is the thing I feel the worst about. I did not have live grandparents so I think that is very special. But we go on....while it seems impossible now for some magical reason after a while it does not hurt so much. I actually went through a period where I felt guilty that I was not suffering more. That is when I thought about what my parents wanted for me and that was to go on with my own life and not dwell in the past. I once was driving up to their grave and I had the strongest sense that my parents were telling me to go home and be with my family. So hang in there ... grief is natural and there is a natural way to go through and survive it.

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