Pandorasbox Posted March 30, 2006 Report Share Posted March 30, 2006 It's been a little over 6 weeks since my dad's sudden death, and I am still a wreck. My whole family is, especially my mom. I'm the only one nearby, all the time, and I should be going over to check on her, and see her more often, but I'm having a hard time getting past my own issues to do much of anything. I do call and talk to her at least once every day, usually more.What's worse is all this crime/court stuff seems to be coming to some sort of head, or at least I hope so. Well, I don't hope so, in that I wish that we weren't even in this mess, or that the perp would just plead, but if it's going to go anywhere else (trial), I'd rather get it done and over with. I imagine it will get pushed out, again, as the perp is trying to hire a new lawyer, right now, but there is a chance we could see the inside of a courtroom within the next couple of weeks. It's a double-edged sword, I tell ya. This stuff was going on long before my dad died, and he was a tremendous help through it all, and now we're approaching what's probably going to be the worst part, and my dad's not here. I'm still pretty much a walking zombie, from grief, and yet I still have this to deal with. At the same time, I do hope it's goes through now, and we get it over with. For one thing, having this hanging over our heads is compounding my grief over my dad, so maybe having it out of the way would help...?I have the feeling that this is going to get a whole lot more painful, before it starts to get better. I don't know how I'm going to make it through it all, as I'm doing good to keep putting one foot in front of the other, right now. This is what I wrote to my husband in an IM, this morning, "I'm stuck between having no desire to do anything, and the physical feeling of being stuck in molasses and not able to do much, with very much speed. Reluctant Slow-mo."How in the world do I steel myself from the inevitable pain of what's to come, all while dealing (badly) with my dad's death? Help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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