After the physical body

[JimJim]

I have been reading book after book, listening to forums on you tube, as to what happens to us after the physical body stops working? it has been only a little over a year since I lost my Beautiful wife Nancy, we didn't have any children after 25 years together, we were too busy spoiling one another! so all of our time was spent together, going through all the good and the bad, we never once at any time felt hopeless, as I do now! we always knew that as long as we were together, we could get through anything!! I have been attempting to find ways of communicating with her, as I am now a firm believer in the Afterlife, I believe that she is always at my side, taking care of me as she always did, this is why I have chosen to remain steady in my marriage, she is still at my side, nothing has changed, only the physical presence has altered, but to ever bounce into another relationship, I firmly believe would be a disservice and a dishonor to the woman of my life, and besides I could never love another, she is the only woman for me!!! I believe that when I leave this planet she will be there waiting for me, and happy with my choices, as she will know the true depths of my Love, extended even beyond the physical body!! Thank you for letting me share this thought, as it is impossible for me to explain this to anyone, as they would not understand, and believe me I have tried. May you all have a restful and peaceful evening!! G-Night.

[widow'15]

JimJim:  I am sorry you are new to this forum because it means you are grieving the loss of a loved one.  I can feel your pain as you write how deeply you miss your wife, Nancy.  You have come to a place where we all understand the pain you are experiencing as you grieve your loss.  Your feeling hopeless is understandable.  I wish I had answers you ask about the Afterlife.  I have struggled with similar questions about the next life my self.  Please continue to come here and share your feelings, you are not alone.  Dee 

    

[Gwenivere]

I consider myself still married.  People outside of here would never understand that, you have to use widow or single.  I know I will not find another person.  Not looking to anyway.  I’m still in love.  I honor Steve by trying to still be me without him at my side.  I wear our promises to each other on my finger always.  

I've taken in the after life thinking many times.  The great unknown.  I want to believe there is something after this.  A big part of me says there is not.  Not in a way that is consciousness. We are energy.  It can’t be created or destroyed, but it’s form can change.  I don’t think I will ever see him again nor can he see me.  I wish I could change that and have some solace as you do, JimJim.  

As Dee said, I’m sorry as well you are here.  I love all these people, but I wish none of us were here for the obvious reason.  I’d miss the wit of some, the calming of others and the overall knowing I have a place to go with these painful feelings inside.  Had they not happened it would be the old saying.....you can’t miss what you never knew.  You are right.  No one 'out there' gets it, I surely didn’t til it happened to me.  All the little triggers keep coming after years of the biggies.  Things I forgot til they remind me of his absence.  Sometimes I wonder if he really existed or was it just a glorious fantasy of a perfect life.  The pain reminds me of the reality as well as pictures of us happy and smiling, no thoughts this could end.  I look at myself and see how half of me is gone.  

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on your love for your wife.  No matter what we each feel about what comes after this, that is the foundation of what we all share.  

 

[kayc]

One thing us grievers have learned is there is no right or wrong way to grieve, we must do it our way...whatever brings us the most comfort.  I had no idea what it was like until I went through it.  And differing relationships hit us differently...for one person, loss of parent might be the hardest, for most of us here, it is loss of spouse/partner, for me personally, loss of my dog hit me just as it did all those years ago when I lost George.  Another person might not understand that.  Arlie filled my days/nights with companionship, loyalty, he was with me day and night for 10 1/2 years after losing my spouse, plus he was the perfect dog for me, quiet, communicative, loving, goofy, fun, and so so smart!  People who have not experienced loss of spouse cannot begin to realize all the ways in which it affects our lives...the person we talked over our day with, cuddled with, shared our sexuality with, communicated without a word being necessary, the person who did the other half of the chores, brought home half the bacon, was your companion, shared days, nights, weekends, holidays with.  We lost so much when we lost our partner.  Going into old age w/o that person means no one to drive us to surgery or make sure we're okay once home.  Or if you can't drive at night (like me), that person who would have drove you places.  Now I simply miss fun things because there is no one to drive me.  However we can get through this...has our blessing here, because we get it.  The only caution is alcohol because it's a depressant and that's something we don't need!