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December 1 Today Is For Bob


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I add my sentiments too, to Bob.

Wishing you a good day...

KayC

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Thanks, guys, and especially you, Teny. I am coming off a very brutal work week and without much sense of closure on that, but am determined to take some time to honor Linda's memory on her special day (Dec 1, birthday) and ours (Dec 3, anniversary). The current plan is still to have Sunday brunch at a place we frequented on such occasions. We usually combined the two celebrations. I feel strongly that it's something I need to do.

I just traded emails with her aunt in Michigan and I know that the folks up there are hurting too. Her aunt and uncle, mother and stepfather all loved her very much also. They have been a great help to me though, because to most of the outside world the past few years, Linda was a cypher, a ghost, "Bob's sick wife". I have a lot of friends that I wish could have known her as something more than that. At least her family understands what an extraordinary person she was and that helps a lot.

Love to you all,

--Bob

I add my sentiments too, to Bob.

Wishing you a good day...

KayC

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Bob, you're a very strong, positive person. Even though it's long distance it sounds like that's a wonderful family to have. I hope you have a peaceful few days here remembering all the wonderful things you had together. Our good memories seem to be what sustain us through some difficult times.

Your friend, Karen :wub:;)

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Bob

I will be thinking of you in the days ahead. These firsts are so painful. Our anniversary was August 5th (would have been 23 years) and my birthday August 11th and Will and I always celebrated both together as well. He always made it so special. I'm glad you have a plan. I thought I could go to one of our favorite restaruants but in the end I got it to go, came home, ate, lite a candle beside his ashes and renewed our wedding vows. Guess that sounds pretty far our, but it got me through the day. I hope you find comfort in your venture. I think all of us here are so fortunate to have had such loving companions, soulmates, best friends, partners all wrapped up into such beautiful souls created just for each of us. I'm sure Linda will be with you on your special days.

Suzanne

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Bob,

I too will keep you in my thoughts and prayers the next few days. Your Linda I'm sure is proud of how strong you are. Linda will be with you at brunch, not in body but in spirit.

Hugs & prayers, :wub:

Corinne

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Just a thank you note to all for your good wishes.

The weekend went well, basically. Saturday was kind of rough but I actually had a good day Sunday, up at the Compass atop the Hyatt in downtown Phoenix, where I often took Linda on special occasions like our anniversary. As you eat, the restaurant goes through 360 degrees of rotation in 55 minutes and you get a good view of the entire city and much of the Valley.

It was nice to remember all the things we did within sight of that place ... plays at the Herberger, a Pavoratti concert at America West Arena, etc. It was a supernaturally positive experience, and I thought it was going to be painful. I guess she was there with me.

I am going to be scarce here for a few days probably because my main computer had a meltdown Sunday night and I am scrambling to get my old backup machine working temporarily -- lest I have no way to work.

Best to all,

--Bob

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HI BOB I just wonder if you were alone having lunch in that nice restaurant you are describing.?I realy admire your positive way of thinking.That must give you alot of strength and a way to belieave that life and future are waiting for you .Keep strong my friend. TENY

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Bob,

It sounds like it went as well as you could have hoped for, I'm glad it was a positive time for you. And the restaurant sounds wonderful!

Good luck with your computer!

KayC

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Hi Teny,

Not sure if you're asking if I went alone (answer: yes) or if I had any privacy (answer: It wasn't very busy. No one was within a half-dozen tables of me).

I am not as hopeful as you suppose I am. I am really just trying to be practical. I have to accept that she is gone and that I either have to go mad or move on somehow. Visiting the restaurant was just following my instinct. I felt compelled. In this case my instinct was good. Part of me thinks Linda had a hand in the whole thing. I had no reason to expect it would actually feel positive and healing. I could just as well have been gutted by it.

I don't want anyone to try a stunt like this just because I did and it worked. Everyone is different. But maybe the take-away thought is that you can listen to your heart and be open to what it tells you it needs.

You are stronger than you suspect, Teny. You hang in there too, and thank you for your concern for me.

Best,

--Bob

HI BOB I just wonder if you were alone having lunch in that nice restaurant you are describing.?I realy admire your positive way of thinking.That must give you alot of strength and a way to belieave that life and future are waiting for you .Keep strong my friend. TENY

Thanks, KayC. The new computer arrives in the next day or two and then I get to install all my stuff on it. This six year old thing I'm using in the meantime is just barely adequate and it's adding a lot of hours to my work week. Hopefully by Christmas everything will be settled back down.

I think I may just give the busted machine to my son. He has the skills to resurrect it. He got his A+ hardware maintenance certification when he was 11 years old (youngest to ever do it). If he can make it reliable he's probably entitled to keep the thing. I'm a software guy, not a hardware guy. Hardware makes me homocidal. I need it to Just Work and be fast enough for what I have to do.

--Bob

Bob,

It sounds like it went as well as you could have hoped for, I'm glad it was a positive time for you. And the restaurant sounds wonderful!

Good luck with your computer!

KayC

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