WhiteLilly Posted August 17, 2010 Report Share Posted August 17, 2010 I lost my soul mate unexpectedly from a massive heart attack on 7-25-2010. He and his wife (deceased 11-2001) and me and my husband (deceased 5-1999) had been close friends since 1988 and since our spouses' deaths, he and I remained close friends. Within the past 7 years, our relationship changed from close friendship into one of deep love and over that time, we were together for most of the time. As his son and I go through his personal items, we're discovering he had secrets. I know everyone has secrets they don't share with anyone, but what we're finding is disturbing. I'm angry and hurt - he was a philanderer during his marriage; we're finding evidence of hundreds of women - so far. He kept trophies with first names and dates and other details in locked strong boxes. He'd told us these boxes (totaling four), contained important documents, and yes, there are important documents in this one dating back from 1969 to 1976, but about 2/3 of the items are his secrets. His son is also angry because this was not the father he knew and respected. We're both devastated, first by his passing, and second by discovering the man we knew was not the man we knew. We have three more boxes to go and I'm terrified by what we'll find. We discussed letting someone else go through them, but we both decided we didn't want his image tarnished in the eyes of anyone else. We still love him and miss him terribly, and we know he loved us, but the blow to my heart is devastating because I'm scared of what might be in the most current box. How does anyone handle a situation like this? Please, I need advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!Register a new account
Already have an account? Sign in here.Sign In Now