sunstreet Posted June 5, 2011 Report Share Posted June 5, 2011 Hello GH Family, I don't have the energy reserves to respond to everyone's posts. My lupus has flared up, I am having flashbacks to finding Melissa dead, what my family did to her, and surrounding events and times in the months after her death. I am hurting a great deal and just wanted to say hello to every one and know that I hold you all in thought and prayer as you weather your path with loss. I go back to court Monday to learn what the judge has decided and I will be so glad when it is finally done. I think being free of any legal proceedings for the first time since Melissa's death has freed my mind to remember more and to feel more. Such is my path and I remain ever encouraged as always. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted June 5, 2011 Report Share Posted June 5, 2011 Carol Ann, I know I speak for many on this forum when I say we reach out to you, admire you and support you especially as you return to court on Monday. I would agree that getting that behind you will allow you to focus on other things, hopefully including some happy memories of Melissa. I know that is hard to do...at least it is for me....but eventually it will be easier. Peace be with you, Mary mfh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
azbrian Posted June 5, 2011 Report Share Posted June 5, 2011 Carol Ann, I am sorry you are hurting and I hope all goes well on Monday. Take care Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Nicholas Posted June 5, 2011 Report Share Posted June 5, 2011 Good luck & be strong. Metta Nicholas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melina Posted June 5, 2011 Report Share Posted June 5, 2011 Carol Ann, Warm thoughts and prayers for you. I hope this lupus episode calms down and that the trial will finally end with a positive outcome. Do you have someone to talk to about the flashbacks? Melina Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lainey Posted June 5, 2011 Report Share Posted June 5, 2011 Carol Ann, Good luck on Monday. You will be in my thoughts. (((hugs))) Lainey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted June 6, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Thank you one and all for your response to my pain and support of me. I feel so grateful that this will finally be over tomorrow. No matter what the outcome I rest knowing I used my voice to help make a difference so that other clients may not be harmed in therapy. I have been thinking about Melissa all day and remembering all the joy we had and shared, all the camping trips; how she taught me how to fly a kite, make snow angels, roast marshmellows, sitting together every morning, her with her coffee, me with my tea reading the paper. Thinking of how my soul came alive when I thought it was dead. How blessed I am to have been loved and given love. For you Melissa now and eternity! Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 6, 2011 Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Carol Ann, You will be in my thoughts and prayers tomorrow as you find out the outcome. I'm sorry your Lupus is flaring up...it seems you have a hard load to carry. We appreciate your responses when you are able to but understand you can't always be here. Just know we are there with you in spirit. Kay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted June 6, 2011 Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 As you have said to us each time you post, Carol Ann: Blessings and Courage. When you go into that courtroom tomorrow, you carry each and every one of us with you ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted June 6, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Thank you Kay and Marty so very much. My night was fairly good; the sky is blue and the sun is shining brilliantly. I am grateful that I will not have to drive to and from. I have been smiling all morning as I have this image of Melissa giving me the thumbs up as she often did. Love conquers all and love survives death. I am grateful to be welcomed here. I thank you all. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 6, 2011 Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Love DOES, that's how it's able to transcend even death or passage of this life into another...love survives even death. We need to remember that...our loved one still exists. We tend to get our eyes onto what we see and think we've lost what we can't see and touch...forgetting they are still there and we will be reunited someday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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