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Lost Both My Parents 2 Weeks And 3 Days Apart.


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I'm feeling so very, very sad. My mother passed away on June 24th of this year and then my father passed away on July 11th. It's been so unreal and I don't think it has really hit me yet. I didn't really have a chance to deal with Mom's death and then Dad died. I keep waiting for the grief to come, but all I feel is a deep sorrow. I haven't really cried. I had periods where I would break down, but then I would have to stuff it down in order to complete some business regarding the estate or their service. It was nice that we were able to honor them together. My mother had donated her body to science because she had Myasthenia Gravis, so we weren't able to have a funeral for her. We were planning a memorial service when my father contracted aspiration pneumonia. We had a service for him and honored her as well. It was really quite beautiful. I feel so numb and I can't seem to concentrate. I catch myself just staring off into space and I am always taking these deep sighs. I resent that I can't put the rest of the world on hold until I can deal with this and then go back to my life when I can. Life goes on and they would want me to get on with it, but I just don't want to. I don't feel ready to face a world without them.

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Dear Their Youngest,

I am so sorry for your loss. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose both parents so close together. I lost my Grandmother (who was my best friend) in April, my husband left for a new job the week before leaving me with four children, then I had to work on packing everything up to join him on a move that was 1400 miles away. Now - I admit the move and such do not compare to the loss of both parents - but losing Grandma and having all that other change has made me a shell of a person. Most days I don't even know how to think anymore. HUGS!

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I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I lost my mom in November and I can't imagine losing my dad, too. It is one of my biggest fears now. I'm glad you were able to honor both of them at the same service -- as you said, I'm sure it was very beautiful and touching.

Erin

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hi Their Youngest,

I am so so sorry for the loss of your Mom and your Dad, WOW,I can't even begin to imagine the shock and horror of that, I lost my Dad suddenly 19months ago and sometimes still feel stunned by it. I only wish words of comfort existed but they don't. You've had 2 MAJOR shocks of course it feels unreal, I think reality takes a while to set in because our minds simply cannot cope with such trauma all at once.

I can relate to you wanting the rest of the world on hold, I've been thinking that lately a lot, I want the world to stop because my life is still on pause and it hurts to see others just carrying on with life as normal.

I hope you will find some tiny comfort here just to know that as alone as you feel some of us here can relate to some of what you are feeling. None of us knows exactly what someone else is going through but we can relate to some of the feelings.

It is of course hard to concentrate on anything at the moment and I hope you know that's ok, nothing at all wrong with it. I felt like my mind was a blank slate after losing my Dad.

It's horrible facing the world without a parent not to mind both, it's a scary place without that invisible security blanket.

sending you much comfort and ((hugs)), as I always say I only wish there was more that could be said to give comfort but there simply isn't.

Niamh

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Dearest Their Youngest,

I am so very sorry for the loss of both your parents so close together. I lost my mother 11/09 and dad 10 months later 10/10. It is still surreal sometimes. You have had 2 traumatic experiences so close together. Of course you want the world to stop. Being further into my grief, I still want the world to stop sometimes. Unfortunately, as more time goes on, I feel more and more that I have to push the grief down into my gut and "deal with it" on my own. Don't get me wrong, it's not as bad as the beginning but, the waves still come unexpectantly.

I think it was nice, although extremely tough, that you got to honor both of you parents together. I have 2 children and of course I would want them to move on after I'm gone but, simply, that is only possible in one's own time. Be kind to yourself and don't rush it. You are not expected to get over it. People are extremely uncomfortable with a grieving person so many wrong things are said. Please keep coming here when you can. I would be in a completely different place without this site and the wonderful sense of family and comfort I feel from all it's members.

Peace, love and a great big HUG to you.

2sweetgirls

PS. I am their youngest too.

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Guest Nicholas

I lost my mother and father within the space of 4 years and when my father died, I was still only 23. I managed to survive those losses, though I am not sure if I am managing to survive the loss of my son last December. Is it "easier" to cope with the loss of a parent than son or daughter? Who knows, though in my case clearly not.

Take care

Nicholas

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  • 1 month later...

I'm feeling so very, very sad. My mother passed away on June 24th of this year and then my father passed away on July 11th. It's been so unreal and I don't think it has really hit me yet. I didn't really have a chance to deal with Mom's death and then Dad died. I keep waiting for the grief to come, but all I feel is a deep sorrow. I haven't really cried. I had periods where I would break down, but then I would have to stuff it down in order to complete some business regarding the estate or their service. It was nice that we were able to honor them together. My mother had donated her body to science because she had Myasthenia Gravis, so we weren't able to have a funeral for her. We were planning a memorial service when my father contracted aspiration pneumonia. We had a service for him and honored her as well. It was really quite beautiful. I feel so numb and I can't seem to concentrate. I catch myself just staring off into space and I am always taking these deep sighs. I resent that I can't put the rest of the world on hold until I can deal with this and then go back to my life when I can. Life goes on and they would want me to get on with it, but I just don't want to. I don't feel ready to face a world without them.

Dear Their Youngest

I know how you feel and I am struggling to come to terms with the loss of my parents 18days apart.

My mum came to help me with the birth of my 3rd child and after 2 months of e giving birth she fell ill unexpectedly and needed emergency surgery. She died in ICU a few hours later on the 07/08/11 It was very very painfull and I was struggling with her death and the grieving process. I have just arrived back from South Africa with my 3 young kids and husband and my dad died suddenly of a mmassive heart attack on the 25/08/11 He was heart broken. Family are wanting to raising funds for me to go back home but the trauma is to much for me I dont think I bear to see my dad buried

Friends and family do not know what to say to me both my parents were 70yrs old and their loss is enormous for me. They were goin to be married for 49yrs next week Thursday. I called dad everyday even on the day he died he told me he was fine and the shock of his sudden death is too much for me and antidepressants appear to numb me

Hope I can attend a grieving couselling session.

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Hi Their youngest, I can not even imagine how hard it would be to deal with two deaths so close together... I will keep you in my prayers and ask God to help you deal with the upcoming weeks... My mom died April 18 2005 and my dad died August 25 2005.. they were four months apart... Sending you a peaceful hug... Shelley

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  • 1 year later...

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