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4 Kittens Left Without A Momma


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Hi everyone, I am in need of support and advice right now. 3 days ago I put flea treatment on my cat without even thinking that if I put it somewhere she coud reach (I put it on her back and neck) she would lick it and get sick. She has not come home since then and I have had to start feeding her 4 week old kittens milk replacement and stimulate the to go to the bathroom. I feel such imense guilt over Molly being gone and it is even worse that my family is very unsuportive. My husband keeps trying to tell me what he thinks I want to hear (that someone took her in and she is fine) but I know she has past on because she NEVER leaves for this long and always stays close by. When I tell him that she is gone he maks me feel as if my feelings don't mean anything because she was "just an animal." My sister deals with things by joking and she even said to me last night that "If she had accidentaly killed me she would have taken care of my daughter too" because I have been taking care of the kittens. This feels terribl I keep thinking that I could have just followed the directions on the box and not been so stupid, or at least could have kept her in the house to keep an eye on her, but I didn't and now she is gone and her kittens still need her. I can not stop crying, I haven't slept at night and I keep thinking of her alone and suffering or dead under some bush. I can't even take it anymore and it is just that much harder that I feel it is my fault. I have pictures of when we first got her a year ago and she was 6 weeks old and my daugher was about 4 months old and I always thought they would grow up together. My daughter would kiss her and pull her tail and Molly wold just sit and tae it purrig away as she got her constant beating from our overly loving toddler. We have decided to keep 2 of the kittens and give one to my mother in law and hope to find a good home close by for the last kitten. Everything I read says you shouldn't jump right into getting a new pet but I feel we were left without a choice, we are all attatched to the kittens. I just hope that I don't forever feel that I killed our first family pet and remember this sad time through our new kittens. Anyways if anyone read this thank you for listening as I am having a tough time dealing with this alone.

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Hi There,

You really shouldn't feel guilty about putting the flea medication on the mother cat, it should go on the back of the neck, i don't think it would have killed her, i would have to agree with your husband, thinking that she is ok somewhere and just wondered off, have you checked with your neighbors perhaps one of them have taken her in. You could also try putting an ad in your local newspaper under lost and found, maybe if you have a picture of her post them around your neighborhood. We have several cats all indoor cats and one had got out and we looked for days, we went door to door looking, i even called the police dept trying to report him being lost, they did take a descripion of the cat, i think they thought i was tapped in the head, but we did find him 4 days later and he was just across the street hiding and scared. so don't give up hope, I hope you find her soon.


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Dear One, I know how agonizing an ambiguous loss like this can be, when a beloved pet goes missing and you don't know exactly what, if anything, has happened to her. I'm so sorry. Please pay a visit to the Missing Pets page of my Grief Healing website, where you'll find some articles and resources that may be helpful to you.

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I'm sorry your cat is missing.

I don't know what brand flea meds you administered, but I think most of them are likely made so that the manufacturers assume that although you put it on the neck, the cat might lick it, so I would think that ingesting a little bit would not kill a cat.

The companies that make the stuff know the cat is bound to ingest some of it, so I'd think it's got to be a little safe for them to swallow a tiny bit.

You said,

When I tell him that she is gone he maks me feel as if my feelings don't mean anything because she was "just an animal."

I hate it when people make the comment,

"it was just a [insert animal type here - dog, cat, whatever]"

as though that makes missing an animal idiotic, or as though it makes animal cruelty/ suffering/ neglect perfectly acceptable or excusable. It does not.

And there is nothing wrong about missing a pet or being concerned for its fate or welfare, or crying for a pet if it has passed away. Your husband sounds highly insensitive.

I'd still try to hold out hope that kitty will return. I've seen two different stories on Animal Planet, very similar.

One family pet, a cat, wandered on to a shipping container and was sent from the USA to France, and that cat went missing for a couple of weeks before being returned to the family. Similar thing happened to another cat.

Have you called your local animal shelters in your area to see if they have your cat?

Also tell your neighbors about her, maybe make up a batch of fliers with her photo (or a description of the cat) with your name and phone number and post them all over your area.

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This just came to me via Animal Spirit Healing & Education, and I thought of you immediately, Molly's mommy. I'm including it here just in case you (or anyone else reading this post) may be interested:

Free one-hour Teleseminar, Communicating with Lost Pets, featuring Tim Link, Animal Communicator and Lost Pet Specialist, on Wednesday, August 3, 2011. Click on Communicating with Lost Pets with Tim Link

Date: Wednesday, August 3rd

Time: 5:30pm Pacific, 6:30pm Mountain, 7:30pm Central, 8:30pm Eastern

Duration: 60 minutes

Note that this class is digitally recorded, so even if you are unable to attend the call live, you still receive both the audio stream and MP3 downloadable audio links via e-mail the day following the live call.

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I'm sorry for what you are going through...I was recently frantic when my cat was missing because she is never gone long, but she came back. Cats are very independent creatures, and very unpredictable. I doubt the medicine killed her, even if it made her sick, she'd likely recover.

Try to let go of people's unthinking comments...they sometimes say off the wall things when they want to comfort us but don't know how. I hope you are able to care for the four kittens until they're able to be adopted out...maybe she'll come back and help you.

Try not to worry about her though, I know it's hard, but I've had cats wander off, you miss them and wonder but it doesn't necessarily mean a bad fate befell them.

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