Guest Guest_Jen_* Posted February 3, 2006 Report Share Posted February 3, 2006 I miss my mom and dad so much. I lost my mom earlier last month at 56, cause of death unknown. I'm still in shock and can't believe it. I lost my dad 5 years ago from a heart attack. I feel so helpless and confused. Today I couldn't get out of bed. I wanted to just lie there and not move forever. I finally had to force myself out of bed. I cried and screamed all the way to work. It was horrible. Why did they leave me here is this awful world. My mother and I became so close after my dad passed on. She was devastated and I tried my best to be there for her. She was my best friend. And now she's gone. Sometimes I dont' even know what to do, to say, to think or to feel. this can't be real?! No way, she wouldn't leave me. She just wouldn't have. I am single with no kids. So she was my everything. I need help. I try to find grief counseling groups, but it seems like nothing can stop this pain I feel. I find writing and reading other's memoirs really helpful. I try to think what both her and my dad would have wanted. Maybe for me to feel ok and move on. I don't know. This world scares me. Does anyone feel the same way?! It took me 3 years to finally be able to talk about my father without tearing up. But I was way closer to my mom. It scares me to think about going on without her. How long will it take? 5, 10 years? Never...I find myself obsessing over this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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